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Why did you have children if you can't afford them?
They are not my responsibility. I can't afford to feed them any more than you can.
I see many situations in which an unmarried woman is on welfare and continues to have children so I understand where your question is coming from. But understand that peoples financial circumstances do change. One may have been able to afford children when they had them but due to divorce, sickness, job loss, etc. find themselves in a tough financial spot.
When my first child was little, I was going to school and working part time and my husband was temporarily laid off from his job. That was the one and only time we used food stamps and it was only for a couple months until he went back to work. I eventually got my B.S. and a good job. I worked all but about 1year in the past 35 years since the dreaded food stamp months, raised 2 children and have 2 grandchildren, and pay in more taxes than some make. I hope no one judged me and wondered what business I had having a child.
No father in the household is the surest route to poverty. That's a fact.
I have heard that a household with children but only one parent will receive greater benefits.
Anybody know if this is true or just a myth?
If it's indeed true, is it a good thing to make it more monetarily rewarding to not have a father present?
(I did a real quick Google search on whether single parent homes receive more in assistance payments, but I couldn't find a reliable source. I'll do another search later if nobody else can provide any trustworthy looking information. BTW, please provide a link if you answer this question)
About 10 years ago, I ran our local food shelf. I saw the faces of the people in our community who came for help. We had the ones who tried to get everything they can but the majority of them were embarrassed to ask.
There was one day, there was this woman who came in almost every week. I told her that she needed to see our director because maybe our director could help her with budget planning or something like that. She raised a fit that she was being refused. She wasn't being refused. I said that she just needed to see our director-that didn't mean she wasn't going to get food. She stormed out without food. The guy standing behind her in line said that he saw that she wasn't being refused and would testify if need be. He said that he just needed diapers. He then told me that he ate every other day so that his wife & kids could eat. Needless to say, he walked out with more than just diapers. I saw the look on his face-he was so grateful but yet, he was embarrassed to be in the situation he was in. We ran the gamut that one day. But overall, there were more people like that guy than there were like that woman who used the food shelf.
People need to remember that things like SS, food stamps and welfare programs were originally created to protect widows and their children. The ones who actually need it, remember them?
Food stamps for families with a perfectly good, healthy man in the house? That's an idea I cannot get behind.
Why do some people take every opportunity to verbally attack people on assistance? I am constantly reading posts on forums and social sites that indicate that anyone one welfare or food stamps is a greedy, lazy freeloader.
That is not the case. As a single mom of two children, we are on welfare. I work 40-50 hours a week in addition to maintaining a household and raising children.
I know way more people that work full time and get assistance, then I know that do not work and get assistance. Help me understand.
I get people being upset about fraud and freeloaders. It is a real problem. It doesn't sit well with me either. But I wouldn't worry about trying to understand what makes no sense. When people start in with the vomitus about how they are paying the way for these folks, griping at them for having an iphone and paying with an EBT card, what they're wearing, what they have in their shopping carts, it's just sheer buffoonery.
You're working full time. So, according to these folks, if you're paying taxes, you are paying into the benefits you're receiving. They can mind their business. I'm sure they'll think of something else to gripe about though.
Quote:
Originally Posted by thefragile
^^^not to mention that if the person instead saw actual vegetables in the cart instead of crap junk food, they'd complain that food stamp users are eating fresh vegetables when they themselves can't afford it. How much do you want to bet that is exactly what would be said?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ohiogirl81
Good point! That is exactly what would happen.
Heaven forbid if any of that produce were organic.
Yeah, because people on welfare should eat crap, processed food. That would make everyone happy.
If someone wants to spend their entire food stamp benefit on lobster and steak or organic products, they had better make sure they can stretch it or they will starve for the rest of the month. People who aren't on welfare are free to do the same.
