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It just happened that some of us have our own mating preferences, I am a chinese male and grow up in China, I was never attracted to any asian women since childhood. I don't sexually fantasize about asian women no matter how much japanese porns I watched. I love white women, and I don't feel guilty to announce that my relation goal is to pair with a white woman, the one with blonde hair and blue/green eyes. My parents don't agree with me, they want their grandchildren to be full Manchu chinese. Too bad for them, I don't even feel comfortable to be around with asians girls ( doesn't matter if they are chinese, japanes, korean or Asian americans/Canadians), I am prefectly ok with elder asians ladies and children . but not the ones in their 20s and 30s. So if I am going to get married, my wife has to be a white woman or at least Latino or Persian. I don't want a sexless marriage and end up cheating on my wife.
I also don't have any problem with Asian girls who marry outside their race, as I myself exclusively date white women. What I really hate to hear and see is many of them deprecate their asian male counterparts and their native culture to justify their racial preference. I am not attracted to asian girls so I just keeping a wider social distance with them, most of the time, I could careless whoabout they are dating, as long as they are leaving me alone.
I don't even feel comfortable to be around with asians girls
Not being attracted to someone is one thing, but I find it quite fascinating that you are not even comfortable around the people with whom you grew up, with whom you share a race and a culture.
But this isn't the Psychology forum, so I guess I'll just have to wonder about it from afar . . .
I had to look at both these studies again and from I gather it basically tells us that black men/non-black women couples are the least likely to last and white male/Asian/white/black,Hispanic women pairings do much better. The stat that jumps out from the Stanford study is that out of 1,000 mixed black children 92% were born out of wedlock and over 90% of these kids have no support from their black fathers. That is worse than black children who are born out of wedlock 73% of the time. That stat blew my mind.
I had to look at both these studies again and from I gather it basically tells us that black men/non-black women couples are the least likely to last and white male/Asian/white/black,Hispanic women pairings do much better. The stat that jumps out from the Stanford study is that out of 1,000 mixed black children 92% were born out of wedlock and over 90% of these kids have no support from their black fathers. That is worse than black children who are born out of wedlock 73% of the time. That stat blew my mind.
This "research " probably wouldn't qualify as such by any stretch of the imagination. The participants were "recruited" she no doubt turn some away. Any one would ask ,'why didn't the "researcher" use data already available like census and population records?" Probably because she already knew what the results she was looking were going to be before she recruited the participants.
I myself am publishing a paper, being inspired by Tiffany Calloway I talked to 10 people today and found them to be jerks all except 1. I have surmised that 90% of the population are jerks.
I myself am publishing a paper, being inspired by Tiffany Calloway I talked to 10 people today and found them to be jerks all except 1. I have surmised that 90% of the population are jerks.
Your methodology is flawed. The one non-jerk you spoke with actually IS a jerk, sometimes; you just caught him on a good day.
So a correct conclusion would be that 95% of the population are jerks.
I can't speak for all black people, but my understanding is that because black men are looked down upon and beat down upon by society, it is felt that it is our obligation to stay with them to help support them morally, physically, emotionally, spiritually, etc. Many of us are seen as traitors if we date white men.
I remember when I was in college many years ago..I had a friend who was a drop dead gorgeous woman. Not only that, but she was extremely smart and such a sweet person. She was black. Well, many guys approached her and tried to date her. But in the end, she chose a guy who treated her like a queen...he baked cookies, carried her books, and just treated her like a queen. He was white. The african american guys on campus talked about her so badly, and many were hostile to her, saying that she was a "traitor" for not dating a black man.
In terms of why it's not the same with black men/white women, that's another issue altogether, lol. It's quite complex, and by no means can be summed up on what I'll write below. But this is just a piece of the issue..: Unfortunately, black women are viewed as being on the bottom of the totem pole in the United States (looks wise, education wise, etc). Additionally, we are often portrayed as amazonian, angry, hostile, in-your-face, loud, confrontational, emasculating, etc. And so sometimes men believe that because of this perception, and also because they have bought into the long held perception that white women are the creme-de-la-creme in terms of beauty and femininity, they owe it to themselves to seek them out.
The double standard is clear.
I have to offer a rebuttal to clear the air for the non-blacks in here, because clearly, the perceptions on this topic from non-blacks in this thread are lacking substance. Like you, I am not a spokesman for the entire black community/experience, but yes, I am speaking as a black man...
