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I have two approx. 9 yr. old dogs. The first one (female chocolate lab) became part of our family right from being weaned & was 4 months old when my husband died. The second one (male lab mix) came along about 5 months later via a shelter/rescue. We estimated him to be almost a year old when I adopted him. So it's been the 3 of us for almost 8 yrs. My male has terminal cancer & after surgery 3 weeks ago, we estimate he has 1-3 months left.
Should I bring my female dog with us when it's time to say goodbye? I don't know if my girl will need to see him passed on to know he's gone? Will she sense it anyway without having to go with me? Will it matter either way?
Thank you for your opinions & insight. I searched the threads & didn't find this topic; my apologies if it's been addressed.
I would take the other dog with u ... When we put my older horse to sleep the younger one watch then after walked up nugged her then walked over to me gave a big sigh... was sad but at least she knew.
NO! She already knows he's ill. Remember, dogs can smell cancer in humans. And even without cancer, she'd know. And don't forget, she's experienced this once before with your husband. (the knowing)
ALWAYS do what the animals do in their own lives.
When dogs die they LEAVE the pack and go out in the woods to die alone. It's not like elephants who have a ceremony.
You're the pack leader and your job is to keep the remaining pack in calm stable balance.
It will do NO good whatsoever to make that dog experience the unstable, unbalanced energy of that whole experience. THEN she'll feel obligated to "fix" the vague confusing "problem" which, of course, she cannot do. That problem being YOUR unstable emotion. And the drama at the vet office. Or if her attempts to be a leader fail she'll just make herself small, stay out of the way and try and not make things worse.
Dogs will reflect the energy in their surroundings.
I had to kick the vet tech out of the room at my dog's euth. She was HYPER DRAMATIC and hysterical clinging to MY DOG on the table talking non stop, crying etc. WTH. I kicked her out, took the dog for a walk down the block and back into the room and said "OK up" onto the table and acted like it was just another procedure that he was used to getting from his friend, the vet. He knew the vet was going to help him.
And let me tell you something important. My mother's Lab got a malignant melanoma of the upper jaw after my mother died after a year of her suffering in a nursing home. She was 13 years old and given 6 months to live after we debulked it. Because the vet said it would grow back with a vengeance and be too aggressive for surgery again. She came to live with me.
NOTHING happened for 3 more years and we assumed the lab results had to have been wrong.
Whoops, no. It grew back again with a vengeance. At age 16. Same EXACT spot.
WHEN? Three years later, the week after my Bulldog died after a long painful illness.
STRESS is very bad for a dog.
As difficult as it is, you will need to assume an UPBEAT NORMAL and balanced demeanor. Taking her for fun walks, going after new smells and adventures and being the "ONE" now. Besides, I watch Long Island Medium and totally believe that human and dogs spirits are on the other side together and that dogs can probably see them. I've seen alot of death on our Yahoo Megaesophagus board and lots of stories from owners where their dogs seem to be looking "past them" at something after a recent death.
As difficult as it is, you will need to assume an UPBEAT NORMAL and balanced demeanor. Taking her for fun walks, going after new smells and adventures and being the "ONE" now. Besides, I watch Long Island Medium and totally believe that human and dogs spirits are on the other side together and that dogs can probably see them. I've seen alot of death on our Yahoo Megaesophagus board and lots of stories from owners where their dogs seem to be looking "past them" at something after a recent death.
Take care.
Thx runswithscissors for your insight. Your last paragraph especially reminded me of something my female dog did right after my husband died. I used to put her on my husband's lap while he was in bed. A few days after the funeral, I went into his bedroom to strip down the bed. I glanced over to see Piper sitting in the middle of the room, just looking up at ...something. She was doing that cute head tilt thing. Then she stood up & started wagging her tail. I said, "Piper, do you see Daddy?". As soon as I said the word daddy, she barked & jumped, tail wagging the whole time. It was really cool to see.
By the way, I tried to leave a comment rep for both of you, all it's doing is letting me leave anonymous reps. But thank you both... I appreciate you taking the time to respond.
When we had to put Kona down last year we did not take Sophie with us to the Vets. She knew Kona was dying and I didn't want her to associate the Vet with anything sad.
I'm sorry about your dog, spoil him rotten for as long as you can.
A suggestion would be in home pet euthanasia. It's easier on them, they are in a familiar, non clinical, comfortable surrounding, it's easier on you, you don't have to get them to a vet's office, you are in a comfortable surrounding, you can choose to have your family, your friends, other animals there.
I don't think it would be productive to bring your other dog. I have always buried my dogs in the yard at home and allowed the other dogs to see their deceased pack mate before I bury them. They seem to understand. There is no need for them to witness the death.
Thx Buzz Bee & Wartrace...I never considered home euthanasia. I wasn't so much thinking along the lines of letting my Piper witness Moose being put down; more that if she did not see him dead, would she wonder for days or weeks where he was? But I also wasn't taking into account how perceptive dogs are; as Runswithscissors stated - Piper may already know how sick Moose is. This will be my first dog out of 8 that I have ever had to euthanize for reasons other than old age. I guess I just am trying to be as emotionally prepared as possible.
Appreciate all of you giving your thoughts on this!
I highly recommend you lay the deceased dog out for the other to see. I lost my dog "Larry" this spring and while I was away on vacation. The other dogs were in the kennel with him and the kennel owner took him to the vet. All the other dogs knew was that Larry left the kennel. When I returned home I laid his body out while I dug the hole; the other dogs sniffed him and watched as I placed him in the ground. They seemed to understand what happened.
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