Isolated in Madison (Huntsville: pre-school, restaurants, store)

[shaken8]

Charles, that made my day.

As for the OP. From my experience, there are certain areas of town (in Huntsville and Madison) where if you don't fit into a certain little box of what "normal" or "upper middle class" (or whatever stereotype) is, you find yourself pretty lonely. I'm okay at faking it when I have to, but I'm a pretty odd personality that not everyone appreciates. I don't appreciate as much what everyone else seems to value (status, money, etc). I probably question things more than people think I should. I've found a niche where I live and have been much happier (NE Hsv, Five Points/Oak Park area). Anyway, I'm sure you can find a clump of people where you live that are more tolerant and open minded, but it might be tricky. And they may be hiding out, like you! "Tolerant" and "open-minded" are definitely not the first things that pop into my mind when I think of Madison, although I would have expected at least a little bit more surface politeness (not to dismiss any of the Madison people here on this board that happen to be genuinely caring people).

Like I said, I'm sure there are very interesting, open-minded people there, surely not everyone is going to be so puffed up about their status and "being seen" with the "right" people that you get totally ignored. So, good luck! And I second the advice of some of the other posters. If church is your thing, I definitely recommend a smaller church. From my experience, big churches seem to be magnets for the "being seen" attitude.

Good luck!

[jkratze1]

Whatever happened to southern hospitality.

[friday13]

Originally Posted by jkratze1

Whatever happened to southern hospitality.

there are 2 explanations here:

Being in the south doesn't equate southerner - especially in HSV/Madison

The Church of Every Day Snob teaching: "Ignore thy fellow parishioner" - something along those lines - I'm not a church person and my church vocabulary is limited-

[From Mars]

I did not think of this before, but I have not met many native Alabamians. The couple of native Alabamians that I have met are very nice. Mostly, I run into people from other southern states and midwesterners.(Please don't take this wrong. I am not saying people from other places aren't friendly, the ones that I met just aren't friendly towards me). Actually, when I met midwesterners in another state they were not very friendly towards me either. It didn't bother me at that time because they were in the minority.
What I think I need to do is find some disabled group. Certainly, they will not judge me. Honestly, I have not seen any disabled people in my vicinity. Wonder if there are just no physically flawed people in Madison or are they just hiding out?

Does any one know of any adult physically diabled groups that meet around here?

[Keeper]

You can also check out meetup.com for groups of ppl who are involved in something you like to do.

[caution]

Originally Posted by jkratze1

Whatever happened to southern hospitality.

It was always a myth, especially when you think about how warm and welcoming church congregations are to someone who is "different."

Southern hospitality is waving, friendly casual conversation with strangers, please, thank you and holding the door open. It's superficial.

Most congregations I've come in contact with in my years are only hospitable (real hospitality and open attitudes) to people just like them.

My $.02 is that the OP went to a conservative church and does not fit the mold so she had a hard time making buddies. This put her on the defensive and now everyone seems (to her) to be closing her off.

My family is mixed race as is my marriage, and honestly, folks here don't cause us one bit of trouble. Unless you count the mouth-breathing super heavy-weights (mostly women) who stare or "whisper" loud enough to hear from 50 meters. Of course, we laugh at them since they don't even have the mental capacity to stop eating when they're full.

[shaken8]

^ What caution said.

Southern hospitality can best be explained by the phrase "bless his heart". You know what that means. It's a nice way of saying they think you have a problem. ("That baby is ugly, bless his little heart." "Oh you don't go to church? Bless your heart." etc.) It's surface politeness, nothing more. Unless you're just like them, in which case, they welcome you right in.

Nothing against it, I've been in Huntsville my whole life and the attitude is still prevalent. Hey, it's better than getting the door slammed in your face!

[HB2HSV]

Originally Posted by shaken8

"Tolerant" and "open-minded" are definitely not the first things that pop into my mind when I think of Madison,

Well... bless your little heart !!

[33458]

My family is mixed race as is my marriage, and honestly, folks here don't cause us one bit of trouble. Unless you count the mouth-breathing super heavy-weights (mostly women) who stare or "whisper" loud enough to hear from 50 meters. Of course, we laugh at them since they don't even have the mental capacity to stop eating when they're full.

Now that was funny - two cookies for you!

[caution]

of course, even faked hospitality is better than none :-)