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I know this is an old post Lilyofthevalley but my environment (Tampa, FL) has been causing me misery off and on for the 8 years that I have lived here. I have a great job, closer to family but yet this almost constant heat makes me physically ill and I feel very depressed not having a change of season. My kids dont want to leave the place they've grown up but I cant seem to really adjust to this place. I grew up near DC and I hate that I cant seem to stop comparing the 2 places. They both have pro's and cons. Sigh, dont know what to do or where to go.
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Originally Posted by Lily0fthevalley
I'm surprised more people aren't saying how closely the environment in which they live really VERY MUCH affects their happiness.
In most of the forums I read there is constant discussion between rural and urban people, each insisting that their living environment choice is completely best and the other choice is terrible. And it is, for them.
For me, having lived in huge cities, small cities, small towns and rural areas, I can say that living in a place surrounded by asphalt and buildings with too many people and too much noise makes me MISERABLE, no matter how great other aspects of life are. Living in a place with a lot of green and very few people and minimal noise makes me HAPPY.
I know many people love the desert, but when I lived in a small desert town I was very very depressed, even though I loved my job and was in love. I have been MUCH happier in green places even when my social life was pretty dull.
I've lived in very humid areas, and was miserable much of the year. I am much happier in a dryer climate.
Extreme or even moderate heat makes me homicidal. Extreme cold weather is invigorating and makes me thrilled to be alive.
I know many people love living on the shores of oceans or lakes and need that in their lives. I couldn't care less about water.
Would I be happy in living in a hot humid city on the water (I just described Houston!) if the love of my life lived there? I doubt it!
Would I be happy living in a rural green cold environment if I didn't have any friends? Probably not, although since all of us gravitate towards people who share our personal views and choices I can't imagine living in an area like this and NOT having friends.
Maybe everyone isn't as influenced by their environment as I am?
Definitely, a big bulk of inner happiness depends on the people you surround yourself with. Rich or poor. This is in my experience anyway.
Feeling lonely in a beautiful/ideal place for a long period of time definitely won't render you happy. It's just that you'll never know what kind of people you'll meet...
I find with myself there is a major correlation between my location and happiness. I grew up in Northern Utah where the winter's are pretty cold and wet. As a teen I loved it because I could snowboard all winter and camp/hike all summer. Once I got into my early 20's I started resenting the cold and I moved to Southern California to be with my wife. While in California I felt a bit unhappy being away from friends at first, but once I made friends my wife wanted to give Utah a try as she has 2 kids and it has a better family structure (IMO.) Anyways, I didn't want to leave California by this point, I fell in love with the surf culture, the weather, the people... sure it was more expensive but thats for a reason. I definitely fit in better there as I'm not apart of the main religion in Utah and being away from my family that is apart of that religion was refreshing. Now I'm in Utah, and it's cold, and I'm surrounded by mormons. Currently trying to convince my wife to go back. Life is too short to live somewhere you aren't at your maximum capacity for potential happiness.
I think it does play a part. It really depends on the person and the situation.
I moved to OKC in the summer of 2012 and have had a difficult time being happy ever since. Thing is, the city just doesn't match my personality. It's a small city on the Great Plains without much in the way of natural recreation without having to drive at least an hour. It's also a very, very conservative place, so conservative it makes other cities that have a conservative reputation on City-Data look pretty liberal in comparison. The weather is probably the worst in the continental US and in terms of urban amenities and other things you would expect to find in a decent sized metro area, while its getting much better, it still punches far below its weight for a metro of 1.3 million people.
The city works well for a lot of people but it isn't for me and I have given it every chance I know how. I am certain I will be far happier when I can move elsewhere. It won't be a magic bullet that will fix everything as I have internal issues that also pertain to happiness, but where I live has been a big part of my unhappiness over the past 3 years.
How much is happiness determined by where you live?
For me, probably not a lot...well below average I guess. It's probably because I am able to travel a lot and because I never feel too rooted in one place...that is, I know that if I wanted to relocate I really have quite a bit of flexibility to allow me to settle somewhere else if I so choose. I also have friends and family all over the world so most places I might end up I'd at least have someone nearby to help me get acclimated, and I normally build my social and business networks in new places pretty easily.
That said, I do consider myself a "big city" person so I'd probably get really tired of a rural area after a few months and a suburban environment after a year or two.
This is an excellent thread. I am trying to get more in touch with myself, because it looks like we will be moving again in the foreseeable future.
I grew up in a remote area in the desert and loved it, but I can no longer take the heat. My teen years were spend in LA and I loved it, but by the time I was grown I just wanted out of the smog and congestion. I lived 40 years in northwest Indiana with my first hubby. It was ok but things were missing...rocks, hills and stars at night, and the air was bad and it was getting more and more congested. After first hubby passed I remarried. Second hubby and I both wanted out of the hot, humid summers in NW Indiana, so we moved near my daughter on the north coast of California. I think it's paradise. I have the ocean, mountains, rocks, stars at night, fresh air and a mild climate. My husband loves the nature but hates the town. He says there is nothing here. He has terrible allergies. We have to move. We have to move where he can get away from the allergies and find a better job. He likes cities. Cities come with bad air. I'm bummed. Where I live is everything. But I do miss fall colors. I really want to sit under a golden tree in the fall.
When I was in my twenties I loved the city but now that I'm in my sixties, I prefer a smaller town. Being currently in a very small town, I am not happy. There is absolutely nothing here.
I hope I find a town I'll fall in love with when I start traveling to check things out. Tonight it's really bad & we'll be having life threatening cold. I want to move out of this cold. Brrr
I can be happy anywhere. Home is where the heart is. Conversely, I was miserable living in Hawaii because of a person living in my home.
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