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Today I had my second interview in one month where I was asked point blank.
Are you married? Do you have children? How old are your children?
I want the jobs so I answer honestly. If you give that bull-crap statement of "that is an illegal question" or "I don't see how that would affect my job performance" as suggested - guess what, you aren't going to get the job.
I feel I need to start lying about it. I really feel that I missed out on today and the last job because I was honest about having children even though I assured them they were in school and had proper afterschool care.
This happening to anyone else? Should I start lying?
You should start suing is what you should do. If they ask you that question it's illegal but even "better" is that if you don't get the job you can always assume it's because you have kids and sue for more. Just my opinion but I say sue.
You should start suing is what you should do. If they ask you that question it's illegal but even "better" is that if you don't get the job you can always assume it's because you have kids and sue for more. Just my opinion but I say sue.
Suing will do you no good. You would have to prove that you didn't get the job because of your answer to that specific question. Next to impossible to prove.
I wouldn't lie. If you do there's no way that they won't find out eventually if you are hired, and then you will be branded as a liar--if you lied about that, what else did you lie about...
Instead if they ask if you have children, tell them that you have childcare arranged, including sick child care and school vacations.
If they ask if you are married, the best answer is a simple "Happily."
A lot of employers have gotten smart and now ask questions like "Do you have any obligations that would keep you from being able to travel or work overtime with little to no notice?"
Thank you for your responses. I really want the jobs so I do answer the question and try to ease concerns but, it is disheartening to know that I may not get the position because of these two wonderful little beings.
I think the company today must have had an issue with another person and their children in the past. The other company I think, worked a lot of overtime and thought that having children would make me not want to put in the hours.
I guess I should write it up as their loss as I know I could do the jobs and am one of the most punctual dedicated employees I know.
You're probably right. I think most of us have worked with someone who constantly had day care problems or often had to leave early or come in late due to school stuff/little legue/dance recitals/teacher conferences/etc.--and often expected coworkers to pick up the slack. It's unfortunate that they create a bad taste in many employers mouths for hiring anyone with kids.
Employers think moms are less desirable than 'singles' with no kids? I never left my job due to childcare issues. I wish they would not assume we don't have our schedules together. My husband is home all day so he can handle childcare issues if they arise.
Well you hang in there, 1984VT.
I can feel your pain.
I will probably be the last man (woman) standing here unemployed...
Until I get the **** out of Vermont.
I wouldn't lie. If you do there's no way that they won't find out eventually if you are hired, and then you will be branded as a liar--if you lied about that, what else did you lie about...
Instead if they ask if you have children, tell them that you have childcare arranged, including sick child care and school vacations.
If they ask if you are married, the best answer is a simple "Happily."
A lot of employers have gotten smart and now ask questions like "Do you have any obligations that would keep you from being able to travel or work overtime with little to no notice?"
Keep in mind that not every hiring manager or person conducting an interview is an expert in Equal Opportunity law (and may not have received any training). Sometimes those kinds of questions are asked innocently by those who don't know any better who just simply trying to get to know you as a person. They shouldn't, but they do.
If you're worried about it, the best way to respond might be to just give a little light-hearted laugh and say "oh I didn't think you were supposed to be able to ask those kinds of questions." That will come across much better than saying "That's illegal - you can't ask that." And if they persist (or as an alternative response) you can just say "I'd rather keep the interview focused on me."
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