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I've read through a few different threads on here about what the best cities are for single guys, etc. I know not all the cities are good for software engineering jobs. I live on Long Island, and the female situation around here isn't the best, i.e. in my experience, they're not the most extroverted/friendliest women in the US.
I want to move away from here, have a fresh change of scenery, and a fresh change of people. Long Islanders can be pretty irritating, and tiring, and I don't feel I'm on the level of most people here. I'd rather be a stranger in a new land, and so I'll be looking to meet new people, especially female. Here's my critera for what I want in a new city:
1. Friendly/extroverted people, both genders, more preferrably female
2. Good night life, i.e. trains and bars don't stop at midnight
3. Decent tech market or at least a decent amount of corporations to fall back on if one doesn't work out
4. Cost of living cheaper than LI/NYC (shouldn't be hard to fulfill, lol)
5. Good food, although me being a foodie I can probably find good food in any city.
I've heard different things about certain cities, so here's my list of what cities I want to look into, and what I've heard about them. I encourage anyone to comment on any of these cities and correct me if I'm wrong, or recommend new cities I haven't thought of looking in to.
1. Boston - Nice city, no real ghetto areas, more chill than NYC, but nightlife can be iffy, less people than both Chicago and NYC, and bars tend to close around 1am
2. DC Area - Big tech area, but I hear trains stop around midnight so would suck if I resort to trains, although I do own a car. Nightlife I hear can be decent, but I'm not big on politics, so I don't want to mingle with a bunch of politicians if that's mostly who lives there.
3. Chicago - I love chicago, nice people, good food and beer, nice people (hell, girls come up and actually start a conversation with YOU sometimes, that never happens to me in LI) cons are some ghetto areas and the cold, and little to no tech field (aside from Groupon and Pandora really)
4. Philly - The amount of "nice" area is less than the amount of "bad" areas, although def. cheaper than NYC, and a gun state, so I'd love to go to a range every so often, seemingly more laid back than NY as a whole
5. Seattle - Overcast, which I don't mind, most coffee shops in the US, 3rd highest paying area for software engineers, but I hear it's in the middle of nowhere, and that the people are hit or miss and can tend to keep to themselves. Not sure about nightlife either.
6. Portland- I hear it has a growing tech field, I hear the food is good, I haven't heard much about the pay rate, cost of living, or the people and nightlife. I know one girl there who's fairly attractive and she said she's had the worst dates since she's gotten there, so I question how the women are in that city
7. Raleigh, NC- I hear it's another growing tech area, and I know it's dirt cheap for housing, but I don't know much about the people, the good/bad areas, and nightlife
8. Baltimore, MD - I know there's a really nice inner harbor, some decent suburbs outside the city, and some really crappy ghetto areas surrounding the inner harbor. It's got a fairly bad rap for crime and violence, but outside the city I'm open to suggestions for different towns to look at. Dont' know much about the nightlife, I know cost of living is cheap, the people seem friendly enough (have one friend down there and visited him at a party of his). Also not sure how the commuting situation is, if they have subways and such which I doubt, it's a seemingly small city. Also, I hear it's good for tech jobs, but I haven't seen much in the way of "tech"
SO yeah, that's a lot on my plate to think about. I'd rather stay on the east coast, so at least I have a fair chance of seeing my family, and not having to move all my crap across the country, but I'm not closed to the idea of living out there. If there was a city that's kinda like NYC only not as....dirty, crowded, and filled with friendlier people, that would be my ideal. NYC has its advantages, a pretty good metro system (despite rising MTA prices and such), tons of social places, huge nightlife, but I really think I mesh better with people who are out of state, so I figured me being a New Yorker somewhere else can always have its advantages, plus chicks dig the accent . Anyway, thanks ahead of time, hoping to get at least a few replies on advice. Leaving the table open.
I think you're best bet given all of your criteria is going to be Boston. It's going to feel more like what you're accustomed to culturally and socially, still has the great food scene, decent nightlife despite the 1am thing which you'll probably be outgrowing before too long anyway, has a strong tech economy with great salaries and more extroverted, friendlier people in my opinion than NY. The cost of living will be a smidge less but given your potential salary, not a problem most likely.
What about moving to another part of the NYC area? I was thinking of maybe Rockland County, as Nyack has a nice nightlife scene. Perhaps parts of NJ too.
Boston or Chicago stand out the most to me, based on your criteria. Chicago especially, and I don't think there is any shortage of tech/engineering related jobs in the region. Philly could also work.
