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Old 12-25-2012, 07:20 PM
 
1,291 posts, read 2,728,743 times
Reputation: 1264

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Most of these are on the money! Enjoy, I sure did.

Missouri according to Jeff Foxworthy:

If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don't even work there, you may live in Missouri.

If you've worn shorts and a jacket at the same time, you may live in Missouri.

If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you may live in Missouri.

If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you may live in Missouri.

If you have switched from 'heat' to 'A/C' and back again in the same day, you may live in Missouri.

If you can drive 75 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching, you may live in Missouri.

If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow, you may live in Missouri.

If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both doors unlocked, you may live in Missouri.

If you carry jumpers in your car and your wife knows how to use them, you may live in Missouri.

If everyone in your family has been on a "float trip." you may live in Missouri.

If the phrase I'm going to the Lake this weekend
has only one meaning, and everyone knows what you're talking about, you
may live in Missouri.

If "Down South" means Arkansas and you know where Idiots Out Wandering Around are located, you might be from Missouri.

If "Vacation" means driving to Silver Dollar City, Worlds of Fun or Six Flags, you might be from Missouri.

If you ever rode a school bus over an hour each way, you might be from Missouri.

If you failed World Geography in school because you
thought Cuba, Versailles, California, Nevada, Houston, Cabool,
Louisiana, Springfield, and Mexico were cities in Missouri (And they are
mind you!), you might be from Missouri.

If you had school classes canceled because of cold, You're probably from Missouri.

If you had school classes canceled because of heat, You're probably from Missouri.

If you can recognize whether another Missourian is
from the Boot Heel, Ozarks, Eastern, Middle or Western Missouri soon as
they open their mouth, You're probably from Missouri.

If you know that Harry S. Truman, Walt Disney,
George Washington Carver and Mark Twain are all from Missouri, Well...
you guessed it.

If you know what "Home of the Throwed Roll" means! You're probably from Missouri.

If you pronounce Missouri with an ah at the end. You're probably from Missouri.

If you think of deer season is a national holiday. You're probably from Missouri.

If you've ever said (or heard) its not the heat, its the humidity. You're probably from Missouri.

If you've seen people wear bib overalls to funerals. You're probably from Missouri.

If your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor. You're probably from Missouri.

If you've seen farmers stop work and remove their hat as a funeral passes by. You're probably from Missouri.

If you actually understand these jokes, send this so all of your Missouri friends and others can see. You definitely do live - or have lived - in Missouri God Bless Ya'll!
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Old 12-26-2012, 10:39 AM
 
12,282 posts, read 11,987,799 times
Reputation: 4978
Should be in the Humor section.
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Old 12-26-2012, 04:20 PM
 
1,291 posts, read 2,728,743 times
Reputation: 1264
This message is hidden because Versatile is on your ignore list.

Last edited by Inoxkeeper; 12-26-2012 at 05:22 PM..
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Old 12-27-2012, 07:54 AM
 
12,282 posts, read 11,987,799 times
Reputation: 4978
Quote:
Originally Posted by Inoxkeeper View Post
This message is hidden because Versatile is on your ignore list.
Hidden from who?
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Old 12-28-2012, 06:36 AM
 
Location: SW MO
23,598 posts, read 34,271,314 times
Reputation: 29239
Quote:
Originally Posted by Versatile View Post
Hidden from who?
Hidden from anyone sick enough of your partisan blather to put you on "ignore."
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Old 12-28-2012, 07:04 AM
 
12,282 posts, read 11,987,799 times
Reputation: 4978
Quote:
Originally Posted by Curmudgeon View Post
Hidden from anyone sick enough of your partisan blather to put you on "ignore."
That is good. Thank you
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Old 12-30-2012, 11:16 AM
 
548 posts, read 952,771 times
Reputation: 965
Well I thought it was funny and totally fits for Missouri!!
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Old 01-09-2013, 03:30 PM
 
Location: Missouri
2 posts, read 4,060 times
Reputation: 10
Amen this is why i love missouri
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Old 01-11-2013, 10:22 PM
 
101 posts, read 287,500 times
Reputation: 89
Yeah I've been to Rome, Athens, and Paris.

Georgia, Texas and Tennessee.
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Old 01-11-2013, 10:52 PM
 
Location: Table Rock Lake
971 posts, read 1,320,878 times
Reputation: 958
Quote:
Originally Posted by JetAgeHobo View Post
Yeah I've been to Rome, Athens, and Paris.

Georgia, Texas and Tennessee.
Iffin that's whats makes you happy, I'm all for you.

Me, I will take the view of the Missouris hills and hollars! That makes me happy. LOL
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