Why is making friends in Miami so DIFFICULT?? (South Miami, South Beach: how much, school)

[Shoegal1075]

Originally Posted by info411

What bothers me the MOST about ppl here is how FAKE they are and if you are not like them you wont be accepted!! In MIA its NOT about standing out its alot more about fitting IN. Diversity is not welcome and it makes me sick! Is NYC or Chicago like that too? Im not gonna even ask about LA it speaks for its self ...lol

Can't say for chicago but when I was last in Miami and a bum (you guys call them Hobosr right?) was walking down the street talking to himself and swinging at the air, I didn't even blink an eye LOL - and everyone else was walking on the otherside of the street LOL - I probably should have too but I have seen that all the time LOL! Another example - I was in the bowling alley the other day and a kid walks in with a Mohawk about 2 feet tall - everyone and I mean EVERYONE was staring - me and my kids were like oh cool hair and continued to bowl. There is no one set anything in NYC so you can fit in just about anywhere! That I truly do love about NYC. I tend to be on the trendy side so, I'm sure I'll be fine in Miami.

[Shoegal1075]

Originally Posted by allenk893

Because Miami is one of those cities that feels itself too much. The people have a little too much pride with hot bodies they don't have and beautiful women that would never give you or me the time of day. So my verdict is, I don't care for Miami. I think it's a silly and obnoxious culture devoid of true racial diversity and personality. I like Palm Beach County more anyway.

LOL - that is a funny point! What is with all the "BIG" girls on South Beach - I'm still very new to Florida so when hubby and I go out we still swing by SB - what is with all these girls dressing in doll clothes but actually needing adult sizes? I would not catagorize myself as fat but I'm not skinny either, however, I wear things that compliment my shape not things that go against nature and scare people away from you.

[lilred0005]

Originally Posted by Chelsa1075

I have to agree for the most part that is everywhere in the US - people are cliquish by nature.

NYC is a great place but you have to be involoved in something to make friends as you do anywhere. You don't just go to NYC and make friends in the Grocery store or laundromat (at least the first time your there). Maybe you should try those meetup websites and find people with similar interests.

Take a long hard look at yourself and see if there is something that you are doing to turn people off. I don't mean that in a bad way. How old are you that your girlfriends lives are consumed by their boyfriends - your in college, how can you not have a clique of friends from there - I mean schools are a breeding ground for making new friends.

I think ppl do tend to be cliquish(sorry, no sp check) however I do not think it's as bad everywhere else as it is down here. In all fairness, you've only been here a few months, I've lived here my whole life so I know this area really well, plus I'm always asking my transplant friends for their opinions. General consensus is that it is quite difficult to make friends/connections with ppl down here. Ppl tend to be rather unfriendly, keep to themselves, plus you do have the rampant superficiality here too. Look, nothing is set in stone, there are friendly ppl here but you definitely have to look for them as it is not so apparent as in other areas. I like Chelsea's idea of looking on campus for friends/connections. I would try to move to a different area/school like UF or FSU as you are only young once and nothing will replace the true experience of attending a large, busy university. They really will be some of the best yrs of your life, truly priceless and irreplaceable. Take care and good luck!

[Shoegal1075]

Originally Posted by lilred0005

I think ppl do tend to be cliquish(sorry, no sp check) however I do not think it's as bad everywhere else as it is down here. In all fairness, you've only been here a few months, I've lived here my whole life so I know this area really well, plus I'm always asking my transplant friends for their opinions. General consensus is that it is quite difficult to make friends/connections with ppl down here. Ppl tend to be rather unfriendly, keep to themselves, plus you do have the rampant superficiality here too. Look, nothing is set in stone, there are friendly ppl here but you definitely have to look for them as it is not so apparent as in other areas. I like Chelsea's idea of looking on campus for friends/connections. I would try to move to a different area/school like UF or FSU as you are only young once and nothing will replace the true experience of attending a large, busy university. They really will be some of the best yrs of your life, truly priceless and irreplaceable. Take care and good luck!

