LA dating & culture differences there vs everywhere else

[BarcelonaFan]

My ex says that I have always projected a very stable and sober vibe, and that they can sense that

Yes, I've also won a few casual conversations with random women because I look stable and nice. It always struck me as wild that they just liked this "alpha male" look which essentially meant that I just looked like a "regular" guy, i.e. sweatpants, t-shirt, stable look like I am going to go fix my car or something. I thought that just being a regular joe that I was not going to get jack squat in LA considering a lot of the guys are hipster, pretty boys, nerd, metros, gay or yuppie/yipster. Some of the women I meet are actually surprised I open a door for them or look attentive and excited to hear about what they have to say.

This is all common sense stuff to me though. It makes me wonder just how these guys in LA act with their gfs or on a date?

[California-Dreaming]

Originally Posted by trancedout

So there's a "Salt Lake Shore" in Utah?? Doesn't seem very well known.

You'd be surprised. It's just not a huge population because drinking is not a "normal" thing for most people here. Although it has gotten a lot better since I was a kid, we are starting to see a change as more people do the California cash out and come over here. The city has it's own great things to offer, but dating world sucks!

[bmwguydc]

Originally Posted by BarcelonaFan

Yes, I've also won a few casual conversations with random women because I look stable and nice. It always struck me as wild that they just liked this "alpha male" look which essentially meant that I just looked like a "regular" guy, i.e. sweatpants, t-shirt, stable look like I am going to go fix my car or something. I thought that just being a regular joe that I was not going to get jack squat in LA considering a lot of the guys are hipster, pretty boys, nerd, metros, gay or yuppie/yipster. Some of the women I meet are actually surprised I open a door for them or look attentive and excited to hear about what they have to say.

This is all common sense stuff to me though. It makes me wonder just how these guys in LA act with their gfs or on a date?

So true. I have often wondered that myself, but then again I'm the guy who told a fantastic lady that I was dating to give her ex-husband another shot when he came back into the picture. I knew I should have bought out his half of the house, as they were co-owners after the divorce was finalized, and when they had a buyer, she called him to come over and sort through what he wanted from the house that she was not going to take. But, since they had two children together, it was the right thing to do, though I lost out, as did the people who wanted to buy the house.

Perhaps I am of a different mindset, but I agree that opening doors, car doors, driving them at night if they do not wish to drive, or if safety could be a potential issue, etc. are things that are just normal to me. It really does make me wonder how people I know who seem to have new girlfriends all the time actually act, though one guy I know runs from any sort of commitment.

Confidence and consideration go a long way in LA, I have found. And, if someone takes the time to give me a compliment on my tie or needs help getting something from the top shelf in the grocery store, I am not so self-involved to ignore that situation. I am also not a game player, so I think that also comes across in my interactions, weeding out the superficial interactions and also giving insight into my motives when meeting someone for the first time. Corny lines, situations, and exacting plot lines that are worthy of a sitcom may play well for entertainment, but don't do well for long-term relationship success.

[BarcelonaFan]

Corny lines, situations, and exacting plot lines that are worthy of a sitcom may play well for entertainment, but don't do well for long-term relationship success.

Well in LA, especially West LA, life has a habit of imitating art and nearly everyone I've met there acts like they're being filmed for a TV sitcom. I always used to wonder living in TX just who the people were in these shows like The New Girl or anything on prime time TV. I had never met anyone that vapid, or insulated, or just plain obnoxious like they were a character out of a Diablo Cody movie. I finally met them in West LA.

[EclecticEars]

Originally Posted by BarcelonaFan

Well in LA, especially West LA, life has a habit of imitating art and nearly everyone I've met there acts like they're being filmed for a TV sitcom. I always used to wonder living in TX just who the people were in these shows like The New Girl or anything on prime time TV. I had never met anyone that vapid, or insulated, or just plain obnoxious like they were a character out of a Diablo Cody movie. I finally met them in West LA.

I'd never met the smug, sanctimonious, love-my-own-farts personalities that South Park depicts San Francisco to have.

...that is, until I started going to San Francisco frequently. Sadly, they tend to permeate much of Marin, the Peninsula and Berkeley, too.

So, just hope that your vapid/insulated/obnoxious west side chicks don't have a desire to go to Alhambra, Buena Park, Riverside, etc. and ruin Greater L.A.

[moonsparkle]

Originally Posted by BarcelonaFan

Well in LA, especially West LA, life has a habit of imitating art and nearly everyone I've met there acts like they're being filmed for a TV sitcom. I always used to wonder living in TX just who the people were in these shows like The New Girl or anything on prime time TV. I had never met anyone that vapid, or insulated, or just plain obnoxious like they were a character out of a Diablo Cody movie. I finally met them in West LA.

Taking a wild guess...

typically white 22-34, moved from elsewhere in the US?

I was watching one of those bravo reality shows and there's a girl on there who is from LA originally and she pointed out how people who "act LA" can be very annoying, her being from there, it's not this amazing thing to be in LA the way it is for the others. Well, the rest of the cast is originally from the midwest or east coast and they do act a certain way.

Of course, a lot of people who move to LA don't act this way, but it seems like the majority with this mindset aren't from LA or Southern California generally.

[Tlaneloli]

Originally Posted by bmwguydc

So true. I have often wondered that myself, but then again I'm the guy who told a fantastic lady that I was dating to give her ex-husband another shot when he came back into the picture. I knew I should have bought out his half of the house, as they were co-owners after the divorce was finalized, and when they had a buyer, she called him to come over and sort through what he wanted from the house that she was not going to take. But, since they had two children together, it was the right thing to do, though I lost out, as did the people who wanted to buy the house.

Perhaps I am of a different mindset, but I agree that opening doors, car doors, driving them at night if they do not wish to drive, or if safety could be a potential issue, etc. are things that are just normal to me. It really does make me wonder how people I know who seem to have new girlfriends all the time actually act, though one guy I know runs from any sort of commitment.

Confidence and consideration go a long way in LA, I have found. And, if someone takes the time to give me a compliment on my tie or needs help getting something from the top shelf in the grocery store, I am not so self-involved to ignore that situation. I am also not a game player, so I think that also comes across in my interactions, weeding out the superficial interactions and also giving insight into my motives when meeting someone for the first time. Corny lines, situations, and exacting plot lines that are worthy of a sitcom may play well for entertainment, but don't do well for long-term relationship success.

I'm of the opinion that confidence and consideration can go a long way anywhere

I don't play games either, I mean I can be quite the flirt sometimes but I almost always am just doing that for fun, not to get in anyone's pants I just have fun doing it, I've pulled off some terrible lines but I was doing it jokingly, it's all in good fun