May I just add that you will probably never have to deal with a city's bad neighborhoods, and crime is 90% of the time non-random. I'm not saying crime rates aren't an important way to measure safety and quality of living, but crime in places like Chicago or Philly should not deter you from living there because you'll rarely encounter it, especially as a single person who plans on living in some hip neighborhood -- at least, neither city are night-and-day different than what you're used to in NYC.
It sounds like your primary reason for moving is for dating prospects. What if you go through the hassle of making such a big move to a new city, and then you still have trouble meeting quality girls? Then what? Will you move to another city?
As a tech worker and part time DT Raleigh resident, I can weigh in here.
Raleigh's a great place for young engineers. It's certainly less expensive than Long Island but it's not super cheap in the areas where you'd probably want to live.
While the majority of the tech industry is in RTP (in the burbs between Raleigh and Durham), the trend now is to move downtown for both working and living. I expect that trend to continue. RedHat is HQ'd DT http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedi...ersRaleigh.jpg and Citrix is opening a site and hiring in the Warehouse District of DT. http://farm6.staticflickr.com/5484/1...8e1516c4_o.jpghttp://farm4.static.flickr.com/3688/...3428156e_m.jpg
Raleigh's bars stop serving at 2:00 AM but unlike MA and CA they don't yank the drink out of your hand that you buy at 1:59AM. Some dance places stay open later and serve non-alcoholic drinks after two and give patrons a chance to "sober up" before leaving. Bar/venue hopping is pretty easy among the 5 DT Districts by foot and the weekend nights are pretty busy with bars, dance clubs, live music venues and micro/craft breweries. These venues too seem to open monthly and build upon each others' successes.
Raleigh does not have trains/rail (yet) but most of the emerging neighborhoods where young professionals live are either walking distance to clubs or a short (and free) loop bus ride home in DT via the RLine which runs until 2:00AM. Bike rickshaws are also a transportation option.
DT Raleigh always seems to be continuously building and opening hundreds of new DT rental units. Before one opens, another one is under construction because it's growing that fast. As the building at 425 N Boylan nears completion, Skyhouse http://www.reprehensible.net/~orulz/skyhouse.jpg has broken ground. There are several others in the wings that have been approved and it seems as if developers are "in line" for when they are going to break ground to deliver new housing units in concurrence with the growing demand.
Raleigh is a very young and educated city/metro. There are lots of opportunities for young singles to mingle and find dates/partners/spouses.
It sounds like your primary reason for moving is for dating prospects. What if you go through the hassle of making such a big move to a new city, and then you still have trouble meeting quality girls? Then what? Will you move to another city?
I get what you're saying NEP, and while it's not a primary reason, it's equal to some other reasons to leave. What it comes down to is I have 3 options:
1. Move out of state, try a different area, see some new people and some new locations
2. Move west into queens (I'm in Suffolk currently, 1 hour train ride each way to NYC), get an apt, and work in NYC
3. Buy a house, and seemingly be forever locked in to LI.
Family is really the only thing keeping me on LI, and after living with them 30 years, it's really just time to be away for a while. I'm fairly independent, although not introverted, I just need more privacy and space for all my hobbies and side jobs.
Dating would be important, because I've been single 8 years here, and I don't feel like I'm finding anything worthwhile around here. Anywhere I've been outside of LI/NYC, women have been MUCH more responsive and easier to talk to. Granted, I'm fairly extroverted, I could meet someone anywhere, but I've liked what little response I've gotten in Chicago, Columbus, OH, and Baltimore, for some examples. People in general just seem a lot less weirded out when some stranger starts talking to them outside of this area.
Now, back to your question, if I have the same crap luck elsewhere, at least there are other pros: a. cleaner and less busy city, b. cheaper cost of living, c. surrounded by new people and things to do.
I get what you're saying NEP, and while it's not a primary reason, it's equal to some other reasons to leave. What it comes down to is I have 3 options:
1. Move out of state, try a different area, see some new people and some new locations
2. Move west into queens (I'm in Suffolk currently, 1 hour train ride each way to NYC), get an apt, and work in NYC
3. Buy a house, and seemingly be forever locked in to LI.
Family is really the only thing keeping me on LI, and after living with them 30 years, it's really just time to be away for a while. I'm fairly independent, although not introverted, I just need more privacy and space for all my hobbies and side jobs.
Dating would be important, because I've been single 8 years here, and I don't feel like I'm finding anything worthwhile around here. Anywhere I've been outside of LI/NYC, women have been MUCH more responsive and easier to talk to. Granted, I'm fairly extroverted, I could meet someone anywhere, but I've liked what little response I've gotten in Chicago, Columbus, OH, and Baltimore, for some examples. People in general just seem a lot less weirded out when some stranger starts talking to them outside of this area.
