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Springfieldva - how old are your kids now? How much did you pay for your house? How much did you pay for health insurance for your family when you were raising your kids?
Springfieldva - how old are your kids now? How much did you pay for your house? How much did you pay for health insurance for your family when you were raising your kids?
They are early 20s now. One is a college grad, one is in college. The youngest graduated from HS just a couple of years ago.
There are far younger people than us buying in the family friendly neighborhood that we currently live in so it's not like our lifestyle is that extravagant. There are stay at home moms with small children in the neighborhood and others with home based businesses and flexible hours. There are some retirees.
Our first home we bought in the late 90's right as the housing market was really starting to take off. Our rent had really gone up on our apartment and we had been saving for a down payment so we pulled the trigger and bought an older house. We also redid the siding, the roof, put in new windows, redid the bathrooms, the kitchen, put in new carpeting, upgraded the electrical, new HVAC, water heater, appliances...so I could give you the number we paid for the house but we put A LOT of money into that house. So it wasn't the steal of a deal that one might think. And the interest rate back then was 7 3/4 on the mortgage if I'm remembering correctly.
Health insurance wise, we're still paying for it just as we always have.
I tried that with neighbors who were SAHMs. It worked out with one for a year or so until she abruptly moved away. Another quit on me with no notice and told me my 6month old baby was spoiled. And yeah we had a problem where I wanted the tax credit for what I paid her but she would have to report the income and she didn't want to do that for fear it would disrupt her slew of government benefits.
Thankfully My DH and I were able to work opposite schedules after that so we didn't need babysitters. They are preteens now. I breathe a huge sigh of relief to be past that "finding childcare" stage
Yup, that's a big one. Even if there are some SAHMs who are looking to take in a daycare kid or two, it's not against the law to do so. The trouble is that parents looking for childcare cannot use their flexible spending account or dependent care tax credit to offset the cost, unless the care provider claims it as income and files a 1099. We can blame feminism and government regulations until the cows come home, but the fact of the matter is that the childcare system has been an unsustainable model for a long time. The US came close to addressing the problem back in 1971 when Congress passed Comprehensive Child Development Act; however, it was vetoed by Nixon, largely due to hysteria over welfare, feminism, and communism.
Health insurance is another stickler for alot of families. My DH job insured him but did not subsidize the kids or me. So while we could have lived on his income if he had to pay the health insurance for all of us it would have been over 1k a month. Not really doable after that. My employment had better insurance for myself and my kids. My kids are teens but it was about 3k after insurance for copays ect just to bring them home from the hospital. If your low(er) income you can get state health insurance - KidCare or Medicaid but we were over the limit on that - granted some states are more generous than others on who can qualify.
And we wonder (with the government getting concerned) why the birth rate is so low.
Health insurance is another stickler for alot of families. My DH job insured him but did not subsidize the kids or me. So while we could have lived on his income if he had to pay the health insurance for all of us it would have been over 1k a month. Not really doable after that. My employment had better insurance for myself and my kids. My kids are teens but it was about 3k after insurance for copays ect just to bring them home from the hospital. If your low(er) income you can get state health insurance - KidCare or Medicaid but we were over the limit on that - granted some states are more generous than others on who can qualify.
And we wonder (with the government getting concerned) why the birth rate is so low.
I had Kaiser through my job. We were young and healthy and rarely had reason to go to the doctor. When I became pregnant the prenatal appts had a minimal copay. Tests, ultrasounds, etc were all included. Even after I had a c-section and had to spend an extra day in the hospital, our hospital bill was next to nothing. I kept expecting to get a big old bill, but we never did. I still have the paperwork showing how everything was paid for. My husband switched to Kaiser at his job and we had a similar experience when our second was born.
We kept Kaiser when the kids were little and having all of the well baby/toddler exams and vaccinations. I do not remember how much we paid each month but it was a good deal.
I've known couples who have had babies with no health insurance - regular birth, released the same day - and their doctor appts and hospital bills were thousands upon thousands of dollars.
I know that no one wants to hear this but feminism basically did this. Women wanted out of the kitchen and into the work world. So here we are and we've put ourselves in a place where it's now very difficult to live on one one income in many places so two people NEED to work. Not everyone has the luxury of quitting and staying home with the kids now even if they want to. Childcare providers know this and can now charge exorbitant amounts since this is something people NEED.
women wanted to be in the working world but didn't think decades ahead to what families would do when they were forced to be in the working world with no one to watch their kids.
This is completely false. Women have always worked, particularly WOC and poor women. No, women were not all living like June Cleaver throughout history. Women would work fields too, the difference is they had their babies on their backs and their children with them.
