"Moving to Hawaii requires acceptance and open-mindedness". What does this mean exactly? (Kihei: transplants, apartments)
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My question is in the title I keep reading comments along those lines on the internet. But I'm not sure what kind of 'attitude' is referred to when talking about newcomers from the mainland, and is to be avoided, and what exactly are newcomers supposed to make an effort and be open-minded about? What is it on the islands that's so hard to accept for (apparently) a number of mainlanders?
Any real-life concrete examples would be greatly appreciated.
Thanks in advance!
My question is in the title I keep reading comments along those lines on the internet. But I'm not sure what kind of 'attitude' is referred to when talking about newcomers from the mainland, and is to be avoided, and what exactly are newcomers supposed to make an effort and be open-minded about? What is it on the islands that's so hard to accept for (apparently) a number of mainlanders?
Any real-life concrete examples would be greatly appreciated.
Thanks in advance!
This is just the opinion of one mainland transplant... From my experience it basically means the same thing it means anywhere else... realize that there is a culture and way of doing things that you are not accustomed to and make it your first instinct to observe, ask, and try to understand rather than criticize.
But it also has some unique issues because it is Hawaii...
It means don't bring your "mainland attitude" with you which is stereotyped as loud, impatient, brash, materialistic, hurried, and generally less nice than the locals. Stereotypical "Type-A" characteristics are culturally frowned upon in a lot of ways.
It also means, in some ways, that you need to know your role as an outsider and your opinion will not always be welcome on certain matters particularly if it pertains to Native Hawaiian issues.
It also means that if you are a "mainland haole", which most transplants are, that you are now in the minority rather than the majority (except in Kailua or Kihei LOL) and will be subject to all of the things that come with being a minority. Some folks have a hard time dealing with that, and some locals like to push that fact in your face because they have a chip on their shoulder.
Imagine like you are a northeast transplant moving to Charleston SC, but magnify it times 100 because now you have an Asian majority on an isolated island with a unique language and culture where most folks struggle to get by due to a high cost of living, low paying jobs, and high demand to be there. Compound that with a history of colonialism and current issues of homelessness and poverty which disproportionately impacts native Hawaiians.
It is a nice place and the people are generally friendly, caring, and family oriented. But it has its issues just like any other place, you'll find out real quick that there are "local" and there are "mainland" ways of doing things... and "local" is typically viewed as better.
I don't know if this is a positive contribution or possibly "off-topic," but as someone who has lived in 3 states and sought to assimilate the knowledge and experiences of EVERYPLACE I've been to formulate what I think is right or wrong, I wanted to chip in.
To me, right is right, wrong is wrong PERIOD to an extent. Also, I don't think you should be dismissed as an "outsider" if you are a transplant. Everyone's opinion counts the same. We have the right to purchase land anywhere we please and advocate for the best life we can have there. I myself am not necessarily a respecter of culture and such, especially if it's used as an excuse for doing things in an inferior way, and I think it a bit close-minded if suggestions are scoffed off as "transplant ignorance" or "someone from the outside trying to tell us how to live." People should be open-minded to a better way of doing things irrespective of whether the thought originated from the locals or originated from someone not a life-long resident of the area.
For instance, in TX, I've heard of people disparage rap music as "filth," even when it's Christian-based rap music, and even when you have country songs with lyrics like "tequila makes her top come off." Yet the latter is example is dismissed with a shrug of "you're in TX, we're a country music state." I'm sorry, but that to me is an intellectual cop-out. If a rap song calling women b's and hoe's is dirty, so is a country song that says "tequila makes her top come off," and dismissing a Christian rap song because it's rap is just ignorant. (Now, if you are simply saying rap music isn't your TASTE, that's fine.)
In like manner, I think the custom of pulling over for a funeral procession is silly. I was raised in a state that did it, but as a life-long resident at the time, I thought it was silly. Residents in state #2 actually agreed with my opinion, and funeral processions were very rare (it would like, say, Austin only having a funeral procession if a former governor died or the like). Here in TX the response is "that's how we do things." I don't care, I still think it's ignorant. Why should I have to pull over and interrupt my life over the death of someone whom I don't know? "Because it's respectful." I think that's silly. "Respect" would be going to the funeral itself, stopping by the home of the surviving family members and comforting them in person, not pulling over to the side of the road. Therefore, no matter what people think, I drive on, even speeding up if I see a funeral procession approaching but I'm not yet tangled in the mess of it.
In Hawaii, I don't know how things are done, I can tell you I'd be very open minded about many things such as style of dress or different foods. However, I can also tell you that if, say, residents were prone to driving below the speed limit and clogging the freeways because they're "laid back," I'm going to want to get around that, I DON'T CARE if they're "laid back" and comfortable driving like old ladies in a Buick on Sunday. I think it's rude for people to do that, regardless of the custom. Understand--I'm totally guessing here, I have no idea if that's how people in Hawaii are, but if they are, it wouldn't stop me from saying I don't agree with it.
