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Recently, my son and his GF had a baby. When they took the mom to her room, I noticed a white board in the room that included essential information like the name of the on duty nurse, the assigned patient care technician, her level of pain/discomfort, etc. The board also included the baby's name, and a line for "Support Person," which had my son's name written beside it. Okay, I have a problem with that. He's not a "Support Person," he's the father. Have we reached a point in our society that we have become so "politically correct," (btw, I absolutely detest that term) that we no longer acknowledge the role of the father? I understand that there are many non-traditional families, and often the father is absent. But, when did we make that the default familial structure?
Now, some might say, "what's the big deal." It was just some words on a White Board, to which I would say, if it wasn't a big deal, why did they feel the need to change the title from father (which was once the commonly accepted term) to "support person." To me, these are two entirely different roles/functions. The "Support Person" is there primarily for the benefit of the mother and is clearly in a subordinate role, their function is usually temporary, and they have limited authority. The father on the other hand, has an equal biological/legal connection as the mother, his function is permanent, and his input is authoritative (as opposed to having no legal voice). Even if the purpose of the board is purely informational, wouldn't the distinction between whether someone is there as a "support person" or "parent" be important?
Most importantly, it reinforces the denigration of a very important role in our society. is it any wonder that we see more men failing to step up to their responsibilities, when subtle messages like this are constantly reinforced. Why not celebrate the positive models of fatherhood, rather than accept the negative ones as the new norm?
I acknowledge I have my own issues/biases around this topic, so I'm curious as to whether others see this as a valid issue, or if its much to do about nothing? If you think it is an important issue, what would you do/have done?
The father could be absent due to being out of town or other legit reasons. The support person could be the sister, the mother, or even you. I do think you are reading way too much into this. Support Person also refers to anyone who assisted with the delivery like a friend, or relative other than the husband and again, for legit reasons he may not have been present.
I don't see it as a big deal. What if the support person changed over the course of the stay. Its not being PC, its just being neutral. What if the birth father is MIA? What if the father is deployed? What if the father is off on work duty and mom went into labor unexpectedly. So so many variables here
Oh and to answer this question:
"wouldn't the distinction between whether someone is there as a "support person" or "parent" be important?"
IN a hospital stay after the birth? not really. the purpose of the white board is so the nurses and support staff know who to address when the mother and "support person" are in the room.
As others have pointed about, this is not about political correctness. The hospital means something very specific when they say "support person," and it's not a substitute for "father."
You made my point exactly. I guess I'm not sure of the point you were trying to make in relation to Zentrop'a response.
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