Does it seem easier hate ugly people? (judgmental, feel, boyfriend)

[Mooseketeer]

Nope, I have never viewed "ugly" people in any negative light, to do so would be shallow and vaccuous beyond belief as your level of attractiveness is something beyond your control and has nothing to do with what you bring to the table as a human being.

I have however an absolute deep seated hatred of superficial and shallow human beings, ugly or beautiful. They make me bristle and I cannot countenance them at any level. I would walk over hot coals to avoid conversing with someone I consider to be vain, self obsessed, rude, thoughtless, selfish, narrow minded and vapid.

Ugly is as ugly does. What makes someone genuinely attractive is not the perfection of their facial features or limbs but how they interact with others and behave towards other human beings ( and animals). Also it is highly subjective. We all have different definitions and criteria.

I have met plenty of people in my time who seemed physically exceptionally attractive but because of their behaviour and demeanour were about as attractive as two rotten planks of wood. I genuinely believe that you light up from within and when that switch is simply not on an "attractive" shell is about as relevant as the holes in Swiss Cheese.

I honestly can't remember ever pre-judging someone based on their looks and assuming their character traits to be more flawed. I have I am ashamed to say sometimes prejudged people by the way they talk or dressed but not the way they looked as this is beyond their control and to me is no indication of character.

All human beings make assumption about others based on a myriad of things, but physical perfection or lack of therein have never truly entered my mind as valid reasons to do so. And it goes both ways. Many people assume that beautiful people are stupid or shallow, or vain and I also refuse to play that game. Both "sides" can be horrible human beings and both "sides" can be lovely. I tend to wait until someone opens their mouth to decide .

[Trimac20]

^ I know you personally don't, mooseketeer, but I'm wondering if you've noticed that ugly people are treated by a different set of standards by most people?

As a rule do people more readily attach negative opinions to people who are physically unattractive?

[crisan]

I guess it is easier for some to hate ugly people. It is no secret that there are people out there looking for the easy way to do things.

[dragonborn]

Originally Posted by Trimac20

^ I know you personally don't, mooseketeer, but I'm wondering if you've noticed that ugly people are treated by a different set of standards by most people?

As a rule do people more readily attach negative opinions to people who are physically unattractive?

Yes, generally "ugly" (though I hate that word) people are treated poorly, indifferently or are even discriminated against. Most people assume that just because someone is physically attractive, they must be beautiful inside too, which more often than not, isn't always the case. I mean, ever wondered why really attractive people can get away with so much more or have no problem finding a partner or even friends? That's the way of the world, unfortunately.

[Mooseketeer]

Originally Posted by Trimac20

^ I know you personally don't, mooseketeer, but I'm wondering if you've noticed that ugly people are treated by a different set of standards by most people?

I do think that yes ugly , disabled , old and large people are definitely treated differently because we do live in an extremely superficial, shallow and IMO narrow minded society. Youth and "beauty" do seem to be attributed values and worth which in my opinion are not warranted.

Perhaps because our modern world is one which is so visual , where we are constantly assaulted with images of photo-shopped "celebrities" who have an interest in keeping themselves set apart from the "normal" populace and are able to do so with every trick at their disposal. The celebrity culture is an assault not only on the senses but the brain and unrealistic images of women and men preened to "perfection" within an inch of their lives has bled into the public subconscious and too many people aspire to what is constantly on their screens, social networks, and gadgets of all sorts.

We equate success with youth and beauty ( and health) and therefore ape those we look up to which sadly in this case often means those whose sole concern is their looks rather than their talents or worth as a human being. Modern society is sexualised very early on, everything is about being sexy, about pandering to certain norms and conforming to very narrow criteria when it comes to physical perfection.

As such when beauty is deemed to be success, equated with talent , goodness and general positive feelings then in reverse "ugly", old, fat, disabled becomes undesirable and generates negative feelings. People become repelled by what is no longer the desired "norm".

But to be fair I think there is also often a certain reverse snobbery when some people also think that a beautiful woman is necessarily stupid or vain or a gorgeous bloke a "Himbo" which is pretty demeaning as well.

Being Ugly , Disabled,Old or Fat does not necessarily make you good either !

