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I have done this several times...and make new friends. Just jump in. One thing...my kids have moved a few times. I think giving children new experiences is valuable. And gives them self efficacy. And helps them develop skills in making friends and adapting to change. Valuable life skills. I have a friend, who has not moved...and states that moving kids is terrible. My kids were not psychologically damaged by moving a few times. I think they have more ability to adapt to change....and less fear about change.
I have done this several times...and make new friends. Just jump in. One thing...my kids have moved a few times. I think giving children new experiences is valuable. And gives them self efficacy. And helps them develop skills in making friends and adapting to change. Valuable life skills. I have a friend, who has not moved...and states that moving kids is terrible. My kids were not psychologically damaged by moving a few times. I think they have more ability to adapt to change....and less fear about change.
I think the same thing! Many people told me to "stick it out" in my old area until my kids graduated from High School. That was two years ago and I didn't listen because the cost of living was becoming oppressive. It was way too stressful.
Flash forward to two years later. My son recently graduated from High School one month ago. He is still attending the rounds of graduation parties, and his was attended by over fifty friends. My daughter tried out for cheer and made the squad. She is a little more reserved when it comes to quantities of friends.
But she has several close one.
Kids are more resilient than one thinks, and I agree with Jasper that it helps children to learn coping skills and to be open to new people and new experiences.
Bottom line is, kids move where their families move and it is their parents who make such decisions. Friends come and go and a few friends stay. With family suport moving helps children learn that their identitiy is not ultimately tied up in a location.
People who are too connected to their school friends and home towns are often stuck - and miss chances to improve themselves because the are full of fear and misplaced loyalty.
Roots are wonderful! but wings help you to soar and to achieve.
The days of people living in one place from cradle to grave are over. I'm not sure that I am finished with my own journey. If you feel the need to move - seize the moment and go for it!
I'm 27 and moving to Atlanta not knowing a single person. I've found a roommate and we seem to get along, we've never met or anything but have similar interests. I'm a very outgoing person but it's hard to put in a bunch of time trying to meet people. I'm from CA and mostly moving for adventure, I think I'll eventually end up back here in CA but you only get one chance to explore. The worst thing that could happen is I end up moving home earlier than expected, will I feel like a failure? No, because at least I tried. If you're moving because you want to escape your life and start new that's a whole different story.
I've moved to places (usually across the country) where I didn't know a soul twice on my own and then twice with my spouse. It can be both scary and refreshing at the same time. Keep the phone numbers of close friends and family members handy in case you're ever feeling alone and need someone to talk to and give you perspective on your situation. I know I had times I felt like giving up on the moves at first sometimes, but I'm glad I stuck it out each of those times. I feel fortunate now to have friends and experiences from many different places around the country.
The more you get involved in activities you enjoy, the more likely you will be to meet people who share your interests and whom you enjoy spending time with.
I know the title may be a bit confusing, but I am set on leaving Buffalo once I graduate in May. Not 100% sure where yet, but I am looking at Knoxville, Lexington, Tulsa, OKC, and Cincinnati. At any rate, my parents live in Buffalo, but are relocating as well, the thing is they aren't sure where.
My whole family moved here when I was 17 from Canada, and none of us like Buffalo. My sister is in college in Florida. So basically, I am going to be moving somewhere where I don't know anyone at all. My other relatives all live in Canada, and I won't move back there, it's a nice place I just love the US too much to ever leave.
Does anyone have any advice on this? Is it tough to get connected with folks when you don't know anyone at all? I have great friends, and they are all leaving Buffalo too (it's a bad town for jobs)... so I don't know what to do.
I've always had many friends, but I know after college people settle down. Is it tough to find friends in a town when you know no one. I'm not afraid to get involved in social groups, I am active in my church, and active politically...
I am a male if that helps... Oh, and sorry if this is the wrong forum, it just seemed right. And another thing, "just don't move" isn't an option. Buffalo is a dying town, the average starting salary out of college for my field in Buffalo is $38,000, in other cities outside of NY, it is $49,000... not to mention my county is the 4th highest taxed (in aggregate) in the entire country. I am getting out of Buffalo, and moving to a more Conservative state... So that being said, what do I need to know? Anything to go for or to avoid? Any personal success stories?
Thanks...
Many times.
1980: moved from Syracuse to Phoenix AZ (for college. Had never been there. Didn't know a soul. Loved it!)
1984: moved from AZ to San Diego (after college. Had never been there. Didn't know a soul. Love it!)
1992: moved from SD to Tucson AZ (job related. Had never been there. Knew quite a few people that also moved. Hated it!)
1996: moved from AZ to Sacramento CA (had to get out of Tucson. Had never been there. Didn't know a soul. Loved it!)
2010: moved from CA to Fort Worth TX (economic climate made it tough to stay. Had never been there. Didn't know a soul. Love it!)
Yup, I have gypsy blood. In every move, I made friends right off the bat. The places that I've moved were all somewhat "transient" and most people had come from somewhere else, too. This last move has been the longest for making lots of friends, but not impossible (I put that down to moving somewhere where people have more roots, that I'm older, and that I'm kind of enjoying not having commitments).
How you'll handle it has a lot to do with you. My family thinks I'm nuts. My brother won't even go on vacation to a place he's never been before (?), let alone move somewhere. But I get restless after awhile. I love exploring different places and getting to know a new city.
1980: moved from Syracuse to Phoenix AZ (for college. Had never been there. Didn't know a soul. Loved it!)
1984: moved from AZ to San Diego (after college. Had never been there. Didn't know a soul. Love it!)
1992: moved from SD to Tucson AZ (job related. Had never been there. Knew quite a few people that also moved. Hated it!)
1996: moved from AZ to Sacramento CA (had to get out of Tucson. Had never been there. Didn't know a soul. Loved it!)
2010: moved from CA to Fort Worth TX (economic climate made it tough to stay. Had never been there. Didn't know a soul. Love it!)
Yup, I have gypsy blood. In every move, I made friends right off the bat. The places that I've moved were all somewhat "transient" and most people had come from somewhere else, too. This last move has been the longest for making lots of friends, but not impossible (I put that down to moving somewhere where people have more roots, that I'm older, and that I'm kind of enjoying not having commitments).
How you'll handle it has a lot to do with you. My family thinks I'm nuts. My brother won't even go on vacation to a place he's never been before (?), let alone move somewhere. But I get restless after awhile. I love exploring different places and getting to know a new city.
I call myself a professional gypsy. Most people ask us, after we move, when we're gonna move again. The funniest was this move, we had a nice older couple invite us in down the block of the place we initially rented. After we were there an hour, she said to me, "So, when is your next move planned"? And, they're both 86 or something. But, I think it's more about finding the right place or "home" for me. My friends think it's time for me to settle down. Hehe.
I agree, I've thrown a few things in the back of the SUV and driven across the country to someplace I haven't been. Sometimes a restart is the best thing.
About to turn 42 years old this year and relocating for the very first time, (if house sells of course). Lived in my home town my whole life minus the 4 yrs that I went away to college. Some friends and even family members think im stupid for waiting this long to do it...but I feel im in a good place and the mind is finally "right"..Paid off all of my debt/ no credit card debt and paid off car. And beside sometimes you really need a change of venue. I think for me, relocating will almost be therapeutic...It's really bad when you're beginning to hate everything about your hometown and you hear newcomers just rave about it. Been there done that to everything here. I don't have the 'grass is greener" syndrome. I know there will be some bumps along the way..but it will be the change that I so desire.
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