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She has had problems with a strange neighbor in the past. She has tried the security cameras and moved out due to fear for herself and her pets. So her being there again really isn't possible.
Since you know the history of the situation..What happened with the security camera, how long did she have it there?
I have come to believe that sometimes, we are simply destined to go through really difficult periods in our lives, when nothing seems to go right and the most unexpected and debilitating things happen, in succession.
I think at those times, it is like a trial . . . and we prove to the Universe that we are either a victim or a survivor. That may sound overly simplistic, but it is actually a very complicated process. We have to draw into our deepest reserves and rely on faith, trust that we are strong enough to weather anything that happens to us . . .
By thinking of one's self as a survivor, this gives us back our power.
If you believe in God or a High Power, these are the times to consider that God sometimes tears us down in order to re-build our lives in a new way.
We can't always control what occurs in our lives. We surely can't control what others choose to say to us . . . but we can control our reactions and how we process all those things.
Maybe the universe put you in the position to have that conversation, and to hear those insensitive, mean-spirited remarks so you could process that this person could NEVER have been someone you would want to see in your future.
Sometimes, the most hurtful things are blessings, b/c they give us new insight and a chance to re-think that other person's importance in our lives.
Such a great post Ani. Sometimes, all you can do is say, "What lessons am I supposed to take away from this?!" Yes, it's hard, going through those times, but saying, "This will NOT destroy me. I will not let it! I AM going to come through this. The sun will come out again, eventually and I'm going to have my shorts and flip flops ready for when that day comes!" It WILL come....you just have to be patient and do the best you can with what you've got and FIGHT damn it! I'm not talking about physical fights or doing anything negative....but fight until you get your head up out of the clouds. Is it hard...hell yeah it is. Sometimes you can feel like you're drowning in a sea of despair, but you have to tell youself, I'm NOT going down without a fight!
If I might ask Misty, when you say 'help', what is it you're requesting of the police?
I would request they have a conversation with someone, not to accuse him, rather to plant a seed in his brain that perhaps they are questioning who is doing the damage to my house. For once, I would like them to think things through. Hmm, who really hates her or would have motive and easy access? But I'd be expecting too much to expect them to think this.
Instead? I got told this a.m. that the vandalism was done by a bird or animal. Wow. This is just like before when someone smashed my pool part and put it back under the chaise lounge. I was told then a bird or animal did that too. A very talented bird or animal to both retrieve it from under and put it back I might add.
I am absolutely with Virgode on this! If you can not stay there yourself, is there ANYone, you can get to stay in the house and watch it? Can you find a way of securing the funds to install a couple of security cameras on the place, so that you can see who's doing the vandalizing. Think proactive Misty...... What about Crimestoppers or some other organization? There HAS to be someone out there who is willing to help you. Busy yourself with finding those resources. There IS someone who will help you. You just haven't found them yet.
I hate that this is happening to you, but there is help out there. I know there is. You just haven't turned over the right stone yet. Okay...you know the law isn't going to plant someone on the property to help you. Clearly, that door closed. Open some other doors. There are more there you just haven't opened yet.
Thanks to you and thanks Virgode I liked your ritual tip.
I am working on precisely what you say, but don't want to go into details. I have something set up soon. It may help, it may not, but it's worth a try. And I cannot stay there.
Oh, and I thought about the media but no, not a good idea even though it would be a great story.
And I just have to say this, as it's making me sad, but I am losing the ability to even talk with my mother anymore. She cannot wrap her brain around all of this and can't accept that the police won't do more or anything. So we just can't even talk. It's like she doesn't get this or doesn't think things are as they are. She keeps thinking the police are going to do something when they've made it perfectly clear they are not. In fact, the police are chalking the latest two incidents up to a bird or an animal and normal wear and tear, despite all evidence to the contrary. Of course, this means no insurance claim for me and carte blanche to continue to slowly destroy my house.
I would challenge you to adopt an "act as if" consciousness . . .instead of saying it's carte blanche to slowly destroy your house, say something along the lines of "the birds or animals in this area are very talented. It is gong to be wonderful when the sale closes. I know the buyers will love this house. The house has many nice features. They will be happy, and I will be happy in my new home. I wish for the highest good for all parties. I forgive everyone for all of the trials and tribulations I have been through recently, and wish everyone the absolute best. I wish my neighbor the best, as well (and do Ho'Oponopono to your neighbor to clean the energy) . . . we are all healthy and happy and everything will be resolved quickly and easily."
Fake it till you make it . . .do not allow yourself to go into negative thought mode or paranoia . . .It takes a lot of discipline but you can do it. Do not have a pity party - instead, really nurture yourself . . .actually take good care of yourself in ways you can actually control - like diet and exercise and massage and whatever it is that brings you happiness and puts a smile on your face.
You CAN do it - you just have some habits to break.
I know what it is like to be challenged and to lose trust and I do understand how easy it is to get bogged down in negativity. But wallowing or fearing the worst will not bring happiness.
Now, if I would only take my own advice, my life would be peachy
I would challenge you to adopt an "act as if" consciousness . . .instead of saying it's carte blanche to slowly destroy your house, say something along the lines of "the birds or animals in this area are very talented. It is gong to be wonderful when the sale closes. I know the buyers will love this house. The house has many nice features. They will be happy, and I will be happy in my new home. I wish for the highest good for all parties. I forgive everyone for all of the trials and tribulations I have been through recently, and wish everyone the absolute best. I wish my neighbor the best, as well (and do Ho'Oponopono to your neighbor to clean the energy) . . . we are all healthy and happy and everything will be resolved quickly and easily."
