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Umm get a girlfriend with a job, a car,a drivers license, a bank account, or let her move in and either A. get married and you take 100% of the finacial burden or B. not get married and take 100% of the finacial burden.
If I meet a girl that don't have car or a license I don't bother. It's 2010 if you don't have the basic things like a license or a bank acct? wtf? If you think reading that made your head spin see what happens when she moves in.
You need friends to kick some sense into your arse!
Quote:
Originally Posted by JG183
the sitch:
me -- decent paying job, own my residence, some savings, no debts, stable in every sense
she -- no job, no savings, no driver's license, no debts, an "artist"
...living with her parents at the moment, but they're threatening to throw her out on the street....
Yo.. dog! I'm gonna talk to you straight, like you're my own blood.
Are you 1) blinded by infatuation, 2) playing rob the cradle, or 3) both. Once the hero worship wears off, YOU will be the one looking to throw her out on the street. Before moving the gal in, tell her to grow up, take care of herself, and get a f r a c k i n ' J-O-B!!! If she wants a daddy, be one... but not a sugar daddy!
It blows my mind that you would even consider this in the first place! Man, the whoopie must be damn good! You lookin' for a hoochie mama? But even if that's the case, you're thinking with the wrong head!
Quote:
Originally Posted by kjd72
Umm get a girlfriend with a job, a car,a drivers license, a bank account, or let her move in and either A. get married and you take 100% of the finacial burden or B. not get married and take 100% of the finacial burden.
If I meet a girl that don't have car or a license I don't bother. It's 2010 if you don't have the basic things like a license or a bank acct? wtf? If you think reading that made your head spin see what happens when she moves in.
Yo.. dog! usually, saying "WTF" ain't my lingo, but this brother is absolutely right! You move this woman in and guess what you'll be saying a year from now? "WTF was I thinking???"
Listen to your City-Data friends. Me and kjd72 are looking out for you, bro! Don't just run away from this girl... change your phone number too! Get your game on somewhere else!
I think you are all jumping to conclusions without knowing anything.
This woman is an 'artist' so it's not really anything extraordinary that she doesn't currently have a steady job. Maybe she's looking for a next gig? There are plenty of people, from artists to accountants, that are out of a job right now and have been out of a job for a long time.
As for not having a driver's license--maybe she just moved back in with her parents from a place like NYC where it is common not to have a driver's license. I have plenty of 20-40 year old friends in NYC that either never learned to drive in the first place, or let their out of state licenses expire soon after moving to the city and never renewed.
As for no savings--that doesn't necessarily mean that she doesn't have any bank accounts...it just means she doesn't have any savings. And just because the OP claims to have 'some savings' doesn't necessarily mean he's a 'sugar daddy'. What is 'some savings'? I can have $50 in a savings account and say I have 'some savings'.
To this woman's credit, the OP says she has no debts.
To the OP--I have no idea what your deal is, but it's pretty clear you have some SERIOUS trust issues with this chick if you're researching cohabitation and palimony laws in NJ and asking strangers on City Data for relationship advice. Furthermore, it sound like you have very little to no confidence that this woman will live up to your particular standards of 'stability' and be more on an equal playing field with you financially. In that case, I question not only why you would consider letting her move in, I also question why you are with her at all? What kind of a relationship is that?
Why would she able to get any money from you if you let her live in your place and then it didnt work out?
It is not like you are getting married. Unless she lived at your place for 5+ years, I do not see how it would be an issue to let her live with you. (I am not an expert though)
If her own parents are throwing her out, there must be something you either don't know or haven't mentioned. If you "rescue" her then the lesson her parents are trying to teach her will not be learned.
There is no reason why she doesn't have any kind of job - even McDonald's is hiring. Artist is nice, but if it doesn't pay the bills, who is responsible for her? It should not be everyone else, it should be HERSELF.
Umm get a girlfriend with a job, a car, a drivers license, a bank account, or let her move in and either A. get married and you take 100% of the financial burden or B. not get married and take 100% of the financial burden.
If I meet a girl that don't have car or a license I don't bother. It's 2010 if you don't have the basic things like a license or a bank acct? wtf? If you think reading that made your head spin see what happens when she moves in.
yes, I hear you, loud & clear...
sad that we have to consider $$ when it comes to matters of the heart
Yo.. dog! I'm gonna talk to you straight, like you're my own blood.
thank you my virtual brother.
I want to believe in the fairy tale... in fate...
it's the age old "brain vs. heart" debate
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You need friends to kick some sense into your arse!
Don't just run away from this girl... change your phone number too! Get your game on somewhere else!
