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Maybe just return to Arizona? It takes a big change, sometimes in the wrong direction, to know what you originally had. I wish you luck. I could write a book about relocations.
Moved to Knoxville (Farragut/Concord/Northshore Area) in April from Mesa, AZ in hopes of giving our boys 8 & 5 the opportunity to grow up with nature in a place that is green, soft and full of life. We did over a year of research on the Knoxville area and decided it was a good fit, putting aside many of the stereotypes we read about in other reviews. Now that we are here we are finding that sadly many of them are true.
The terrain and weather here are unrivaled and so beautiful that we fell in love instantly. We pinch ourselves when we look outside at the beautiful trees and feel the cool breezes. The weather is exactly what we want, a great variety of clouds, cool showers and sun but that's where our comfort stops.
We have found in our short time here that the local population has not had that southern hospitality that we read about. Instead, the individuals we have dealt with have been outright rude and disingenuous save for a few exceptions with other transplants.
The drivers are not the laid back slower pace of life that we read about either. They are aggressive and tailgate incessantly which is dangerous and nerve-wracking on these old single lane roads.
The infrastructure is also very dated. There is no grid system and most roads are single lane, no or few reflectors and poorly lit.
The electrical grid is a tangled web of above ground wires. There are very few actual traffic lights on poles and street signs at major intersections are tiny residential size signs in places that are not highly visible. It's hard to find your way without gps.
The food service we have encountered has been terrible as well and very little customer service to fix issues. We have never see such apathy before.
The parks and lakes are beautiful but we found out after our son's each caught their first bass in Ft Loudon lake that the lake is polluted with (PCBs) in it's entirety, they could not be kept and eaten! Apparently there are advisories on some 30-40% of the water bodies in TN.
After all of this we are sad and confused on where to go. Is there an clean, developed, educated, welcoming place anywhere around here?
We are considering neighbor states AR & NC. I've read NC is very focused on education and tech but don't know anything about the weather or culture. We want to stay close to mountains so not the coast.
This sounds like culture shock. It's only been a month. You could have moved from AZ to NM and you would feel the same at this point. The roads you drive are different, the routines, the familiar faces....all different.
What you described of Knoxville is somewhat true of the south. Customer service sucks, you have no grid system, and 2 lane roads.
But you could just as well focus on the positives. Great weather, greenery, roads that all look different, no state income tax, mountains nearby, etc.
I have found that when we move, our brain tries to create this sort of "Franken-city" that is the best of where you came from combined with where you moved to that sets a new unrealistic bar as a good place to live.......obviously it doesn't exist.
When we moved to Atlanta from the Twin Cities, we missed the grid system, 4 lane roads, traffic light posts, parks, sidewalks, etc. I'll just be honest, my wife got acclimated in 3 months....it took me a solid 18 months. But hang in there. Another move won't solve these ills, you just need time.
In the meantime....live like a tourist. Explore all Knoxville has to offer, go hiking every weekend. Call your loved ones back home on a regular basis. Encourage friends and family to visit you. Best of luck
The population of Arizona is very transient, which presents concerns when raising children. For example, people from Arizona do not typically have friends from high school, and they certainly do not have friends from elementary school. However, I am quite certain that most people in Tennessee have friends from high school with whom they are in regular contact (as full-grown adults). In my opinion, the six degrees of separation in Arizona presents other concerns, such as low social capital, voter apathy, community disengagement, etc. Essentially, the social issues of metropolitan areas like Phoenix are deleterious to child and adolescent outcomes, which is why most 25-year-olds in Arizona are uneducated and earn $15.00/hour.
The population of Arizona is very transient, which presents concerns when raising children. For example, people from Arizona do not typically have friends from high school, and they certainly do not have friends from elementary school. However, I am quite certain that most people in Tennessee have friends from high school with whom they are in regular contact (as full-grown adults). In my opinion, the six degrees of separation in Arizona presents other concerns, such as low social capital, voter apathy, community disengagement, etc. Essentially, the social issues of metropolitan areas like Phoenix are deleterious to child and adolescent outcomes, which is why most 25-year-olds in Arizona are uneducated and earn $15.00/hour.
No offense to Tennessee, but it's a typical southern state.
Voter apathy, community disengagement, low wages, poor education... that describes much of the southeast, especially the parts that are the least transient. The places with the most newcomers are the most likely to not be that.
Arizona would be an improvement for a lot of people.
In order to warm up to the south, a person really needs to forget their preconceived notions about how things are supposed to look and feel.
They need to fully embrace the situation they find themselves in.
Southerners aren't prone to paying much attention to outside suggestions.
Life's too short to be stuck in a place that's not working out though.
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