For example I often find a certain "mushiness" towards Old People when we often tend to smooth over some pretty distateful traits simply because people are old. I know quite a lot of pretty darn awful nasty, cruel and stupid old people....

We have definitely made a pedestal for those who are deemed physically perfect and this vapid attitude IMO is an indictment on our lack of ability to think for ourselves.

But Beauty has always been valued ( whatever beauty means , we all have different values, a voluptuous Rubenesque woman of the 17th century would be deemed monstrously fat and obese nowadays, standards do change), Artists have always idolised and set apart those with physical perfection. It is nothing new but I cannot help and feel that our overload in audio visual stimulation has made us ALL guilty of looking down on certain traits.

We no longer have freak shows and this would be considered terribly un PC and yet we constantly mock and point the finger at the obese, the old , the not so trendy, the ugly etc.... Look at the number of threads on this forum on fat/ugly people and see how we consider those who do not fit a certain mould.


I am disabled (not in a wheelchair) and gained a lot of weight through having to take Steroids for Cancer treatment for over 10 years ( weight which is proving so , so hard to shift despite regular exercise and a healthy diet, yes people some people can get bigger without sitting on the sofa all day eating cream cakes and burgers!) and I am treated completely differently than I was when I was super fit and slim. People think I am lazy, stupid and I am often ignored in a public setting, my opinions discarded and seen as irrelevant purely because of the way I look.



I am exactly the same person I was years ago but somehow apparently my opinions no longer matter, and it is OK to call me a "fat cow" in a shop if I can't move as quickly as other people because I walk with a stick.


It used to really hurt and upset me but you know what I am 44 now and quite frankly what some moronic 18 year old Bimbo with the emotional intelligence of pond slime and the IQ level of her own excrement thinks is now something I certainly do not lose sleep over.


I have matured enough to dismiss those sorts of comments as pure idiocy and I have never really suffered fools gladly. I will either ignore those or give as good as I get.

I treat people as I wish to be treated regardless of race, colour or creed, sexual orientation or physical appearance. I reserve judgement until I get to know someone whether they look like Aphrodite or Quasimodo.


We do ALL have certain prejudices but I find it a lot more positive to try and keep those to a bare minimum and try to stop myself from assuming too much. I think it is human to make assumptions but you have to have the maturity to then accept you were wrong and change your opinion when facts disprove those prejudices.

Some beautiful people are lovely, kind, sweet, have brilliant minds , some ugly people are nasty, cruel, despicable and very stupid. It makes no sense to assume what the book will be like by looking at the cover in my experience. All you do is miss out on meeting interesting people.

I used to be one of the considered " very attractive" before I lost my health and even then I was always wary about being smug about it as beauty in the end fades and accidents happen.

If you have nothing but your looks then you are a hollow shell IMO. We are all potentially hideous, deformed and "grotesque". It is something a lot of people ought to remember. There for the Grace of God go I is something which is always in my mind ( in an Atheist way ! ).

When I see people with terrible scars, or burns or terrible disabilities it reminds me that I am in many ways lucky but that luck could easily change. Our bodies are a facade and facades crumble and get knocked down. Very easily so too.

So yes we are shallow, we lack compassion and we can be cruel, unthinking, thoughtless and vapid. Modern society certainly has IMO enabled a greater superficiality and we need to be careful or we will truly lose all our humanity and the capacity to empathise with others.

[Raptor76]

Just from my own personal experience, when I was really over weight, I can't say people hated me, but man if looks could kill, I would have died about 500 times over. People would literally look at me with disgust, roll their eyes and move away from me. At work, in meetings, I was basically ignored. drop a few pounds, and all of the sudden, those same people not only smile in my face, but make a point to speak to me, and at work, somehow I am now very bright and highly intelligent. So yeah I don't know if ugly people are hated, but I do believe they have to bring more to the table just to be judged for their own self worth, than people who may be more attractive.

[fellowjoe]

I think we gotta differentiate between romantic relationships and non-romantic ones too.

When it comes to the latter like colleagues and friends, it seems to be the case that good-looking people would have it easier in everything they do.

But for the former, it seems the better-looking women prefer the average-looking and ugly guys. That's from my experience though.

