MA Commuter Question (Boston: rent, hotel, home) - Massachusetts - City-Data Forum

Remy11 · 03-25-2022, 04:14 AM

Hi Mass friends,

You guys were all a huge help when I posted before about commuting to Boston from the north shore, so I wanted to use your resources again.

So, as many of you know, the job market is on fire for us workers. As someone who can honestly say they never had much activity on Linked In before, I'm getting recruiters chasing me down practically daily. It's great, right?! Well, it should be, anyways.

So, here's my conundrum. I was recently promoted to a non-managerial senior position making 20% more. I've never managed people (just projects) and initially didn't think I wanted to be a manager, but am starting to realize it's costing me some job opportunities as I reach the mid-point of my career. (Full disclosure: I'm close to mid-forties). Like anyone else, I'm happy at my job for some reasons but also find there are negatives too. The pros are that I know I have job security and I've been at the company for a while, so I have plenty of institutional knowledge. The big con is that my little team doesn't have a director right now and I'm not sure if and when we will, so we don't have a mentor going to bat for us and we're kind of getting walked all over in the form of lots of added work that a director would be able to keep at bay. It's long hours and lots of work.

So, this is where it gets tricky. I had a recruiter calling me non-stop about a job on the south shore (I'm on the north shore). I ended up getting the job. This job is another 20% more, has a higher title, and has two direct reports, so it's definitely a step up that I won't be able to get in my present job. I have basically capped out position-wise and salary-wise at my current job. However, my job is fully remote and if I do have to go into the office, it's close and I hit zero traffic. The new job is about 2 hours each way during rush hour. They are saying I only have to go in one day a week but I have yet to see that in writing. And even if it's in writing, companies can still make you go in. We're just employees at will at the end of the day. Plus, I have two friends who were initially told they could work remotely and now their companies are forcing them to go back. So, even though the new job is better in title and pay, it's very far and I'm not convinced it can be the 4-day remote job I want for the long haul.

So, do I stay put where I have security, institutional knowledge, and a great commute? Or do I take the bump up but potentially get big time screwed with a nasty, 4-hour round trip commute?

If I do pass this job up, this will be the second higher-paying job I have passed up. The first one was just not a fit and even tho it was more money, it was going backwards in the type of work I do big time. So, even tho I'm glad I passed up the first offer, is it bad to now pass up a second job that pays more?!

Oh, and the other thing that concerns me about the new job is where I will have two direct reports, does it look kind of bad for a new manager who is new to the company only in one day a week for them? I did hear the director at the new company lives close and will be coming in full-time soon and so will my counterpart. So, yes, there is a chance I'd be that MIA manager.

Please, help a fellow Massh**e out! I honestly have no clue what to do! GeoffD, timberline, invisimmun321, msRB311, johngolf, outdoorlover, Massnative71, MikePRU, BostonGymJunkie, wittydata, cb2008, BostonShudra, Bosyuppie, and all my other friends on here. HELP!

timberline742 · 03-25-2022, 04:21 AM

You could, you know, move if you have to go in more often.

Remy11 · 03-25-2022, 04:29 AM

Oh, thank you for mentioning that! I love where I live and don't want to move. I found my forever home in a forever town and love it here. Thankfully we bought 5 years ago and where we are is what we can comfortably afford, otherwise I would maybe consider. Plus, I'm a north-shore-for-life type lol!

htfdcolt · 03-25-2022, 04:49 AM

My view--partly because this is what happened to me in my 30s--if someone higher up thinks you're managerial material, you ought to at least go for it. 2 direct reports is very modest, and the stature & salary bump are not be taken lightly.

If you do, I would "front end load" the onsite presence--spend 2, 3, 4 days / week during the first 6 months to build solid relationships with your direct reports and what is certain to be a new set of stakeholders and "internal customers." Without that firm footing, where they know you, how you think, and vice versa, a purely remote managerial stint is likely to fail. After that, you can easily drop back to your desired 1 day/week...but don't assume you can start off that way, and expect to be successful.

simplexsimon · 03-25-2022, 04:50 AM

I don't know what 20% equates to for you but calculate what that comes out to in terms of $ per hour with the added commute (4 hours, 8 hours, etc). See what your breakeven number of hours commuting is and don't forget to discount for the soul crush factor of sitting in the car in traffic.