Now, I DO understand it in other ways. For instance, state #2 for me was southern AZ, a place which in fact had a lot of transplants. I was very accepting of the lack of greenery, trees, seldom rainfall, constant sunny days etc. I would chastize people griping about homes with no grass and how it seldom rained and how the scenery was cacti vs trees much of the time. I'd tell them "you're not in Illinois anymore." (For some reason, a HUGE amount of visitors were from Illinois, I'm not sure why that was the case.) By contrast, though, when a popular canyon was found to have non-native mountain lions tainting the experience for its visitors, I didn't hesitate to say "shoot the darn things then." I could have cared less that the area was populated with a lot of animal rights advocates who instead asserted that the animals should be left alone. I disagreed with them, and didn't much care that such misguided thinking was common for the area. In like manner, if I ever lived in FL, I wouldn't much care about how alligators are a part of the place--if I get 30 acres of land and alligators infest the lakes on it that I want to swim in, I'm doing the "shoot, shovel, shut up" thing and moving on with my life.
But I'm not sure what kind of 'attitude' is referred to when talking about newcomers from the mainland, and is to be avoided, and what exactly are newcomers supposed to make an effort and be open-minded about? What is it on the islands that's so hard to accept for (apparently) a number of mainlanders?
Some things to be open-minded about......
Low pay and high cost of living
Companies that don't call you back even though you want to do business with them
Rush hour is brutal on Oahu
Safety Checks for your car
GET taxes
$5 Footlong sandwiches (except Alaska and Hawaii)
500 sq ft apartments become your new normal
You may not afford AC - so prepare to sweat at night
Thank you all for your input. It's been quite instructive reading you, although I must say I'd really welcome any 'on-the-ground' experience of any cultural clash or attitude issue that you may have witnessed (or been a part of). Any real-life stories?
Quote:
It also means that if you are a "mainland haole", which most transplants are, that you are now in the minority rather than the majority (except in Kailua or Kihei LOL) and will be subject to all of the things that come with being a minority.
Would you mind elaborating on that? Because depending on each reader's background and experience, that sentence can sound VERY scary? As a former member of a Caucasian minority in the West Indies, I know how far that kind of mindset can go there and what it can lead to, and I hope it's not as bad in Hawaii...
Thank you all for your input. It's been quite instructive reading you, although I must say I'd really welcome any 'on-the-ground' experience of any cultural clash or attitude issue that you may have witnessed (or been a part of). Any real-life stories?
Just hang out on the Hawaii forum - that is where most of the "real life" culture clash and attitude is experienced rather than in day to day living in Hawaii.
Thank you all for your input. It's been quite instructive reading you, although I must say I'd really welcome any 'on-the-ground' experience of any cultural clash or attitude issue that you may have witnessed (or been a part of). Any real-life stories?
Would you mind elaborating on that? Because depending on each reader's background and experience, that sentence can sound VERY scary? As a former member of a Caucasian minority in the West Indies, I know how far that kind of mindset can go there and what it can lead to, and I hope it's not as bad in Hawaii...
Thanks again!
It is not scary and generally not an issue. There are some people who are resentful of white transplants just because they are white... but that is rare.
The big issue from my experience is if a confrontation occurs, that is when you find out what side you are on.
Specific examples:
As a security guard at a hotel in Waikiki I have heard my fair share of "F*cking haole piece of sh*t go back to the mainland where you came from"... rants from homeless that I asked to leave the property or locals getting into fights that I had to help break up.
I'd became very passive at unfamiliar surf breaks and stay out of peoples way because stuff that might not blow up between two locals would become an incident if I dropped in on someone. Some of it is just because surfers are territorial in general but some of it is racial as well.
I'd be in conversations with groups of locals. They would describe an incident where someone acted like a jackass, then someone would ask "what kind guy was it" and they'd say "one haole guy" and everyone kind of nodded as if to say "oh that makes sense then". If I give a WTF look they would say "oh, not like you... the odda kine haole". Kind of like the way you might here white folks talking about mexicans or some other minority group in places with a large white majority.
Other times it is just the way you are treated, talked to, helped, or prioritized by businesses and stuff. You don't know if it is personal, but if it happens enough you start to think it might be.
I didn't have many problems though overall I had a great experience there. I dated Hawaiian girls, I married a local girl. Her family is great to me and always has been. It is not a huge deal, it is just something you have to be aware of and know your surroundings. It is nothing that would keep me from living there.
Translatted to the simplest terms, its about your attitude and not your race. You have no mainland haole attitude so your accepted. Unfortantly its difficult to be a minority sometimes for some people because they are used to being the majority and are comfortable with the privileges that go with that.
Some are so comfortable with the privileges that they will twist something as simple as please watch your cultural attitudes to ask that is racism. Accept the culture and customs, be kind and humble and don't try to change your community to be like where you come from and you will be great.
@Op
To answer your question of a real life culture clashes. Redevelopment vs Conservation or keeping things local, small, slow and quiet. Best example.
Getting used to taking shoes off before entering someones house, letting others merge into traffic without using your horn. Living in small communities where people expect you to be involved and contribute. We attitudes before I attitudes. Simple examples
Last edited by hawaiian by heart; 12-03-2014 at 03:30 PM..
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I keep reading comments along those lines on the internet. But I'm not sure what kind of 'attitude' is referred to when talking about newcomers from the mainland, and is to be avoided, and what exactly are newcomers supposed to make an effort and be open-minded about? What is it on the islands that's so hard to accept for (apparently) a number of mainlanders?
And no sweeping generalizations!
