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Old 01-21-2015, 12:37 PM
 
Location: Florida -
10,213 posts, read 14,843,144 times
Reputation: 21848

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Due to the cost, I have torn out my home security system, stopped paying the monthly fees and even resigned from the Neighborhood Watch Program.

I have installed a Syrian flag on my front porch, an Iranian flag next to my flower bed and the black flag of ISIS waves from my roof-top.

The state police, city police, sheriff, FBI, CIA and Homeland Security are all watching my house 24/7.

I've never felt safer.

(sent in an anonymous email)
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Old 01-21-2015, 03:10 PM
 
Location: Greater NYC, USA
2,761 posts, read 3,429,421 times
Reputation: 1737
This is funny
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Old 01-21-2015, 03:45 PM
 
47 posts, read 60,416 times
Reputation: 110
Lol
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Old 01-22-2015, 01:16 PM
 
Location: UpstateNY
8,612 posts, read 10,769,221 times
Reputation: 7596
Lmao
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Old 01-22-2015, 04:54 PM
 
1,080 posts, read 1,193,254 times
Reputation: 633
lmao
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Old 01-27-2015, 06:13 AM
 
4,899 posts, read 6,229,400 times
Reputation: 7473
Hilarious.
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Old 01-27-2015, 03:46 PM
 
1,212 posts, read 2,254,000 times
Reputation: 1149
haha
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Old 02-02-2015, 11:51 PM
 
Location: Tucson/Nogales
23,222 posts, read 29,066,081 times
Reputation: 32633
I put a big sticker on my window: I love The FBI And? I ordered a lifelike replica of J. Edgar Hoover to stand outside my living room window with his finger pointing at the sticker!

And? Someone chopped his head off and then threw it through my living room window!

Right now, the FBI is doing an investigation!
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Old 02-03-2015, 12:54 PM
 
Location: Mid-Atlantic
32,946 posts, read 36,394,363 times
Reputation: 43799
The guy forgot the speaker on the roof announcing the call to prayer and the doormat which reads: Due to the rising cost of ammunition, I'm no longer able to provide a warning shot.
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