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Got a text from Mom yesterday just saying "I love you" ...ugh and the guilt gets worse.
I understand how you feel. It's almost like you are getting mixed message's. I always felt that the word "love" is thrown around too easily. If you truly LOVE me then show me with your actions and behavior. (This were my Mom and I part ways). Regarding the text, she may truly "love" you but the way she show's it may not be the way you like. Or it may not be the way you think a loving mother-daughter relationship should be. Would you consider going to family counseling?
I understand how you feel. It's almost like you are getting mixed message's. I always felt that the word "love" is thrown around too easily. If you truly LOVE me then show me with your actions and behavior. (This were my Mom and I part ways). Regarding the text, she may truly "love" you but the way she show's it may not be the way you like. Or it may not be the way you think a loving mother-daughter relationship should be. Would you consider going to family counseling?
Yes I agree actions should show it, not just words.
Family counseling just isn't possible since we live over an hour and a half away, esp with working full time.
My birth mother does this as well. She cheated on my dad when I was 2 and abandoned us. She had another son in another state and repeated the exact same thing with him. All my life she would call and say she was coming to get me at Christmas and never show. Then as I got older and tired of hearing it I began to stand my ground. The promises turned to insults and she began telling me how she wished I had never been born, how I was a mistake, might not belong to my father who raised me.... etc.... She often would call and cry about how she was a horrible mom and she really wanted to have a life with me in it.... only to call back later that night drunk and on a rampage.
I tried a couple times to talk to her about it and it just got worse, so eventually I decided I could live a happier life if she wasn't in it. She still periodically calls my dad asking for my number and he no longer gives it to her. She hasn't bothered me in over 6 years now. While I hate not really having a relationship with my mother, I am relieved that I don't have a volatile relationship instead. I'm much happier now that she's out of the picture.
Sometimes it's a hard choice, but a necessary one. Good luck either way.
Got a text from Mom yesterday just saying "I love you" ...ugh and the guilt gets worse.
Right?! Yeah.... sorry Camille! I'm sure she DOES love you. Of course she does. She might not love you the way you wanted to be loved...and want to be loved now, but Camille, yes....she does love you.
My family is my tribe wherever I find them. The baggage that comes with blood is often toxic. The friendships I form are stronger bonds....or can be, than the obligations of the familial drek.
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I'm sure she DOES love you. Of course she does. She might not love you the way you wanted to be loved...and want to be loved now, but Camille, yes....she does love you. 
