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Both are great for different reason and different people in different age groups will give you various answers. As someone who see many apts daily in many areas the uws is my personal fave and where i end up putting the most people, even those who insist on only the east village.
I lived on the UWS for awhile. It's definitely not a "bad" neighborhood but it's not nearly as developed in terms of things to do or places to go. As far as commute goes I'd definitely pick the one with the easier commute. If you have to go from one side of town to the other to get to your job, pick the one that's on the same side as your job. It just makes things less of a hassle in general.
I lived on both sides for many years and left Manhattan about two years ago. UES is really two neighborhoods. One is West of 3rd and one is east of 3rd. West of 3rd is where I lived. Mostly residential, very expensive, quiet, pretty, white people mainly, older demographic, and not very crowded. Not many children either. East of 3rd very different. Many young families, nice parks, limited transportation, significantly less expensive.
I lived on UWS for many years, too. Very crowded. Many restaurants and many more things to do in walking distance, mixed age groups, white but more diversity, more kids, more fun, better transportation, and noisy.
When I was young I liked UWS. When I got older I preferred quiet UES. Children are a whole different subject. Mine are grown and schools are different now. Someone else may help you about that.
Phase One of the Second Avenue Subway will change that upon completion at the end of next year.
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