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Location: Formerly Pleasanton Ca, now in Marietta Ga
10,347 posts, read 8,564,711 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by eddiehaskell
There’s no way we can make a blanket statement about money that applies to MY child and their decision making process that I will have helped develop. Like I said, my goal is to steer my child toward not being materialistic...
Lol
Many parents have goals to steer their kids in one way or another. Many of them fail, sometimes through no fault of their own. Kids are individuals and will get their own ideas. Of course if you isolate your kid from all others they may not be infuenced by them, but they might be a sheltered non functioning kid By then.
You hope to steer your kid in one direction, but what if it doesn’t work out?
It’s like your lifestyle now, what if it doesn’t work out. It only has worked for a short time and is untested.
Lol
Many parents have goals to steer their kids in one way or another. Many of them fail, sometimes through no fault of their own. Kids are individuals and will get their own ideas. Of course if you isolate your kid from all others they may not be infuenced by them, but they might be a sheltered non functioning kid By then.
You hope to steer your kid in one direction, but what if it doesn’t work out?
It’s like your lifestyle now, what if it doesn’t work out. It only has worked for a short time and is untested.
So isn’t everything with children based on hope? Guiding your child toward having a 4.0 gpa and attending the best college can inspire hope that they’ll be successful in life but it’s no guarantee.
"Maturity" is a very poorly defined concept because people label behaviors as "immature" based on their own (biased) expectations of what "mature" behavior should be, which is usually socially constructed/traditionalist/arbitrary.
A better question would be, how likely is an individual to blow through a large sum of money quickly if they are given the opportunity?
Based on the poor money management of so many that end up becoming "statistics", I'd venture to guess it's in the neighborhood of 40% at least. You can probably reduce that somewhat if you teach money management, but there are some things that it is harder to teach (for example, is it OK to take more money out for a house downpayment "just one time", etc.?)
It isn’t poorly defined because it’s my child and my idea of maturity.
Likelihood means nothing. I will set a track for my child and if I’m happy with their progress I may choose to help them become even more successful financially. Or heck, maybe my child will say “ya know what dad, I appreciate the offer, but I got this” - ideally that would be the best, but I understand that sometimes a small amount of money earlier in life can pay huge dividends later in life.
And that’s why I never mentioned any kind of $200k lump sum payment at 18. Granted, I hope I could do that and my child could manage, but I never would.
Last edited by eddiehaskell; 12-16-2019 at 11:55 AM..
There's book smart and street smart and while teenagers have brains that are very capable of being extremely book smart, their brains are also still developing the street smart part of higher level function, which studies show often doesn't fully come online until age 25 or so.
Why doesn't the county allow 14 year old kids taking college classes to buy alcohol?
Why doesn't the country allow 14 year old kids taking college classes to buy cigarettes?
Why is there an age of consent for sexual activity?
Why are states pushing the ability to get an unrestricted driver's license later and later? (And why do parents pay insane rates for auto insurance when they have a teen driver in their household?)
It's because those teens who are often quite good at spitting out the correct answers in a classroom struggle to make good decisions outside of it.
Finance is math. It isn’t street smarts. Every financial decision we make is basically a math problem.
Location: We_tside PNW (Columbia Gorge) / CO / SA TX / Thailand
34,705 posts, read 58,031,425 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by eddiehaskell
I’ve always liked this quote
“Normal is getting dressed in clothes that you buy for work, driving through traffic in a car that you are still paying for, in order to get to a job that you need so you can pay for the clothes, car and the house that you leave empty all day in order to afford to live in it.”
Ellen Goodman
I have always liked this quote.... King Solomon (man of little want, but great wisdom)
Prov 6
10“A little sleep, a little slumber,
A little folding of the hands to rest”—
11Your poverty will come in like a vagabond
And your need like an armed man.
My favorite book.... Ecclesiastes - vanity of vanities.... Striving after the things of this world.
Thus U &I exist on opposite ends of the spectrum.
"Could giving an 18 year old $200k be a better investment than college?"
Location: Formerly Pleasanton Ca, now in Marietta Ga
10,347 posts, read 8,564,711 times
Reputation: 16689
Quote:
Originally Posted by eddiehaskell
So isn’t everything with children based on hope? Guiding your child toward having a 4.0 gpa and attending the best college can inspire hope that they’ll be successful in life but it’s no guarantee.
Sure, but I think living by the idea of hoping for the best and preparing for the worse is a good idea.
I have a friend who tells me she can't figure out why her son is not turning out like they thought.
Good student with good upbringing.
Goes off to college, gets involved with people not like himself, winds up having drug problems and flunking out of college the first year.
She thought they did everything right until this unexpected thing happened. The boy had to move back home and it's been two years trying to get him back on track.
It isn’t poorly defined because it’s my child and my idea of maturity.
Likelihood means nothing. I will set a track for my child and if I’m happy with their progress I may choose to help them become even more successful financially. Or heck, maybe my child will say “ya know what dad, I appreciate the offer, but I got this” - ideally that would be the best, but I understand that sometimes a small amount of money earlier in life can pay huge dividends later in life.
And that’s why I never mentioned any kind of $200k lump sum payment at 18. Granted, I hope I could do that and my child could manage, but I never would.
You are being inconsistent.
First you ask a question about why "we" do something with "our" children, which implies you are asking about the collective of all of the generational cohort. Then when I give an answer, you get really defensive and act like I was trying to tell you what you should or shouldn't give to your own child.
In other words, you want to tell us to stay out of what you do in your family, but then push your opinions on us.
Parents in Sydney who have that sort of money available will generally keep it to contribute to the cost of the kid's first house purchase. Most people who can make a contribution as the price of real estate here is increasingly unaffordable for young people. It would rarely be at 18 though.
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