Now, back to your question, if I have the same crap luck elsewhere, at least there are other pros: a. cleaner and less busy city, b. cheaper cost of living, c. surrounded by new people and things to do.
I understand. I'm 29 and have been living in CT my entire life, except for two years in NYC after college. Unlike you, I'm introverted, however, but still want a relationship. Both CT and NYC are not good for meeting anyone worth dating. I'm gay, but that's besides the point...it's the same for anyone, gay or straight. Most people just seem settled into their family or something. I have not bought a house myself either, because I'm afraid of being anchored down.
Chicago is nice, as long as you don't mind big city living. It's extremely cold in the winter and windy, though. Columbus, OH is actually very nice. I have considered moving there. There are lots of young people (it's a college town) and it's cheap to live there. It's a Midwestern cultured city, however, so you'd have to get used to the culture. Baltimore would probably be the least culture shock, but I don't know much about it.
I would avoid Boston at all costs. People are very reserved, provincial and stick with their close circle of friends.
But the reality is that the hardest part is finding a job and convincing employers to give your resume a look and convincing them to believe that you're committed to making the move and staying there for a substantial period of time. I have had phone interviews with a few employers in Dallas and Fort Lauderdale and Las Vegas, to name a few. They ask you questions such as "have you ever been here?" "do you have family or friends in the area?" "why are you interested in moving here?" They will be prying for reasons, so you need to be comfortable and prepared with explaining that. I'm not saying that it won't work out, but it's just much harder to be taken seriously than a local candidate. Of course, moving somewhere with no job is a huge risk, unless you have a LOT of cash saved up. I'm talking at least $50-100K. And your field had better be in demand in that area.
I understand. I'm 29 and have been living in CT my entire life, except for two years in NYC after college. Unlike you, I'm introverted, however, but still want a relationship. Both CT and NYC are not good for meeting anyone worth dating. I'm gay, but that's besides the point...it's the same for anyone, gay or straight. Most people just seem settled into their family or something. I have not bought a house myself either, because I'm afraid of being anchored down.
Chicago is nice, as long as you don't mind big city living. It's extremely cold in the winter and windy, though. Columbus, OH is actually very nice. I have considered moving there. There are lots of young people (it's a college town) and it's cheap to live there. It's a Midwestern cultured city, however, so you'd have to get used to the culture. Baltimore would probably be the least culture shock, but I don't know much about it.
I would avoid Boston at all costs. People are very reserved, provincial and stick with their close circle of friends.
But the reality is that the hardest part is finding a job and convincing employers to give your resume a look and convincing them to believe that you're committed to making the move and staying there for a substantial period of time. I have had phone interviews with a few employers in Dallas and Fort Lauderdale and Las Vegas, to name a few. They ask you questions such as "have you ever been here?" "do you have family or friends in the area?" "why are you interested in moving here?" They will be prying for reasons, so you need to be comfortable and prepared with explaining that. I'm not saying that it won't work out, but it's just much harder to be taken seriously than a local candidate. Of course, moving somewhere with no job is a huge risk, unless you have a LOT of cash saved up. I'm talking at least $50-100K. And your field had better be in demand in that area.
You kidding dude? NYC is one of the best places for you if you're looking for a partner. It has to be one of the most tolerant cities at this point, and one of the biggest PRIDE scenes too. Heck, I'm surprised you'd have an issue finding people in this area. If anything the people are a bit more fast paced, that I get, but socially it's a pretty tolerant place I like to think. Even introverted you could always hit up people on OKCupid or something, I'm sure possibilities are endless for you.
Chicago I've only been to in winter for the German Christmas festival and I like it. I don't feel there are a lot of big companies there that require software engineers though. Google and Facebook are there, but their postings show no requirements for engineers in their Chicago offices, mostly just NYC and Cali. If it had a bigger tech field, I'd be living there already, I've never or hardly ever at best seen an unattractive girl in Chicago. Goose Island is awesome, the burgers are awesome, and the pizza is pretty good too, although I can't have a whole pie, lol. Heck even the one breakfast spot Yolk, all the waitresses seem like they're model quality.
As far as Boston goes, I have yet to take a road trip up there, but I didn't think the people are more reserved. If anything, that's something that can be said about my current town. I've lived here 8 years and the two girls across the street from me in their 20's still don't bother to try hanging out. I've heard in this town, people really don't give you the time of day unless you've went to school with them or something, but it's a fairly spoiled rich kid town anyway.
Regarding interview questions, as I said, I'm fairly independent, I want to try a new place before I settle down. I think coming from NYC area if anything gives me an advantage, since this is one of the most hard working areas in the country, so time will tell on that one.
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. Anyway, thanks ahead of time, hoping to get at least a few replies on advice. Leaving the table open.