First, while many black women are dragged through the mud for dating outside of race, please do not act like the reverse isn't also true. Black men "get it" from every side, and certainly from black women, when we date non-black. So that same dynamic of being labeled traitorous, self-hating, etc, goes for both sexes. There is no double standard...
What can't be overstated has barely been mentioned here, and that is that most blacks of the millennial generation and younger are EXTREMELY open to interracial dating. I get the sense that you're a lot older than me...I'm 26. So really, besides my comment above, I've found that these issues of dislike of interracial dating in the younger black community is minor. Oh, I've met people my age who fit the discussion we're having--what I'm saying is that isn't a normal occurrence. I think this was a bigger issue in past generations...
While I will agree that black men also view black women as the least desirable of women, I want to add that black men are physically attracted to and WILLING to be in a relationship with ALL women, no matter her race or ethnicity. In fact, I'd even venture to say that black American men or the most acceptable of interracial dating than our counterparts in any corner of the world, and certainly in America. No other race is as acceptable to dating black women, even admitting that our treatment of black women also shows we desire them least. White men may desire East Asian women more, but black men desire South Asians much more....
Everybody is attracted to white women, so that's a draw, in my estimation. White men have a facade of desiring Hispanic women, but only if they are white. Black men desire Hispanics regardless of racial makeup. Black men love Indian and Middle Eastern women, and are attracted to women of foreign nationality at least as much as any of our counterparts....my point is to kill this myth that black men desire white women as a symbol of status or achievement. That's baloney. Black men will date a woman of any background faster than any other man will, and, at least here in America, are physically desired (you can say listed) after by a more diverse palette of women than any other group of men...
Nothing I say should be read as if there are no individual exceptions, because there are more than enough of those if one chooses to find. I'm speaking as the general rule, majority in our culture...
As far as the stats on unwed black/mixed black children, I have no argument there. Facts are facts, although I'm a huge believer in that one can bend statistics and skew them however they want to emphasize their point. I digress...
I have to offer a rebuttal to clear the air for the non-blacks in here, because clearly, the perceptions on this topic from non-blacks in this thread are lacking substance. Like you, I am not a spokesman for the entire black community/experience, but yes, I am speaking as a black man...
First, while many black women are dragged through the mud for dating outside of race, please do not act like the reverse isn't also true. Black men "get it" from every side, and certainly from black women, when we date non-black. So that same dynamic of being labeled traitorous, self-hating, etc, goes for both sexes. There is no double standard...
What can't be overstated has barely been mentioned here, and that is that most blacks of the millennial generation and younger are EXTREMELY open to interracial dating. I get the sense that you're a lot older than me...I'm 26. So really, besides my comment above, I've found that these issues of dislike of interracial dating in the younger black community is minor. Oh, I've met people my age who fit the discussion we're having--what I'm saying is that isn't a normal occurrence. I think this was a bigger issue in past generations...
While I will agree that black men also view black women as the least desirable of women, I want to add that black men are physically attracted to and WILLING to be in a relationship with ALL women, no matter her race or ethnicity. In fact, I'd even venture to say that black American men or the most acceptable of interracial dating than our counterparts in any corner of the world, and certainly in America. No other race is as acceptable to dating black women, even admitting that our treatment of black women also shows we desire them least. White men may desire East Asian women more, but black men desire South Asians much more....
Everybody is attracted to white women, so that's a draw, in my estimation. White men have a facade of desiring Hispanic women, but only if they are white. Black men desire Hispanics regardless of racial makeup. Black men love Indian and Middle Eastern women, and are attracted to women of foreign nationality at least as much as any of our counterparts....my point is to kill this myth that black men desire white women as a symbol of status or achievement. That's baloney. Black men will date a woman of any background faster than any other man will, and, at least here in America, are physically desired (you can say listed) after by a more diverse palette of women than any other group of men...
Nothing I say should be read as if there are no individual exceptions, because there are more than enough of those if one chooses to find. I'm speaking as the general rule, majority in our culture...
As far as the stats on unwed black/mixed black children, I have no argument there. Facts are facts, although I'm a huge believer in that one can bend statistics and skew them however they want to emphasize their point. I digress...
LOL studies show both black men and women to be the less desired and this comes from studies of dating apps such Facebook's "Are you interested?", Tinder and OK Cupid that prove this.
"In terms of the lowest response rate, women appeared to shun black men, whereas men tended to shun black women."
I have to offer a rebuttal to clear the air for the non-blacks in here, because clearly, the perceptions on this topic from non-blacks in this thread are lacking substance. Like you, I am not a spokesman for the entire black community/experience, but yes, I am speaking as a black man...
