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Am I the only one that remembers the movie Romeo Must Die? I believe the Asian guy in that movie was portrayed as both hot and badass. I've never thought of Asian men as less masculine. I've dated a few and that says a lot considering how few there are in the SE US. Maybe the stats say otherwise but the concept that a whole race of men is inferior to the others is an odd thought to me.
Id like to marry an Asian man. I am divorced with a child but living a celibate life style and I am hard working. I hope I find someone who will love and appreciate me. I am told I am very attractive. But of course looks fade and dumb is forever. Iv'e always thought Asian men were very attractive. ( in every way). I am thinking of going back to california or Hawaii to settle down and make my dreams come true.
Attractive.... LOL you can say anything about dating, but if you need a bone around your neck to get a date..... you can forget dating.
Not to mention unemployed.. no car.. no home.. list goes on.....
dating is kind of old school. people now, like to "hang out"
Am I the only one that remembers the movie Romeo Must Die? I believe the Asian guy in that movie was portrayed as both hot and badass. I've never thought of Asian men as less masculine. I've dated a few and that says a lot considering how few there are in the SE US. Maybe the stats say otherwise but the concept that a whole race of men is inferior to the others is an odd thought to me.
I remember a girl who liked Asian guys saying that it was actually good that general Americans saw Asian males as less masculine and wouldn't date them because that meant less competition for her.
Btw, a quote about the movie:
"
Ah, Shakespere's timeless love story Romeo and Juliet, updated for the hip-hop generation. With their two families feuding, a black girl (Aaliyah) and a Chinese man (Jet Li) find an unexpected bond—except for the fact that the couple didn't even share a kiss on screen, making the "love story" a bit of an anti-climactic joke. In fact, the movie originally ended with a kiss, but producers supposedly cut the scene at the last minute because it didn't "test well" with audiences. Damn. Can't the yellow man get some?
"
I remember a girl who liked Asian guys saying that it was actually good that general Americans saw Asian males as less masculine and wouldn't date them because that meant less competition for her.
Which brought me to another point.
Masculinity in America is strongly associated with aggressiveness, rebelliousness, independence, individualism.
Many of the "bad boy" characteristics coincide with what people are suggested, often subconsciously, that "real men" have.
Asians generally have values that teach them to be obedient and respectful [thus not rebellious] to parents and authorities and to be not individualistic in the sense that the family and/or community is just as important as self.
Asian males' respect towards females has often been viewed as weakness and simply unmasculine.
Also in the dating scene in the media:
Men who are naughty, who manage to get some in whatever way, who kiss a girl without caring if she wants it or not.
They have been portrayed as masculine and sexy. Those are the ones girls (and guys) are taught to desire, even though they eventually cause most misery.
Quote:
Originally Posted by chickenfriedbananas
I also agree with what you're saying particularly regarding Asian males. I think that a lot of Asian males grow up with a kind of conflict, with their families giving one model of 'maleness' and society around them offering another, entirely different model of what it means to be 'male'. In Asian households, being a man means doing well in school and taking steps to ensure that you get a great job after graduation. Being a hard worker. Being a team player first. Respecting authority. Understanding that the team and its goals are bigger than you. That kind of thing. It's what sets up Asian men to get a lot of good entry level jobs and become respected by employers in many instances.
However, in a lot of American society, this is not what is modeled as being male. Instead, much of American society seems to promote the idea of being macho, of being independent, of being rebellious and not taking orders. Being an independent, autonomous decision maker is valued. Being physically strong and having a bold and assertive personality is valued over being loyal and obedient to authority. That contrast makes it easy for others to perceive Asian men as weak.
[red colored by me]
I'm aware of the generalizations there. Yet a lot of the stereotypes, which themselves are not negative until one decides they are, are often subconscious and they affect the way we view and treat others.
We see it everywhere [except in Hawaii perhaps ] and the stats even show it.