[Lucario]

Originally Posted by MsAnnThrope

Where I live, one has exactly zero to do with the other. Beauty has no colour. A beautiful black woman will be fawned on just as much as a beautiful white woman, if not more because she's viewed as exotic.

People are not automatically more attractive if their skin is lighter because there is so much more (to a thinking adult) that goes into attraction, however you do have a point because in blind tests, black toddlers prefer white dolls over black dolls. It seems it is programmed into ALL of us to prefer lighter skin at some level.

Having said this, you obviously don't know many Germans or Austrians...they are certainly NOT more physically beautiful just because they are fair.

Her obsession with skin color has nothing to do with reality; she has serious psychological issues that need to be addressed.

[Saritaschihuahua]

There's a store I frequent (which shall remain nameless) that has an employee with many facial and head issues. The man is highly intelligent, witty, funny, and a hard worker. He's one of the most popular employees they have, and everyone that walks into the store always gets recognized by him, and likewise, he is always sought after by the patrons of the store and other employees as well.

Originally Posted by Mooseketeer

Nope, I have never viewed "ugly" people in any negative light, to do so would be shallow and vaccuous beyond belief as your level of attractiveness is something beyond your control and has nothing to do with what you bring to the table as a human being.

I have however an absolute deep seated hatred of superficial and shallow human beings, ugly or beautiful. They make me bristle and I cannot countenance them at any level. I would walk over hot coals to avoid conversing with someone I consider to be vain, self obsessed, rude, thoughtless, selfish, narrow minded and vapid.

Ugly is as ugly does. What makes someone genuinely attractive is not the perfection of their facial features or limbs but how they interact with others and behave towards other human beings ( and animals). Also it is highly subjective. We all have different definitions and criteria.

I have met plenty of people in my time who seemed physically exceptionally attractive but because of their behaviour and demeanour were about as attractive as two rotten planks of wood. I genuinely believe that you light up from within and when that switch is simply not on an "attractive" shell is about as relevant as the holes in Swiss Cheese.

I honestly can't remember ever pre-judging someone based on their looks and assuming their character traits to be more flawed. I have I am ashamed to say sometimes prejudged people by the way they talk or dressed but not the way they looked as this is beyond their control and to me is no indication of character.

All human beings make assumption about others based on a myriad of things, but physical perfection or lack of therein have never truly entered my mind as valid reasons to do so. And it goes both ways. Many people assume that beautiful people are stupid or shallow, or vain and I also refuse to play that game. Both "sides" can be horrible human beings and both "sides" can be lovely. I tend to wait until someone opens their mouth to decide .

[chuck_steak]

Originally Posted by Raptor76

Just from my own personal experience, when I was really over weight, I can't say people hated me, but man if looks could kill, I would have died about 500 times over. People would literally look at me with disgust, roll their eyes and move away from me. At work, in meetings, I was basically ignored. drop a few pounds, and all of the sudden, those same people not only smile in my face, but make a point to speak to me, and at work, somehow I am now very bright and highly intelligent. So yeah I don't know if ugly people are hated, but I do believe they have to bring more to the table just to be judged for their own self worth, than people who may be more attractive.

Same thing here. I lost over 220 pounds and am now treated so much better than when I was almost 400 pounds. I still walk with a stick, but that doesn't seem to bother people. I had someone tell me to "waddle into my apartment" years ago because I parked in the handicapped spot...I have handicapped plates, but he was upset because his friends couldn't park there. they were in their 20's and fully able-bodied. I was so mad I called the police on him and he got a full dressing down by them. That stuff stopped right there. He never bullied me again.

By the same token when I would have to go to the hospital ( had many health issues being that large) people there would also treat me with disdain because of my size. I had to go back recently, after having not gone for several years, and was treated like a queen compared to my past treatment. there was no rolling of the eyes, no making a big deal of how many it would take to move me, telling me the machines wouldn't handle my weight, generally making feel bad about my size. Before I literally had a x-ray tech scream at me because I couldn't stand by myself (I was in a wheelchair at the time because of my knees needing to be replaced). The x-ray tech I had this time was pleasant and helpful and couldn't have been any nicer.

I really, really feel for obese people and the way they are treated by everyone because I've been there. It irks me to no end that people smile and treat me "normal" now knowing that if it was someone else they'd be treated like dirt by the same person.