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I just have to say that I love Los Angeles, and it's the only city this gypsy wanderer could call home for any length of time. My husband and I have back an forth from Los Angeles to Florida several times in the past few years, just trying to make something work. He is a carpenter and there is NO work for him in either of those states. We kept trying to move to Florida because we thought it would be cheaper, but I would instantly miss LA and we would find our way back.
I'm a freelance writer and have had a steady client for the past three years, which is how all of those moves were possible. The work is now slowly drying up and we now have a four-month-old baby, so my husband HAS to find work ASAP. He is in the carpenter's union and we heard that there is work in New Orleans, so that is where we are headed next week.
I wanted to try and stay here in LA so badly, but we can only afford a studio apartment and no one will accept the three of us. I've been searching and searching for a place since we have to be out of our current apt. next week, but I can't come up with anything. It is frustrating and heartbreaking that no one wants to give us a chance and a home. They all say a studio would be too small for us but we know we could make it.
My husband has really been pushing for New Orleans so he can (hopefully) get back to work. We've visited the city many times and really like it a lot, but I never thought I could live there. I am scared of the crime and it just seems so dirty. I feel hopeless right now though, and like we have no other choice but to move. We have to go where the work is or we won't survive.
We're packing up to leave LA again and my heart is breaking once again. Have you ever tried to make it work over and over again in city you love but it just doesn't? The upside is that our families live in IL and WI, so we can easily drive up to see them. I don't fly so I have no idea how they will see our new baby anytime soon if we don't move within driving distance. Driving from LA to the Midwest takes days. My parents are older and my dad is in poor health, so I'd feel really bad if something happens before they meet our daughter.
Sorry I'm just rambling. I am upset right now and was wondering if anyone could relate to loving a city that just doesn't love you back.
The question implies that the person has a functioning life in the loved place.
If they don't have that... then there isn't really a question to explore.
Quote:
Have you ever tried to make it work over and over again in city you love but it just doesn't?
I feel for you I really do I would hate it too but hey you must do what you have too . I think that sometimes we just bite the bullet and go where we need to get work and in this economy that is pretty much anywhere . I hate the midwest and am leaving I hope soon . I am done with these winters here and need warm days and no snow . Take care and I hope you can learn to like New Orleans but yes it is dirty and the crime is pretty bad , i agree my sister lives there and I dont visit often because I just dont like that city . I m not trying to offend anyone i just dont care for new orleans .
Good point, Mr. Rational. We don't have functional lives here because my husband can't find a job and we have no money. Maybe I can learn to love New Orleans (or at least tolerate it) if we aren't struggling financially anymore. Sadly, LA just means struggling to me now.
I hear you, Phonelady - I grew up in the Midwest and couldn't wait to escape it! New Orleans is 100 times better than the Midwest (at least in my eyes), so at least there's that. Does your sister like living there?
i lived in new orleans recently for close to a year - just moved home this month.
i have to ask - what neighborhood are you moving to? did you research your new home? because it's a checkerboard city; one block will be fine, and the next will be iffy.
i ended up leaving because i got sick of all the issues there, including the crime, and i had grown homesick (i had no one near me i was close to.) if you stick to certain areas you should be okay, but it's just depressing to hear about the shootings day after day. you'll have to learn which sections/blocks are okay or not, and once you do, you just avoid them.
now, apart from my negative nancy warnings new orleans is a very exciting place to live. there is so much culture and so much to do all the time. it is also exceptionally beautiful - the architecture and live oaks are breathtaking. people are extremely friendly and perfect strangers will say hi to you and offer you assistance if you need it. it's also very laid back which might be a great change of pace from LA. there are endless bars, art galleries, restaurants - everything you'd ever want, and it would take a lifetime to explore it all. it's a complicated city and it's not for everyone. if you can accept its flaws, i think it's a fine place to live.
for me, though, it was like LA for you - it didn't seem to want me back. i moved there twice and both moves failed. the first time i intended to go there was actually two weeks before katrina. so i know perfectly well what you mean - that painful rejection from a city you love, where you just can't make it work no matter how hard you try. i'm not a spiritual person at all, but it's very hard for me not to think that this is some kind of sign pointing me in another direction. perhaps, though you love LA, it's not right for you at this time - not to worry, because you have many years in the future to get back there.
feel free to ask questions about new orleans if you have any. i could write a novel about my experiences there and am happy to help.
Sorry to hear about your dilema. If you had named just about any other place you were moving, I would say just suck it up for a while, but New Orleans is pretty nasty.... In fact, most of southern Louisiana along the I-10 corridor seems to be that way. Louisiana tops my list of states I would never want to live... Sorry, just being honest.
All that being said, if that's what you have to do then that's what you have to do. I have always found it easier to accept a difficult situation by saying.... "This sucks, but I will deal with it."