" Gender patterns in intermarriage vary widely. About 24% of all black male newlyweds in 2010 married outside their race, compared with just 9% of black female newlyweds. Among Asians, the gender pattern runs the other way. About 36% of Asian female newlyweds married outside their race in 2010, compared with just 17% of Asian male newlyweds.
"
The gap between Asian females and Asian males outmarrying is probably narrower in Hawaii than in the rest of the States.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Neutre
That's generally true.
In the Anglo psyche,
Asian ~ feminine
whilst
Black ~ masculine
It's even reflected in some of the stereotypes, which I need not specify.
In Hawaii Asians are so "normal" that many of the sterotypes widespread in the Anglo world don't affect the general population's perceptions as much as in the rest of the States.
The Anglo media generally haven't allowed the portrayal of Asian men as main protagonist.
Even in the rare cases where an Asian man is a hero and even saved a protagonist girl's life, he does not get a kiss, whereas in similar scenarios with a White man the girl sometimes throws herself to him and let him "have her" to show her gratefulness.
In fact, it's very unusual when you don't note a certain sexual tension between the White man and the girl [not rarely Asian] before he gets to save her life.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Neutre
From a blog about Hawaii Five-0:
"
[Chin Ho Kelly and Kono Kalakaua] play second fiddle to the true heroes on the show. Kono does all the high-tech work to catch the criminal (another stereotype right there!) but Steve and Danno get to arrest the dude?! What’s up with that? Chin Ho is a local guy (although his Pidgin is atrocious) but he gets one-upped by some short Haole that just moved to Hawaii from New Jersey?! Come on Steve! If I was creating a police task force and needed to know where all the gangs congregate or where the criminal’s mom’s sister’s boyfriend’s friend lived, I wouldn’t call up the guy who lives in the Pagoda Hotel! I would call Chin Ho, the guy who actually grew up in Hawaii and probably went to school with the criminal’s mom’s sister’s boyfriend’s friend! Duh!
"
A positive attitude goes a long way. People can make their dreams come true if they reach for them. No one should tell ANYONE that they cant get the person they want to get.
You can marry or date anyone you want. Go for it.
On the mainland, Asian men are typically stereotyped as nerds, while Asian women are stereotyped as sexpots. Those stereotypes don't exist in Hawaii so you might do better. Get some tattoos too, that would help I'm sure.
Sorry, we have so many on hand already that most of the incoming are being diverted to San Diego.
But you know, I have a lot of compassion for your kind, and I try to help out whenever I can. So I run a little shelter program up here in the artists colony at Volcano, on the Big I... with intake sessions at the Lava Lounge over in the National Park, live music on weekends... let me know when you'd like me to meet you there to review your case.
I'd like to volunteer at this shelter for poor unwanted blondes.
On the mainland, Asian men are typically stereotyped as nerds, while Asian women are stereotyped as sexpots. Those stereotypes don't exist in Hawaii so you might do better. Get some tattoos too, that would help I'm sure.
I guess in Hawaii it's more difficult for the stereotypes to prevail because the population is exposed to so many Asians that, just as other Americans, have all sorts of different characteristics.
Quote:
Originally Posted by mercikaleb
A positive attitude goes a long way. People can make their dreams come true if they reach for them. No one should tell ANYONE that they cant get the person they want to get.
You can marry or date anyone you want. Go for it.
Unfortunately it is exactly what has been told to AsianAmerican guys for decades: That they can never be sexy and hot in a masculine way.
The rest of the general population also ended up finding it difficult to see Asian men in a manly sexual light.
I do agree though that attitude goes a long way. Confidence usually makes a man attractive. Although athletic White guys are easily considered sexy and hot regardless of whether they're confident or not.
The time I've spent in California/Nevada, I knew non-asian women who were especially interested in asian guys. It was their 'preferred' race of guys.
Maybe the California Asians don't at all typify the Asian immigrant image though, not sure.
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Romeo Must Die kiss scene
] and the stats even show it.
