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First, I don't think there is a lie in your lie. You are realistic. Trailers deteriorate and it won't last forever. You do have plans to rebuild, just don't know when. Also not a lie. The details are really no ones business. I don't think its wise to tell people you own things free and clear, how much debt or money you have. I don't live in a trailer, but by all appearances modest means and prefer to fly under the radar. If I have to tell people my financial worth to get them to like they aren't the kind of people I want around me.
I think you should give people a chance first. I think you will find not all of them judge people the way you are expecting.
Stay true to yourself. They should be the ones envious of you. Your home is paid for and I bet none of theirs are. If you feel uncomfortable just don't divulge a lot of personal info about yourself. They should respect your privacy.
Good luck in your new endeavor. Hopefully you will like those people as much as you want them to like you.
Stay true to yourself. They should be the ones envious of you. Your home is paid for and I bet none of theirs are. If you feel uncomfortable just don't divulge a lot of personal info about yourself. They should respect your privacy.
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The point is, they won't. They will still judge you, negatively, and that is not to your advantage.
20yrsinBranson, we live alike but have different outlooks. I chose a spot in the country to AVOID those kinds of people. I have a manufactured home on a few acres of land surrounded by trees. My idea of a carefree life is to have Big Brother leave me alone. When the tax bills come I always appeal, and win.
I don't hob-nob with anyone; however, I hold my own when I travel, when I attend church, or am out and about. I do not discuss money with anyone and I treat everyone the same- if they look rich or poor (and it's usually the poor people wearing the designer clothing). People have no clue what my bank account is and I prefer it to stay that way.
When people do strike up converstation about money I always say, "must be really nice to have ________". Or if they talk about a trip to some place- I don't add that I've been there already....they never know.
And if it's directed at me to purchase something or whatever, I always reply that I am broke, and I always drink water with my meal while dining out.
No one needs to know. And I feel safer that way. My home is humble on the outside and the car I drive is more humble looking. I do not want to be a target to anyone.
And I love my home! I renovated this old place to keep it looking old on the outside....but inside....when my family comes to visit they are in awe- telling me I should get photos and publish them in a magazine.
Me? Of course not! No one needs to know!
That's such a touchy spot that you're in, 20yrs...my first thought when reading your initial post was, "no, better to be completely honest, deep down people respect honesty"- but then again...in that type of business world that you're dealing with, it's like a whole different animal. Is it the type of business situation where you have to be totally social? Wherever I work, I'm completely friendly with everyone that I know there, but I don't socialize after hours with anyone, even if I'm asked I always have an excuse not to go- not that I'm anti-social, I just...well, maybe I'm anti-social- LOL.
Normally, you probably don't care what people think- but then again, you're in a bit of a different situation- and I hate lying, I really do- just makes me completely uncomfortable. However...maybe if asked you could just tell them that you're in temporary housing until you build?
Do you really think the conversation will ever come up? I'd probably just say I live on an acreage. Asking what type of house you live in beyond that would be amazingly rude. If someone DOES ask you a direct question, and you feel the need to say it, I'd probably tell them that you fell in love with the land, love the quiet of living in the country, and that you plan on building eventually, but for now you're still deciding what you want to do. That's the truth, isn't it? If you act ashamed of it or defensive, they'll wonder what's up. If you're confident and positive, no one will think anything of your explanation. I absolutely wouldn't make comments like "it's paid for." Your financial situation, good or bad, or the reasons WHY you're living in a trailer are absolutely none of their business. It's tacky for someone to ask at all--letting them know you're not going to go there puts the boundaries in place in a positive way.
If it helps, I'm in a somewhat similar situation. My husband is in upper management--we're fortunate that he has a very good job and a solid career. When we moved to this area, housing prices were going through the roof. Instead of buying a McMansion, we found a fixer upper turn of the century farmhouse (structurally sound) with the space we needed for a growing family. We didn't want to get trapped if the market fell (and it did) plus we didn't want to tie all of our money up in a house. We've been working on it slowly, doing the work ourselves on a budget, and it's lovely now. If the subject comes up, we usually just say that we love living in the country, and that we're "old house people." We make it sound great (and it is, both financially and in terms of lifestyle)--no one ever questions it. In fact, a number of people have commented on how they wish they'd done the same thing. It helps that I'm an artist, and people expect me to walk a little off the beaten path anyway . We're going to have to relocate to another area this year, and we should be able to at least sell the house for what we have in it (hopefully a little more). We will be one of the few families we know who haven't lost their shirt selling their house. Our home isn't paid for yet, but it's just about there.
I thought I wrote this somewhere before, apologies if its a repeat that I've overooked.
Your right to personal privacy includes the right to be deceptive about your personal affairs. If somebody asks you how many gold coins you have in a shoe box on your closet shelf, you have a right to say "None." Or "1,000". Even if neither is true.
We purchased a small 'ranch' outside of town. We are living in temporary quarters while we decide what and where to build on the property.
That's enough. You don't have to volunteer more info.
That's perfect. No need to bring the trailer up under any circumstances, and it's all the truth
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. We're going to have to relocate to another area this year, and we should be able to at least sell the house for what we have in it (hopefully a little more). We will be one of the few families we know who haven't lost their shirt selling their house. Our home isn't paid for yet, but it's just about there.
