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Hi Folks,
I already posted this in Education under colleges/universities but also wanted to cross post here since we have quite a few prestigious private schools here in Mass. If the admin feels it doesn’t belong here, I can delete. No problem.
I certainly hope this question doesn’t come across as arrogant or rude but it’s something that’s been on my mind for some time. Let’s say you send your child to a prestigious and expensive private school and then for whatever reason (finances, grades, etc) they end up going to your state’s flagship university or a not-so-super-fancy top college. Is this something that disappoints parents? For instance, let’s say you send your child to Phillips Andover and then they end up going to UMASS Amherst. Or you send your child to Avon Old Farms in Avon, CT and they end up going to UCONN. I guess what I’m asking is this: does it bum parents out who spend big money on a private school education to see their students then go to a college they could have just as easily gotten into with a public school education?
Also, I know sports recruiting may factor into some of these decisions, so for argument’s sake, let’s take sports out of the equation here entirely. Let’s also assume we’re talking about full-pay students and scholarships aren’t a factor here either.
And for the record, I graduated from a state uni and had a fantastic college experience there, so I am in no way knocking state schools at all.
It totally depends on the parents. Of course it will disappoint some parents. And other parents will be fine with it. Maybe even the same parents with different kids. At the end of the day, some kids are lucky to get into UMass and some kids are unlucky to only get into UMass.
Yes, for full pay students it would be a let down for the parents unless I guess they were so rich they didn't take much of a hit shelling out over $250,000 for high school.
But what you probably see a lot is parents full paying those elite prep schools, not getting into Ivy's/NESCAC schools, then full paying BC, BU, or NYU because their kid got in because the school knew they could pay.
Yes, for full pay students it would be a let down for the parents unless I guess they were so rich they didn't take much of a hit shelling out over $250,000 for high school.
But what you probably see a lot is parents full paying those elite prep schools, not getting into Ivy's/NESCAC schools, then full paying BC, BU, or NYU because their kid got in because the school knew they could pay.
Yes, but BU and BC are still generally better than UMass.
And NYU is far better than Hunter.
It totally depends on the parents. Of course it will disappoint some parents. And other parents will be fine with it. Maybe even the same parents with different kids. At the end of the day, some kids are lucky to get into UMass and some kids are unlucky to only get into UMass.
Plenty of kids going to UMass and even some to UMass Lowell.
And about 10 or so that didn't even go to college.
I agree, it's up to the parents. Some have high expectations especially if there were alums of the private schools and others may simply understand that their child simply isn't going to follow in their footsteps.
As an aside, I know someone who went to Phillips Andover as a local on scholarship. He did well, got into a well regarded school, and failed miserably his freshman year. He followed his Dad into a blue collar job at then NE Telephone. He put in his 30+ years in a union job earning well over 6 figures in his last years, retired at 55, and receives a pension/health care and a discounted Verizon cable package.
It also depends on the major.
If you study engineering, for example, UMass Amherst is as good as BU and alike. In fact its computer science program is very good too.
Arts, social sciences or business may be different. These majors also rely on connections more.
MA parents put a lot of emphasis on education/schooling. This is evident in the number of folks you see out on the highway with brand, spanking new cars who feel the need to put a decal promoting their children's HS or college, or their Alma Mater on the back window. I swear they show up at the dealership and apply the decals right there.
Part of my peer group has kids just old enough to start the college search and it seems like it's such a competition to get into a "great" school even if the desired major is something akin to underwater basketweaving. Unfortunately there's a bit of "keeping up with the jonses" playing out there.
Of course, I do realize though that a degree from Harvard does stand out a lot more than one from a state school but the lengths that people are willing to go to to put their kid in one of those schools can put folks into a lot of debt.
Quote:
Originally Posted by MtPleasantDream
If you study engineering, for example, UMass Amherst is as good as BU and alike. In fact its computer science program is very good too..
We get a lot of engineering co-op applicants from Ulowell. They are just as competitive as any of the bigger local engineering schools. Every single one that has come through me with a couple co-ops under their belt went on to easily land a job in the field.
Again, this isn't saying that a degree from MIT won't get you placed, but my point is you don't need a top school to be successful. Does it help? Yes, but no need to go $200K+ in debt over it when there are other options. Unfortunately some parents will not be as eager to boast to their friends about their kid getting into Ulowell, which is unfortunate.
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My point is yes, i can see parents (especially in MA) being disappointed in their children not succeeding after attending some of these fancier schools, but it all depends on the parents.
Last edited by BostonMike7; 05-09-2022 at 11:09 AM..
Hi Folks,
I already posted this in Education under colleges/universities but also wanted to cross post here since we have quite a few prestigious private schools here in Mass. If the admin feels it doesn’t belong here, I can delete. No problem.
I certainly hope this question doesn’t come across as arrogant or rude but it’s something that’s been on my mind for some time. Let’s say you send your child to a prestigious and expensive private school and then for whatever reason (finances, grades, etc) they end up going to your state’s flagship university or a not-so-super-fancy top college. Is this something that disappoints parents? For instance, let’s say you send your child to Phillips Andover and then they end up going to UMASS Amherst. Or you send your child to Avon Old Farms in Avon, CT and they end up going to UCONN. I guess what I’m asking is this: does it bum parents out who spend big money on a private school education to see their students then go to a college they could have just as easily gotten into with a public school education?
Also, I know sports recruiting may factor into some of these decisions, so for argument’s sake, let’s take sports out of the equation here entirely. Let’s also assume we’re talking about full-pay students and scholarships aren’t a factor here either.
And for the record, I graduated from a state uni and had a fantastic college experience there, so I am in no way knocking state schools at all.
For the parents with the financial means and for whom a particular college matters that much, they have options to make it happen regardless of the child's performance. For every 'option' like the one Lori Laughlin got caught in, there's another 5 that remain available.
For the parents with the financial means and for whom a particular college matters that much, they have options to make it happen regardless of the child's performance. For every 'option' like the one Lori Laughlin got caught in, there's another 5 that remain available.
that’s becoming harder to do these days. Sure someone will always have connections but most don’t. Legacy is pretty much done as well. Plenty of schools dont care if someone’s parent or sibling went there.
And yes I know plenty of parents who are all about the name. Right down to what the club sport name is for a 6 year old.
Although it does depend on the parents, my guess is that for the most part, the answer to the question is yes. I do think most parents would be dissapointed. Why else would they be sending and paying for their kid to attend an expensive private school? I mean, they aren't doing it because they expect their kid to be a mechanic or plumber, which are both perfectly fine careers just not why kids are sent to prep schools like that.
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