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Moved for jobs (internationally and US). Not the end of the world. BUT, your planned destination is not pleasing to many.
I would not burden DH with your attitude. You don't HAVE to fly, as he can work there and come home every couple weeks.
or... you can get a small place in a CHEAP small DECENT town, within a reasonable drive to New Orleans, and he can live in a 'work van' while there. BTDT too. It is often ez'r for the worker bee to be able to concentrate and work 12-16 hrs / day, get the green and plan for a move to a decent place.
Wow, I see that New Orleans is not a popular city, LOL! Lucky for us, we DO like it, at least when we visit. I always hate leaving because we have so much fun there, but I know that visiting a city and living in it are two different things. I guess I will just have to suck it up, but it will hurt to leave LA again. We plan on moving back in a few years if the work finally picks up for him. Here's hoping! I know the only reason why it doesn't work here is because we never have enough money. I'm starting to really hate how money rules your life and shatters dreams.
I'm sorry you're having a similar experience, Hershey. I'm not sure where we will live in NO - I want either the Garden District or Uptown. Why didn't it work out for you there? Was it a financial thing, too? The one thing I like about NO is that it seems like it's never boring - I HATE being bored and love exploring new places. I'm worried that Louisiana is called the "sportsman's paradise" - do a lot of people in the city hunt?? I'm a vegetarian and I can't stand seeing dead animals strapped to cars. I grew up in Wisconsin and seeing that every fall disgusted me.
Summerwriter, time to think of this move as an adventure! Life is an adventure and every place has good things and bad things--it's up to you to find the good! I was born and raised in CA--Big Bear Lake and then the Valley and I am a grandmother now. We moved to the Southeast 4 years ago so we could afford to at least semi-retire. No, it's not easy but no one ever told me it would be. I miss the heck out of CA. My DH doesn't miss it at all! I still have trouble calling this home but have come to understand you make any place what you want it to be. Honestly when we visited CA last time I missed being here. It will take time but you have to have an optimistic attitude or you will never be happy with any move. Money does make life a lot easier and I am sure your DH will be much happier if he has a good job. Nothing is forever--always remember that!! Life can be and is an adventure if you let it be!!!
I just have to say that I love Los Angeles, and it's the only city this gypsy wanderer could call home for any length of time. My husband and I have back an forth from Los Angeles to Florida several times in the past few years, just trying to make something work. He is a carpenter and there is NO work for him in either of those states. We kept trying to move to Florida because we thought it would be cheaper, but I would instantly miss LA and we would find our way back.
I'm a freelance writer and have had a steady client for the past three years, which is how all of those moves were possible. The work is now slowly drying up and we now have a four-month-old baby, so my husband HAS to find work ASAP. He is in the carpenter's union and we heard that there is work in New Orleans, so that is where we are headed next week.
I wanted to try and stay here in LA so badly, but we can only afford a studio apartment and no one will accept the three of us. I've been searching and searching for a place since we have to be out of our current apt. next week, but I can't come up with anything. It is frustrating and heartbreaking that no one wants to give us a chance and a home. They all say a studio would be too small for us but we know we could make it.
My husband has really been pushing for New Orleans so he can (hopefully) get back to work. We've visited the city many times and really like it a lot, but I never thought I could live there. I am scared of the crime and it just seems so dirty. I feel hopeless right now though, and like we have no other choice but to move. We have to go where the work is or we won't survive.
We're packing up to leave LA again and my heart is breaking once again. Have you ever tried to make it work over and over again in city you love but it just doesn't? The upside is that our families live in IL and WI, so we can easily drive up to see them. I don't fly so I have no idea how they will see our new baby anytime soon if we don't move within driving distance. Driving from LA to the Midwest takes days. My parents are older and my dad is in poor health, so I'd feel really bad if something happens before they meet our daughter.
Sorry I'm just rambling. I am upset right now and was wondering if anyone could relate to loving a city that just doesn't love you back.
Yes, I understand. South Florida doesn't love me back. Denver doesn't love me either, but for some twisted reason, it won't let me go...
New Orleans doesn't have to be forever you know. Try to keep that in mind and hang in there.
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I've been searching and searching for a place since we have to be out of our current apt. next week, but I can't come up with anything. It is frustrating and heartbreaking that no one wants to give us a chance and a home. They all say a studio would be too small for us but we know we could make it. 
new orleans is a very exciting place to live. there is so much culture and so much to do all the time. it is also exceptionally beautiful - the architecture and live oaks are breathtaking. people are extremely friendly and perfect strangers will say hi to you and offer you assistance if you need it. it's also very laid back which might be a great change of pace from LA. there are endless bars, art galleries, restaurants - everything you'd ever want, and it would take a lifetime to explore it all. it's a complicated city and it's not for everyone. if you can accept its flaws, i think it's a fine place to live.
