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I'm so very sorry that you lost your son to suicide. He was a very handsome young man and looked so happy in the pic. I'm sure he's smiling down on you with that same beautiful smile during your camping trip. The only advice I can give to is to be kind to yourself and allow yourself to grieve. You'll never be the same person that you were before his death. You'll try to have to find your "new normal". You're still in the early stages of your grief journey and even if you do have a good day every now and then, you still hurt and it's going to take time to move through and try to continue with your life.
I totally agree with the posters on finding a suicide support group. They know every emotion you're going through and will be able to understand you.
There's so many caring and sympathetic people here and that has to be a little comfort for you coming from total strangers. My heart goes out to you.
My brother died of suicide at age 15 and I witnessed firsthand the path of destruction it leaves behind especially watching my parents suffer. I lost my 21 y/o son 5 years ago and I'm just now beginning to find my new normal.
I pray for strength for you and your family as the journey isn't an easy one. Allow yourself however long it takes to grieve Denver. The pain will always be there, but the intensity of it does lessen over time.
Sorry for your loss. I can relate to your son and understand the pain he went through because I've also suffered from depression all my life and think about suicide 50 times a day. Some days are better than others but most of time I have to keep reminding myself all the good things I would miss. It's literally a daily life and death battle which I know I will someday lose.
Sorry for your loss. I can relate to your son and understand the pain he went through because I've also suffered from depression all my life and think about suicide 50 times a day. Some days are better than others but most of time I have to keep reminding myself all the good things I would miss. It's literally a daily life and death battle which I know I will someday lose.
Just know it wasn't your fault.
Why? Why do you HAVE to lose the battle? Are you on any meds for your depression? Do you have friends or parents? I assume you are not destitute nor homeless. Life was never promised to be easy or fair. Keep reminding yourself of good things. Stop being selfish and think of how lucky you are to be alive! Think positive thoughts. Go get help. Think of the people you will hurt to their core. Go get help.
Why? Why do you HAVE to lose the battle? Are you on any meds for your depression? Do you have friends or parents? I assume you are not destitute nor homeless. Life was never promised to be easy or fair. Keep reminding yourself of good things. Stop being selfish and think of how lucky you are to be alive! Think positive thoughts. Go get help. Think of the people you will hurt to their core. Go get help.
Did all that, nothing helps. What does help is when I pick something in the future to look forward to. Since I am a sports fan, I am looking forward to June 25th when the NBA Draft is held. But I know ultimately it's a losing battle and it's a question of when not if.
You wouldn't understand unless you suffer from it.
Thank you all for your kindness. Today, 1st June 2015, would be Denver's 29th birthday. We celebrate the legacy he has left us and grieve his loss. He truly was a wonderful person. It is so sad he suffered so much pain.
Truly sorry for your loss and hope Denver is at peace.
Did all that, nothing helps. What does help is when I pick something in the future to look forward to. Since I am a sports fan, I am looking forward to June 25th when the NBA Draft is held. But I know ultimately it's a losing battle and it's a question of when not if.
You wouldn't understand unless you suffer from it.
I have suffered from depression since I was a teenager but I kept thinking about what would happen after I was no longer here and held out hope my life would get better. It did but cancer snatched him away. Once again I thought about it but when I found a jigsaw puzzle that hubby hid for me to find, I knew he would not want me to join him.
I like to have things to look forward to too but with no family, no friends to share with, no job anymore, I STILL refuse to give up and let that demon, depression, get the best of me.
I wish I could convey to you how utterly lonesome, sad and just "biding my time" my life is but I fake it until those feelings go away and I go on. I live for my cat and parrot now. Do you have pets or a pet? Pets are wonderful creatures. Unconditional love. They make you feel loved and happy. It feels good to love them back too.
Please try to stop these thoughts of suicide. You seem to be a lovely human being. Please try again with the help or meds. St. John's Wort is a good natural way of alleviating bad thoughts/feelings.
I am sorry, 303guy, I don't mean to hijack your thread about your precious boy, Denver.
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