Fake it till you make it . . .do not allow yourself to go into negative thought mode or paranoia . . .It takes a lot of discipline but you can do it. Do not have a pity party - instead, really nurture yourself . . .actually take good care of yourself in ways you can actually control - like diet and exercise and massage and whatever it is that brings you happiness and puts a smile on your face.
You CAN do it - you just have some habits to break.
I know what it is like to be challenged and to lose trust and I do understand how easy it is to get bogged down in negativity. But wallowing or fearing the worst will not bring happiness.
Now, if I would only take my own advice, my life would be peachy
Well, I think what you say has merit, but I can't control the actions of others. I think what I'll do is back off on the checking up on the place every day as the police blow everything off anyway. Every other day should be good enough and then I can focus on where I do live now.
The good news is I can bypass them completely I found out (anonymously) from my insurance company. They have their own adjusters who will determine things. So that's a good thing!
I must admit though, Imcurious, it's inevitable that one is going to feel bad and sad when one's life's investment is being eaten away at, bit by bit. Even with the two offers I had I was walking away with a loss, but still grateful to be walking away with THAT level of loss.
At any rate, I am not having a "pity party." I am having a level headed business conversation in my head that is saying "Damn, why didn't I sell high this time around when I knew I should?" Had I listened to my inner voice years ago, I would have cashed out quite nicely.
I would request they have a conversation with someone, not to accuse him, rather to plant a seed in his brain that perhaps they are questioning who is doing the damage to my house. For once, I would like them to think things through. Hmm, who really hates her or would have motive and easy access? But I'd be expecting too much to expect them to think this.
Instead? I got told this a.m. that the vandalism was done by a bird or animal. Wow. This is just like before when someone smashed my pool part and put it back under the chaise lounge. I was told then a bird or animal did that too. A very talented bird or animal to both retrieve it from under and put it back I might add.
I'm surprised they haven't asked some questions. Well.... picture your neighbor in a tutu with a guy named Bubba.
Insurance adjuster, given great advice.
Don't use your mom as a sounding board, simple as that.
I see a shift in your energy to the positive.
Oh...and money comes and goes, think loss and loss is what you'll probably manifest.
Well, I think what you say has merit, but I can't control the actions of others. I think what I'll do is back off on the checking up on the place every day as the police blow everything off anyway. Every other day should be good enough and then I can focus on where I do live now.
The good news is I can bypass them completely I found out (anonymously) from my insurance company. They have their own adjusters who will determine things. So that's a good thing!
I must admit though, Imcurious, it's inevitable that one is going to feel bad and sad when one's life's investment is being eaten away at, bit by bit. Even with the two offers I had I was walking away with a loss, but still grateful to be walking away with THAT level of loss.
At any rate, I am not having a "pity party." I am having a level headed business conversation in my head that is saying "Damn, why didn't I sell high this time around when I knew I should?" Had I listened to my inner voice years ago, I would have cashed out quite nicely.
The past is over and gone. There is no point in looking back. What you are doing is "coulda shoulda woulda," and it is for naught. It does not help. Just suck it up and move forward in your mind. Make a list of everything you are grateful for - focus on SOMETHING positive. I would not go back to check on the house at all. No news is good news.
You have to be more careful about how you focus your energy. When you get up in the morning, do something that makes you smile.
As you go about your day, focus on the positive - the beauty around you, your animals, etc. Do you have a hobby? It sounds like you have too much time on your hands and that that leads to dwelling. I think a life coach would be good for you. Someone positive you could talk to daily for 15 minutes until you establish new habits. I think it would be a good investment in your mental health.
It can take many forms. In my case, it was the discovery over years of a duplicitous life of someone I wanted a future with. I still have a hard time coming to terms with it. To top it off, the last time I saw this person he told me my features had changed. Well, he put me through hell (there were other things going on as well) so I guess maybe I've aged. I asked him how but he never told me. I did not take it as a compliment.
I guess my question is how do you move on? Some people DO damage you and then when they turn around and tell you it shows, it's just a slap in the face. I didn't put this in relationships as I think we all are disappointed in life by people. But I can't seem to get past those words "your features have changed."
My whole life has changed drastically in many ways and not for the better. At least not that I can see. So when life really gets you down, how do you pick yourself back up? How do you forget the insults, the setbacks, the failures, and how does one get back on track? My life resembles nothing of my former life. Nothing. And I beat myself up for that although at the time it all made sense on paper.
For one thing, you can't give others that much power over you. You cannot measure your life with the approval of others, and you cannot move forward if you keep living in the past.
The way you pick yourself back up is to convince yourself that life is a series of changes. The past is over and you cannot change it, so why relive it over and over? Even if it was good, you can only get so much mileage out of those fond memories...time to go out and make new ones! No matter how good or bad your life is right now, one thing that is certain is change. Learn how to roll with the changes and remind yourself that you have a choice each day and each moment to do something different. You can sit on the couch and wallow in self pity, anger, hurt, or regret...or, you can go to a museum, art gallery, library, movie, zoo, aquarium, or take a small road trip--just don't sit around and let your problems and worries surround you and ultimately consume you. Bury the past and embrace the future.
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