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So my wife and I have been looking for a house. We narrowed down the neighborhoods we want to live in suffolk county. We chose these towns because the schools were good and they are western suffolk so our commutes are not too bad and the houses are much more affordable than Nassau.
We are planning on having children. We want our kids to grow up close with their cousins and our families. Our families live all in Nassau county mostly south shore. We’re worried we might be too far out and my wife is worrying the kids won’t see the families that much. For example Northport to merrick is about 40 minutes. Is my wife worrying over something trivial. I mean we aren’t looking out of state but she had me thinking also it would be nice to be close to family.
So my wife and I have been looking for a house. We narrowed down the neighborhoods we want to live in suffolk county. We chose these towns because the schools were good and they are western suffolk so our commutes are not too bad and the houses are much more affordable than Nassau.
We are planning on having children. We want our kids to grow up close with their cousins and our families. Our families live all in Nassau county mostly south shore. We’re worried we might be too far out and my wife is worrying the kids won’t see the families that much. For example Northport to merrick is about 40 minutes. Is my wife worrying over something trivial. I mean we aren’t looking out of state but she had me thinking also it would be nice to be close to family.
Thanks for advice
40 minutes isn't bad. Realistically how often are you going to see family. If it's everyday, yeah Northport might be too far but if it's like every weekend, every other weekend I don't think it is.
What would you do for childcare? If you are planning to have a family member care for your child, then yeah maybe Northport is too far. It really depends on your family dynamic.
I live in South Nassau. We have family out by Ronkonkoma. It's not a big deal to see them when we want to. At the same time, space is nice and not having family breathing down our necks all the time.
OP, it depends in part on what neighborhoods you are looking in and their proximity to parkways etc. You mentioned Northport, and so unless you are looking at an area very close to the Sunken Meadow Parkway, I can see where you are figuring 40 mins travel to Merrick. Northport isn't exactly convenient to any of the parkways. (Actually IMHO the northern parts of Northport are a PITA for commuting in general unless adjacent to the SM Parkway.) Certainly not as convenient as, for example, West Islip where you can easily access the Southern State in five minutes and then go from there; or parts of Commack and Smithtown where it's a hop skip and jump to get onto either the Sagtikos, the Northern State, or the LIE.
But as for family visiting, I will say this: No matter where you end up moving to, you will likely see family less often than you think (assuming that you are currently less than 10 miles from them now.) ESPECIALLY after you have kids! Trust me: Your daily life will change in ways that you think you can anticipate but you really cannot fathom. You (and family) will have the best intentions in the world about visiting often, but you will discover that there is not enough time in the week to do all the immediate necessary things around the house and with/for the kids (that's not even counting the times when they get sick and you have to cancel stuff, lol.) You'll end up prioritizing playdates with your kids' friends from school and from the neighborhood, partly because that's what your kids want to do but partly because it's going to be more convenient to schedule. Then your kids will get involved in sports or other activities that will take priority. No doubt there will be family birthdays and of course holidays when you and the kids will see the Nassau County relatives, but honestly: If you are thinking that you'll be taking the kids to visit their relatives twice a month, for example, the odds are that ain't gonna happen. Life as a parent will intervene.
So don't stress about 40 minutes, you will probably only be making that trip a half dozen times a year. Less, if the relatives come to your neck of the woods for your kids' birthday parties, LOL. If that is too much trouble for some, well, that's their problem, not yours.
For some reason my post wasn't submitted but BBCJunkie and Jdawg have captured my same thoughts. If you like Suffolk but 40 minutes is too much, look at West Islip or Bay Shore, as it cuts the drive in half. And yes, once you have kids your lives will revolve around them, meaning that when you get together with family it'll likely be 1-2 times a month max.
More important to pick a home and area that works for your immediate family than be closest to your extended family.
I think you only NEED to be close to family if someone will be watching your child. Otherwise live where you want and throw 'em in daycare.