It’s really amazing to me how many people(who I am guessing are older)are out of touch. Younger people who are getting situated in their adult lives, and just about to start families, are facing a major housing crisis with sky high rents and highly inflated mortgages, student loans with insane interest rates, grocery bills going up, healthcare bills which could potentially bankrupt them, all while wages are not going up anywhere near as fast as cost of living. It’s real easy for people the same age as my parents to bring up “keeping up with the Joneses” as a reason why families need two working parents when they got established in a time when cost of living was more proportional to wages.
Health insurance is another stickler for alot of families. My DH job insured him but did not subsidize the kids or me. So while we could have lived on his income if he had to pay the health insurance for all of us it would have been over 1k a month. Not really doable after that. My employment had better insurance for myself and my kids. My kids are teens but it was about 3k after insurance for copays ect just to bring them home from the hospital. If your low(er) income you can get state health insurance - KidCare or Medicaid but we were over the limit on that - granted some states are more generous than others on who can qualify.
And we wonder (with the government getting concerned) why the birth rate is so low.
I work for a Fortune 500 company. Our medical insurance premiums are tiered (lower for people with lower salaries, higher for people with higher salaries). Monthly premium at the lowest tier (salary < $60K) for the cheapest family plan is $270 per month, with an $8000 deductible (after which 80% coinsurance kicks in) and $14K annual OOP max. I just have an individual plan for myself (son is on husband's insurance), but for the plan I have it would be $800/month with $4000 deductible and $9K annual OOP max for the whole family. As is, I think as a combined family we pay around to $700/month for our medical insurance, all HDHP's.
ETA: Many employers will not cover a spouse if that spouse works and has decent medical insurance available at their job ("decent" is specifically defined, but includes most group medical insurance). I switched to my husband's insurance one year when we figured out it would be cheaper, and not even 6 months later I had to go back to my own employer's insurance when his employer implemented that policy (that was a pain, all the paperwork to show "loss of coverage" on my part).
Quote:
Originally Posted by NosyNita
It’s really amazing to me how many people(who I am guessing are older)are out of touch. Younger people who are getting situated in their adult lives, and just about to start families, are facing a major housing crisis with sky high rents and highly inflated mortgages, student loans with insane interest rates, grocery bills going up, healthcare bills which could potentially bankrupt them, all while wages are not going up anywhere near as fast as cost of living. It’s real easy for people the same age as my parents to bring up “keeping up with the Joneses” as a reason why families need two working parents when they got established in a time when cost of living was more proportional to wages.
This, 100%. I hear a lot of "I just don't understand this younger generation", and frankly it doesn't seem like the speakers are really interested in trying. It's much easier to just assume that they are somehow inferior, rather than admit that circumstances and society have drastically changed, and they would be doing the exact same things if they were 30/40/50 years younger.
There are a lot of articles about men getting discouraged and dropping out or not participating in the workforce. Perhaps they could get into the childcare business, seems like there's a lot of opportunity there.
This is completely false. Women have always worked, particularly WOC and poor women. No, women were not all living like June Cleaver throughout history. Women would work fields too, the difference is they had their babies on their backs and their children with them.
I grew up in the 50s and 60s in a college town.
Single parent kids were rare. I was actually the only one I knew. Through all 12 years of school, I was it.
Working mothers were rare. I knew one kid whose mother worked. She was a college professor.
It was a whole different world.
It’s really amazing to me how many people(who I am guessing are older)are out of touch. Younger people who are getting situated in their adult lives, and just about to start families, are facing a major housing crisis with sky high rents and highly inflated mortgages, student loans with insane interest rates, grocery bills going up, healthcare bills which could potentially bankrupt them, all while wages are not going up anywhere near as fast as cost of living. It’s real easy for people the same age as my parents to bring up “keeping up with the Joneses” as a reason why families need two working parents when they got established in a time when cost of living was more proportional to wages.
I share this so many times that I feel like a broken record, but I make more money (adjusted for inflation) than my parents ever did even at the top of my dad's corporate consulting career and yet the condo they bought as early 20-somethings in the mid-80s brand new is totally unaffordable to me as a 35 year old middle manager. Condos in that community that haven't been updated in 20+ years would cost $4000+ a month with current interest rates - and it's an hour and a half-2 hour commute each way from the nearest big job center (including my job) and schools have gotten much worse since the 80s when my parents lived there.
I make in the top 15% of household incomes in my state, but rent on my 2 bedroom/1 bath apartment in the suburbs plus daycare for one infant would be most of my take-home income unless I dramatically reduced retirement savings and ESPP contributions, the latter of which I'm relying on for a house downpayment and building up an more robust emergency fund.
If you bought more than 3 years ago, you're living in a different world. If you bought 10+ years ago? An entirely different galaxy. Family members have $1000 mortgages + homeowners insurance on 4 bedroom houses they bought as teachers and postal workers in the early 2000s but the going rate today would be closer to $5000-6000. Incomes certainly haven't increased that quickly!
Last edited by charolastra00; 10-31-2023 at 08:29 AM..
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