Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
No, the school helped instill discipline and respect. It was an extra help.
Discipline is an interesting word. One definition is
the practice of training people to obey rules or a code of behavior, using punishment to correct disobedience.
interestingly one dictionary indicates that instruction is an obsolete synonym.
So in some senses discipline has come to mean punishment and obedience more or less. I think that is too bad. We all wind up cheerfully agreeing that discipline is a great thing. Is it?
What does obedience to rules really get us? Who writes the rules? Can anyone foresee what someone might do with a poorly chosen set of rules? A boy who knows the rule "No means no" thinks what when she is not capable of saying anything? Of course, there is precedent for that one. But what about boys cajoling, lying, blaming and demeaning to get the supposed yes? There are boys (grown men alas!) who think that this is perfectly ok, not in any way wrong, mean or disgusting. Not picking on boys. The rule model just fails.
I like this, very unfashionable definition:
training that corrects, molds, or perfects the mental faculties or moral character
Most parents can't say no nowadays. There you're taught you've to work hard to get any prizes. And you don't get too familiar with teachers, which I find excellent.
MOST? Maybe some parents can't say no, but that has always been the case. I am 47 years old and I remember kids who had parents that didn't ever say no to them.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ThomasX51
Of course my mother used to go crazy with an all boys birthday party.
When my kids were in elementary school they had all boy birthday parties even though they went to mixed gender schools.
Still, you get much more attentive teachers than any public school will be able to provide. And the sense of union among students is very good.
But there are many private schools where you can get that without being subject to the rigidity you describe. My kids go to a private, college prep school. They get much more attention than they would at public school. They wear uniforms and are expected to behave in school and out of school. The school offers almost any sports team, club and activity that you can imagine. However, it is not as rigid as you describe and both boys and girls attend. The school is for PK3-12 grade.
There is a tremendous sense of community. Bullying is dealt with swiftly as is drug use. All without rigid and abusive methods.
I don't know if gender-segregated schools are better or not but I would not send my child to one. I can't imagine that they are better for social development at least and I know I would have hated to go to one. And I would definitely not send my child to a school that practices harsh military-style discipline.
What the OP is talking about sounds more like a boarding school or a school for at-risk boys. I went to an all boys catholic school for 9-12 grades & I think the experience was great. Of course in New Orleans, the public schools suck, and the private schools are $25K a year, so single sex catholic schools are the most popular option.
If my son was a kid always in trouble, I would send him to a school like the OP went to with strict discipline & rules. But if he was not a trouble kid, I would have no issue sending him to an all boys school like I went to.
I don't know if gender-segregated schools are better or not but I would not send my child to one. I can't imagine that they are better for social development at least and I know I would have hated to go to one. And I would definitely not send my child to a school that practices harsh military-style discipline.
We hung out with the all girls school crowd as much as any other kids did. We just did it outside of school hours. Just because you attend a single sex school doesn't mean you never see anyone of the opposite sex.
We hung out with the all girls school crowd as much as any other kids did. We just did it outside of school hours. Just because you attend a single sex school doesn't mean you never see anyone of the opposite sex.
But hanging out with the opposite sex outside of school hours isn't the same as working with them during school hours.
There are millions of benefits. We were checked twice a day (before going in and coming out) to make sure nobody brought drugs, cigs or weapons and then to make sure nobody stole anything. To this day, none of us smokes or has got into trouble.
Wouldn't you have that at many private schools? I thought this thread was about single gender schools.
Quote:
Originally Posted by plmokn
Bottom line, is the expense worth the benefit? Is the value added significant? If your kid is in a decent public school, the benefit of a private or all boys...school is negligible. Stick the $20K/year x 4 years = $80K in a mutual fund...
His tuition was about 1/4 that. (It was a parochial single sex school.) And we have a very good local public high school. We just saw a lot of kids, especially boys, fall flat on their faces while attending our big public high school.
Quote:
Originally Posted by rrah
I previously worked in a single sex high school. If I recall the research correctly, boys benefit from a single sex environment in the elementary grades. Girls benefit from a single sex environment in high school.
We didn't have any elementary single gender schools in our area. The boys in ours son's high school said they appreciated the lack of "distraction" of girls being present. However, I don't know that that's always such a positive.
In my child's elementary school there is often a class of all boys. It is a specialty school that only accepts children with learning disabilities, and they tend to have more male applicants. Many of these kids have ADHD, as well, and one thing that struck me is that they demand much better behavior than at my child's previous private school--which wasn't loosy goosy either. . .These children are required to sit up straight while in their seats and to fold their hands on top of their desk when they've finished their work. (They also go outside to play 2 and sometimes 3 times a day.) I just think it is instructive that this school takes a room full of the most disruptive kids you can imagine--and holds them to a higher behavioral standard than regular kids. And it works!!
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
