Are people in your city friendly and welcoming to outsiders or transplants or do they give you the cold shoulder? (houses)

[Trabbz]

After reading multiple posts on this forum, something struck me as odd. I grew up in the midwest and find that people there are very friendly and love to meet new people. However, numerous transplants to the midwest have posted on this website that people there are unfriendly to outsiders and making new friends is difficult.

I have lived in the Tampa Bay area for years and find it is suprisingly difficult to make friends here. Sure, if I want to party til all hours of the morning (which I do like doing), I can find plenty of crazy party people that will go out every weekend. But I find that finding good friends to do other non-alcoholic activities to be difficult.

I have considered moving to Atlanta. I am curious, what's it like in your area?

[dxiweodwo]

people here are very freindly to outsiders, at least i know i am.

[Dave1215]

Generally known as a very friendly place.

[OREGONRAIN]

Originally Posted by Trabbz

After reading multiple posts on this forum, something struck me as odd. I grew up in the midwest and find that people there are very friendly and love to meet new people. However, numerous transplants to the midwest have posted on this website that people there are unfriendly to outsiders and making new friends is difficult.

I have lived in the Tampa Bay area for years and find it is suprisingly difficult to make friends here. Sure, if I want to party til all hours of the morning (which I do like doing), I can find plenty of crazy party people that will go out every weekend. But I find that finding good friends to do other non-alcoholic activities to be difficult.

I have considered moving to Atlanta. I am curious, what's it like in your area?

I know how you feel, I feel the same way in Portland. However Portland is very different that the rest of the USA. Heavy emphasis on alternative this that and he other, and its motto is KEEP PORTLAND WEIRD, they are not joking on that one. I find the midwest and much of the south more friendly, but the south can be iffy beyond the casual friendliness to someone that is not a native. The Tampa area is made up of people from all over, and I have been there enough to understand what you mean. You probably are someone that is more conditioned to living in a more stable not so transient place ,where interaction with others is more common place. I am from New England originally and it like the midwest is not so transient and we get to know each other more easily I think. I don't know why you would think a city like Atlanta would be better, but I guess you know the answer to that one.

[suncat]

Yep. Portland likes to think of itself as friendly, but it's actually cold and smug.

[cpg35223]

You know, I always take responses on these threads with a grain of salt, having lived in Chicago, Cleveland, Baltimore, San Diego, and Birmingham.

All are way different cities with very different cultures. Yet we've never had a problem making friends in any of these places. For example, moving to Birmingham, I met several fellow northerners who said, "Oh, these Southerners are cliquish. You'll never make friends here. I'm moving back as soon as I can." Yet, 16 years later, we have a very wide range of friends from all walks of life.

In short, I'm less inclined to blame the culture than to question how individual posters interact with others. My wife and I are people persons. We like to talk to people. We reach out to others and invite them over for drinks or dinner. If we meet somebody new, we like to introduce them to other people in our social circle and help them find people in common with one another. So we're known for throwing a bitchin' party. Our friends include Southerners, Northerners, business people, artsy people, country club types, whites, blacks, Asians, and the list goes on. We get invited to parties, beach houses, etc. etc. etc.

I'm not writing all that to pat ourselves on the back. Rather, I'm saying that we moved to a town without knowing a soul, and steadily accumulated some great friendships in a relatively short time. So here's my question for you if you've moved to a town that you feel is unwelcoming:

1) Do you like people? I mean, do you really, really like meeting new people? Do you like learning about where people come from and what makes them tick? Are you more interested in talking about them than talking about yourself? That's the Numero Uno key to engaging people in conversation.

2) Do you reach out to others? I don't mean occasionally inviting somebody to lunch. Do you make it a habit to hit somebody up for lunch or drinks or have them over for dinner? After all, making friends is work.

3) Can you budge out of your comfort zone? Being a northerner, I found these Southerners a bit odd a first. But that's half the fun. If we were all alike, then cocktail parties would be very dull indeed.

4) Do you like to try new things? Heck, I never thought about fishing before. But, when invited, I said, "Sure, I'll give it a try." And I made sure they knew I was grateful for being invited. And I repaid them for their hospitality. I'm amazed at the number of people we've met in Birmingham who whined about not making friends, yet THEY NEVER LEAVE THEIR HOUSES. The only friends you're going to make that way are Amway Salesman, Fuller Brush salesmen, and the occasional Mormon or Jehova's Witness missionary.

[DannyBanany]

Rapid City relies on tourism for money, so people here are very nice to outsiders. I think most people get irked by the West Coast and East Coast retirees who move out here and cause property taxes to increase and try to bring their lifestyles with them.

I actually love tourists though!