Any chance you can get promoted with your current employer? It would be the experience you need to boost your resume for the role after that.

Remy11 · 03-25-2022, 04:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by htfdcolt

My view--partly because this is what happened to me in my 30s--if someone higher up thinks you're managerial material, you ought to at least go for it. 2 direct reports is very modest, and the stature & salary bump are not be taken lightly.

If you do, I would "front end load" the onsite presence--spend 2, 3, 4 days / week during the first 6 months to build solid relationships with your direct reports and what is certain to be a new set of stakeholders and "internal customers." Without that firm footing, where they know you, how you think, and vice versa, a purely remote managerial stint is likely to fail. After that, you can easily drop back to your desired 1 day/week...but don't assume you can start off that way, and expect to be successful.

htfdcolt,
Exactly. That's my concern. How can you be successful if you're a newbie and simply not around enough to form these important relationships? I totally agree with you about the going in part for the first 6 months, but I'm not kidding when I say this commute is 2 hours each way. That's honestly not an exaggeration or me being dramatic. This job is south of Boston and I am one town away from NH!

And you make a great point about jumping at the chance if someone is willing to hire a new manager. I applied at the Wayfair corporate offices and didn't get it because I was told I didn't have the MGMT experience, so I know for a fact it has cost me at least one job.

Remy11 · 03-25-2022, 05:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by simplexsimon

I don't know what 20% equates to for you but calculate what that comes out to in terms of $ per hour with the added commute (4 hours, 8 hours, etc). See what your breakeven number of hours commuting is and don't forget to discount for the soul crush factor of sitting in the car in traffic.

Any chance you can get promoted with your current employer? It would be the experience you need to boost your resume for the role after that.

simplexsimon,
Unfortunately I don't see myself getting promoted at my current job again any time soon. The Dept is very small and the next step would be director and for various reasons I'm pretty sure I would not be a candidate for that. But, you do make a good point about the salary increase vs the soul-crushing commute. Plus, with the price of gas right now, it might not even be that much more money in the end.

thinkingotherthings · 03-25-2022, 05:08 AM

2 hrs each way is more than I could handle, especially if you think it will be more than 1x/wk. I would consider passing and applying to companies closer to you, since you said moving is out of the question. OTOH if it really is just onsite 1x/wk maybe you coud do it and if they do end up increasing the frequency then you look for a new job at that time, now with a bit of management experience under your belt. But man, even for 1x/wk, 2 hrs each way is a lot, especially if you're driving..

simplexsimon · 03-25-2022, 05:16 AM

Being close to the NH border obviously restricts your in-person opportunities and that is tough as a new manager as the poster said above.

When you say "losing out on job opportunities" do you mean for manager roles? Or just more pay? Do you just want to get out of your current situation? Many people are content working their whole lives as individual contributors.

If you haven't already, take a look at tech companies in your industry. Not Google or Amazon but something like a smaller software firm whose product you use daily. At least in my industry, remote work kicked the location barrier down to work for a tech company. Pre-pandemic I would've had to move to SF or NYC. Some companies I looked at do say they want you to attend team meetings in person a couple times a month but they are willing to pay for all travel costs. Hopefully similar companies and positions exist for your industry and skillset.

Boston Shudra · 03-25-2022, 05:16 AM

I wonder if you could take public transit through the city and then rent a car on the South Shore? Kind of convoluted and made far worse by the lack of a north-south rail link, but you’d avoid having to sit in the tunnels for hours each way.

Or if you really only need to go once a week, maybe you stay overnight at a cheap hotel on the days you have to go in so that you only do one leg at a time and can avoid rush hour going home?