First, while many black women are dragged through the mud for dating outside of race, please do not act like the reverse isn't also true. Black men "get it" from every side, and certainly from black women, when we date non-black. So that same dynamic of being labeled traitorous, self-hating, etc, goes for both sexes. There is no double standard...
What can't be overstated has barely been mentioned here, and that is that most blacks of the millennial generation and younger are EXTREMELY open to interracial dating. I get the sense that you're a lot older than me...I'm 26. So really, besides my comment above, I've found that these issues of dislike of interracial dating in the younger black community is minor. Oh, I've met people my age who fit the discussion we're having--what I'm saying is that isn't a normal occurrence. I think this was a bigger issue in past generations...
While I will agree that black men also view black women as the least desirable of women, I want to add that black men are physically attracted to and WILLING to be in a relationship with ALL women, no matter her race or ethnicity. In fact, I'd even venture to say that black American men or the most acceptable of interracial dating than our counterparts in any corner of the world, and certainly in America. No other race is as acceptable to dating black women, even admitting that our treatment of black women also shows we desire them least. White men may desire East Asian women more, but black men desire South Asians much more....
Everybody is attracted to white women, so that's a draw, in my estimation. White men have a facade of desiring Hispanic women, but only if they are white. Black men desire Hispanics regardless of racial makeup. Black men love Indian and Middle Eastern women, and are attracted to women of foreign nationality at least as much as any of our counterparts....my point is to kill this myth that black men desire white women as a symbol of status or achievement. That's baloney. Black men will date a woman of any background faster than any other man will, and, at least here in America, are physically desired (you can say listed) after by a more diverse palette of women than any other group of men...
Nothing I say should be read as if there are no individual exceptions, because there are more than enough of those if one chooses to find. I'm speaking as the general rule, majority in our culture...
As far as the stats on unwed black/mixed black children, I have no argument there. Facts are facts, although I'm a huge believer in that one can bend statistics and skew them however they want to emphasize their point. I digress...
The truth is that MANY black men who strictly prefer non-black women have self hatred issues. They prefer women with skin color, hair texture, eye color, nose shape, etc. that is vastly different from their own. They do not want to create children that have their same features so they prefer to procreate women who look nothing like them. Many are basically attempting to run away from their own blackness.
And it is also a given in the black community for black men to be allowed to do as they please while black women are supposed to remain loyal to the black community by rejecting any non-black man. The new thing is for black men (many of whom have a non-black spouse) to refer to any black woman who is even standing next to a white man as a "negro bed wench". So yes, there is a double standard.
The truth is that MANY black men who strictly prefer non-black women have self hatred issues. They prefer women with skin color, hair texture, eye color, nose shape, etc. that is vastly different from their own. They do not want to create children that have their same features so they prefer to procreate women who look nothing like them. Many are basically attempting to run away from their own blackness.
And it is also a given in the black community for black men to be allowed to do as they please while black women are supposed to remain loyal to the black community by rejecting any non-black man. The new thing is for black men (many of whom have a non-black spouse) to refer to any black woman who is even standing next to a white man as a "negro bed wench". So yes, there is a double standard.
What? This isn't true, but for a minority, and extreme minority at that, of black men. This is not true...
First of all, it is mostly black women, by FAR, who obsess over things like hair texture and skin tone. Black men do not have this degree of self-loathing at all. It is black women who moreso perpetuate this "light vs dark" complex; it is black women who desire their children to have non-black features. These things are relatively issueless in black male culture. It is an issue that exists, but DEFINITELY less so than it does with black women...
I have to ask, how old are you? Because we may be having a generational disconnect here. I've lived in seven states, and again, I am younger, and I have NEVER heard "negro bed wench". That isn't even something the "new" generation would say, and sounds like an older phrase. I have heard black men stereotype and put down black women in favor of non-black women, even in the presence of non-blacks, and will concede this is something that is far less common to hear black women do (put down black men in favor of non-black men in the presence of non-blacks)...
However, it's bs that black women allow brothers to "do as they please" in this context. Both sexes are known to bad mouth the other when we date non-black. But again, I want to stress this point, that in my generation, this is not the norm. We are far more open to free expressions of love or lust, without finger pointing and disdain for one another's preferences. This double standard you mention just simply doesn't exist. It is human culture in general for men to be viewed as being able to get away with actions that women can't; that double standard exists. But not this black men/women dating interracial thing...
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