When I hear stuff like this, I really think it's a matter of misery loves company. If you're on welfare, you need to look the part, dress the part, live and eat like a vagrant in order to please these folks. In Texas, a single person with no kids can receive $175 a month (give or take) in food stamps. It helps, but it's not a like you'd be eating like a king. How many of you would be willing to give up the 'luxuries' that you purchased with your hard earned money before you lost your jobs for $175 a month, to please a bunch of strangers who really don't matter?
When people start in with the vomitus about how they are paying the way for these folks, griping at them for having an iphone and paying with an EBT card, what they're wearing, what they have in their shopping carts, it's just sheer buffoonery.
An iPhone is a luxury. An expensive purse is a luxury. When you can't afford to feed your family, sodas are a luxury.
Buffoonery is saying that people who can't feed themselves are entitled to an iPhone.
Sell that dang iPhone for $200 and buy a used $10 phone to replace it and use that $190 for your family.
This belief system is, in absolute terms, a failure since it cannot stand up to critical analysis, yet it continues to exist. Part of it is rooted in our Puritan past, as well as misguided notions about God and the supposed "infinite justice" he will provide to the world.
In short, the Just World Fallacy assumes that "everyone gets what they deserve in life."
Now, one can shoot huge holes in this nutty belief system with little effort. Does a starving child born in poverty "deserve" to live a short life full of pain and then to die very young? Of course not! Does a wealthy sleazebag criminal "deserve" to live a long life of luxury? Of course not! And yet, many still buy into this belief system for several reasons.
First, by assuming "everyone gets what they deserve in life," it becomes very easy for a successful person to take full credit for their good fortune. Now, sure, that person may have worked hard for their success, but there was also luck involved: the family into which they were born, their health, etc. In reality, there is no such thing as the entirely self-made man, but most of us wouldn't have to walk a block in this nation to find people who truly believe that they alone are responsible for their success.
The dark corollary to this is that anyone who is NOT successful must "deserve" their misfortune. That guy who was laid off and found that his career field evaporated leaving him unemployable? Well, he "deserved it" - even though he worked just as hard as the people who are still employed and has basically the same skills. That impoverished welfare recipient who works as many hours as she can get on poverty wages? She "deserves" nothing because in the crazy, judgmental eyes of Just World believers, she is "lazy" and "worthless," and it is "all her fault" - nevermind the poverty into which she was born, the non-existent family, etc.
Those who buy into the Just World Fallacy are usually the most judgmental people out there and are completely lacking in both empathy and self-realization regarding how they actually achieved their success in life - they are not completely self-made, as they would like to believe. Unfortunately, the Just World Fallacy is heavily promoted in far-right wing religious groups as being an upgraded version of "God's Love / Wrath" - (see also the Prosperity Gospel) as well as being heavily supported by the rich who run the nation. They want more people to believe in the Just World Fallacy since its circular logic - "people always get what they deserve" - means that the rich by default "deserve" all their wealth, no matter how many they harmed to get it, while the working class and poor "deserve" little to nothing. Every working class individual who believes in a Just World is basically supporting a viewpoint that works against their own self-interests as well as that of their fellow working class people.
Last edited by Rambler123; 04-16-2014 at 10:35 AM..
One could also ask why so many go to college but cannot afford to pay for it without loans and grants.
The amount of student loan debt is staggering and the amount of student loan defaults is even more.
A lot of us have been put into positions of financial distress because of the actions of someone else and I would venture to guess that the original poster was in a different situation when those children were born.
I would be guessing though since I do not know for sure.
When one is left with no money, no job and everything that can be pawned taken so the other can go and play with their underage playmate there is no way they can take care of themselves and their child properly without some sort of help. Hopefully it can be temporary and they will stop getting the help from welfare as soon as they can manage on their own.
Since your post quoted mine, let me address your concern.
I agree.
I paid my way through college. My parents paid for my first year; after that, I was on my own. I worked and I studied. Not much time to party, but that wasn't why I was there.
There should be NO, as in ZERO tax funded college loans. None!
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