A home is the single most important purchase you will ever make. Family will not be around forever and neither will you. Live where makes the most sense for you and your family at this point in time.
People will make it a point to come and see you no matter where you are. Maybe not as often, but moving Suffolk is not family ties suicide by any means.
If you like Suffolk but 40 minutes is too much, look at West Islip or Bay Shore, as it cuts the drive in half.
Two other advantages to WI and BS: If you ever end up working in the NYC and need to commute by train, they are both easy access to the LIRR. Many trains start/end at the Babylon station which is right next to WI.
Also, if you need to get to Nassau by car and there's an unmitigated disaster on the Southern State, you have the alternative (from WI or BS) to easily hop onto the Robert Moses Parkway, over the bridge, and head west on Ocean Parkway to either the Wantagh or the Meadowbrook. When we lived in West Islip I worked in Manhasset for about 8 years and would often take the Ocean Parkway alternative. It was longer milewise but timewise often better (and even when it wasn't, it was a much nicer/prettier drive, the only thing you need to worry about are the radar traps because it's waaay too easy to clip along at 75 or more on Ocean Parkway during commuter hours, LOL.)
Going to Merrick from WI/BS via Ocean Parkway to Meadowbrook Parkway would be a piece of cake (well, not on summer weekends but still...)
great advice thanks everyone. We don't really NEED to be close to family, but it would definitely help when we have kids.
We did look in West Islip starting out and the taxes are a little on the high side for what we saw. Bay Shore I really don't know much about.
We like Northport/E. Northport because the schools are rated high and taxes are very reasonable. I know of the rumors about LIPA I guess that is a risk we would have to take. A few houses in East Northport we actually found houses with taxes under 9k. So even if the taxes went up 50% which is an insane amount, they still would be under 14k, and 14k is about the average what we were seeing on nassau.
We also like Melville, I talked to a very knowledgeable member on here about the area and there is a few sections where the taxes are relatively low on smaller properties. Also this would be MUCH closer to family but it is also harder to get a home here as more competition naturally with HHH schools and distance to city being much closer.
Last edited by LIGUY2000; 01-23-2020 at 03:11 PM..
The Islips are probably best bet.
Easy to get to all major roads and you've also got convenient train access if need be.
Taxes are hit or miss but generally more affordable than Nassau.
Don't know if you watch the news but evidently your kids will glow in the dark in NP.
Melville is flyover and traffic territory. I don't find the appeal to Melville or Dix Hills, etc at all.
A 35 or 45 minute drive is a joke on LI. It's nothing really. Especially if it's for "pleasure" and not a daily grind.
Two other advantages to WI and BS: If you ever end up working in the NYC and need to commute by train, they are both easy access to the LIRR. Many trains start/end at the Babylon station which is right next to WI.
Good point. You want to avoid the Port Jeff line if possible. Change at Jamaica, Hicksville or Huntington, or take the unreliable dual mode diesel to Penn.
great advice thanks everyone. We don't really NEED to be close to family, but it would definitely help when we have kids.
We did look in West Islip starting out and the taxes are a little on the high side for what we saw. Bay Shore I really don't know much about.
We like Northport/E. Northport because the schools are rated high and taxes are very reasonable. I know of the rumors about LIPA I guess that is a risk we would have to take. A few houses in East Northport we actually found houses with taxes under 9k. So even if the taxes went up 50% which is an insane amount, they still would be under 14k, and 14k is about the average what we were seeing on nassau.
We also like Melville, I talked to a very knowledgeable member on here about the area and there is a few sections where the taxes are relatively low on smaller properties. Also this would be MUCH closer to family but it is also harder to get a home here as more competition naturally with HHH schools and distance to city being much closer.
-Northport: Absolutely love. However, there is no easy way to get up there. Only the major parkways.
-Melville: Very nice too. However, hate to deal with Rt110 everyday
-West Islip: Very nice. Close to all major highways/parkways
-Bayshore: Forget it
I guess it would come down to price, house condition & taxes.
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