No offense taken, you are certainly welcome to your opinion as are your friends, but I think the fact you must consider is that they are moving here from another place stating it is difficult to make friends - reverse the roles - do you think it would be less difficult to move to NY and make friends. My point is if you move from here to NYC you may have the same opinions about people and superficiality - don't get me started on either LOL - the greatest difference I find here is the make up of the City - because it isn't this great walkable place it is a little more difficult well, a lot more difficult to have random conversations and things of that nature - I think a better comparison would be to compare Miami to Brooklyn or Queens - I personally don't like the Manhattan comparison as to me there is no comparison - there is nothing like Manhattan in the US (to me) - I like the Brooklyn or Queens comparison better and still I think both queens and brooklyn are busier than Miami but they are drivable like Miami with pretty much the same traffic issues as Miami during rush hour. You can sit at a light in Manhattan for 20 minutes - that doesn't happen in Miami unless there was such a bad car accident that you simply couldn't get by.

[info411]

Princess- i agree that is actually not a bad idea.

Chelsa1075- i do not take offence what so ever i agree and i have though about it, if i do anything wrong? I do think because of my bad experiences with people i have become more closed off and private because i dont want to get burned. However, i do think alot of people here just like to party and i do too BUT that is all ppl do here for fun its either beach or clubs and drinkin ppl dont go out for walks in parks, go to restaurants, bars, meuseums , events... Alot of ppl are very fake and do not know how to just enjoy life ... Its easy to meet people here, its just hard to maintain true friendships because when all you do with someone is just drink and party in a loud room and not remember half of it the next day, its not a good way to make real friends. People here dont get together to out and tlk about things and form relationships. As far as school goes im in a community college not a university so i think its diffrent but i could be wrong.

[Shoegal1075]

Originally Posted by info411

Princess- i agree that is actually not a bad idea.

Chelsa1075- i do not take offence what so ever i agree and i have though about it, if i do anything wrong? I do think because of my bad experiences with people i have become more closed off and private because i dont want to get burned. However, i do think alot of people here just like to party and i do too BUT that is all ppl do here for fun its either beach or clubs and drinkin ppl dont go out for walks in parks, go to restaurants, bars, meuseums , events... Alot of ppl are very fake and do not know how to just enjoy life ... Its easy to meet people here, its just hard to maintain true friendships because when all you do with someone is just drink and party in a loud room and not remember half of it the next day, its not a good way to make real friends. People here dont get together to out and tlk about things and form relationships. As far as school goes im in a community college not a university so i think its diffrent but i could be wrong.

I see - I went to school in NY and made some friends along the way but most of my friends are from high school - however - there are friends that I met at work that I have remained very good friends with - Sweety, I really think you are just experiencing growing up - making friends as you get older just isn't as easy - I can't say whether meeting people on intellectual level will be better for you or not - you seem to have a good balance and that is probably what is hard for you. Others are just one or the other. I wish you luck with finding some REAL friends. I will tell you this - I'm 34 and only have a hand full of true friends the rest I just shoot the crap with.

[NCtoMiami]

It is very hard to make friends down here. In NC i had many friends from different races white, black and asian. We would hangout at starbucks, barnes and noble, eat sushi, dim sum, workout, walk, jog etc. I tried making friends here. So far i have 1 friend. I wanted to start a group for people who want to walk 3 to 8 miles. One person said yes. Walking is fun and free. I don't get it. To top it all off we have neighbors who let their dog crap all over our yard. My husband told them to carry a bag to clean the dog poop. I miss my old neighbourhood in NC dog walkers carried bags if they don't they get fined but many always cleaned.

[info411]

Chelsa1975, thanks for your advice! I agree with you maybe i am just growing up and i dont realize that it is alot harder to make true friends and form bonds especially when everyone has such busy and hectic schedules... And true friends are numbered. More so in a place like MIA where ppl party alot and have money and are fake. I just think if i stay focused on my school and as long as i am myself i will eventually meet the right people along the way.

[WINTERFRONT]

Miami is by no means a party city. That lifestyle is mostly for the rich and the tourists.

[info411]

No i would have to disagree. I think miami is a big party city with all the clubs on south beach there is always ppl there partying gettong drunk...