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I am hoping for some advice. My sister has just lost her second child, a lovely young man unexpectedly. He died in his sleep aged 22 and his sister died a few years back also in her sleep at the age of 21.
We live on different continents and there is no way to get to be there with her. Can you please give me any suggestions to help the family through this awful experience. I am so very sorry for them and especially my sister as we lost our brother the same way.
I have been in this situation with long distance family and close friends. I usually send a gift basket and then a personalized package with books on grieving or sometimes an album I've put together with photos of the person with family and friends. I usually make a point of calling the person at regular intervals to check on them and allowing them to talk, if desired. Of all the things, I've been told this is most appreciated because people tend to avoid bringing it up thinking it will be a hurtful reminder (That's not true. People don't forget that their loved one died.).
More than anything, I always ask the person what they would like me to do to help them at that moment or in the future. It may be difficult for her to tell you in the beginning, but this may change in the coming months/years if she knows you love her and want to help in any way you can. I think just being willing to help means a lot to people dealing with grief and they will let you know in their own time.
Oh my goodness, my heart goes out to you. I too have a sister and mom very far away, over 1200 miles, and I see them rarely. I wish I had some advice, but it is too close to home.
But I wanted to send you my support. I'm sorry for your loss.
A care package with some of her comforts would be nice, perhaps a blank journal. Also, arranging for a favorite restaurant/pizza shop to deliver them dinner a few nights would be very nice.
With modern technology one can reach and talk to the loved ones without expense to check up on them especially during hard times like these. A personalized note (send by the postal service) is also another option.
The suggestions others have given are so helpful . . . I can't add anything, but wanted to tell you that I am very sorry to hear of your nephew's death.
I also wanted to say that the advice about calling regularly (and listening to whatever your sister wants to talk about) would doubtless mean a lot to your sister and her family.
I am hoping for some advice. My sister has just lost her second child, a lovely young man unexpectedly. He died in his sleep aged 22 and his sister died a few years back also in her sleep at the age of 21.
We live on different continents and there is no way to get to be there with her. Can you please give me any suggestions to help the family through this awful experience. I am so very sorry for them and especially my sister as we lost our brother the same way.
I would appreciate any advice and guidance
Thanks
B
I would suggest looking at a website.... www.grieving.com that is meant for people suffering losses of all kinds. If they have a spiritual bent I can help them a lot more suggesting books. If not, the website can help to a certain extent. There's really not much you can do except listen. Most advice is well intentioned but it's best to wait until you are asked for advice, if ever, to give some.
Last edited by seethelight; 03-25-2014 at 02:22 PM..
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