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My husband and I recently moved, and his entire family (including a 3 year old baby) came up to help us move, celebrate Thanksgiving and navigate Black Friday madness to furnish the place.
I really do love his family, and I'm VERY grateful for how they've helped us when they could've stayed home and enjoyed a real Thanksgiving.
Which is why I feel like a complete asshoIe about this issue -- I get exhausted from being "on" for days on end, 24/7.
It's been 3 days now. For the first 2 days, I was able to turn on the charm 100%, and be all smiles and make them feel good.
But now, after days of us being together 24/7, sleeping in our small 1br/1ba with 7 people, and driving myself insane constantly trying to clean up the insane messes they make (our carpet is already ruined after only one day living there!!), and accommodating a really demanding/hyperactive 3yo baby, I'm seriously wiped. All this on top of dealing with moving and Thanksgiving at the same time.
There's literally no room in the living room for me to sit, because we have no chairs or sofa (husband doesn't think they're important), and everyone's clutter is just carelessly scattered everywhere....it looks like an episode of Hoarders! !!!
So I'm lounging in our bedroom, because it's the only clean, peaceful room. And I get some alone time.
But my husband thinks I'm being antisocial, and everyone expects me to socialize nonstop. Even when I try to be "on", it isn't very convincing.
Again, I don't want to come off ungrateful, but that's exactly why I want to figure out how to increase my social stamina so I can be a good host for the next few days.
Maybe it's because I'm not used to typical families. I came from a really small, introverted family, where everyone just did their own thing.
But now, after days of us being together 24/7, sleeping in our small 1br/1ba with 7 people, and driving myself insane constantly trying to clean up the insane messes they make (our carpet is already ruined after only one day living there!!), and accommodating a really demanding/hyperactive 3yo baby, I'm seriously wiped. All this on top of dealing with moving and Thanksgiving at the same time.
There's literally no room in the living room for me to sit, because we have no chairs or sofa (husband doesn't think they're important), and everyone's clutter is just carelessly scattered everywhere....it looks like an episode of Hoarders! !!!
So I'm lounging in our bedroom, because it's the only clean, peaceful room. And I get some alone time.
But my husband thinks I'm being antisocial, and everyone expects me to socialize nonstop. Even when I try to be "on", it isn't very convincing.
Again, I don't want to come off ungrateful, but that's exactly why I want to figure out how to increase my social stamina so I can be a good host for the next few days.
Maybe it's because I'm not used to typical families. I came from a really small, introverted family, where everyone just did their own thing.
Don't let your husband get to you, you're perfectly normal and your family is at least as "typical" as your in-laws. A family of 7 who voluntarily spends a long holiday week in a 1br/1ba apartment with no chairs or sofa? That sounds atypical to me, and borderline nuts.
I, too, am an introvert and feel like you when I don't get my alone time.
When we first moved to our current home, we hosted Thanksgiving. My parents stayed with us and other family members stayed in nearby hotels. I was going nuts trying to make dinner, etc. Then my Dad announced to me that he invited family members who lived nearby to drop in and visit for a while! These family members were cousins who lived nearby and never wanted to visit with us or keep in touch. With one of them, even though he lived about 5 miles from us, we were never invited into his home.
Well, after I heard that, I lost it! Literally, I cried. When they came, I had to retreat to the bedroom to pull myself together. Meanwhile, my dad told everybody that I wasn't feeling well, which didn't help because everybody thought it was a physical illness and kept asking me what was wrong.
When I got my house back after Thanksgiving, I was so glad!
How long will your in-laws be there? Is it possible for you to go out and take a walk just to get away for a while? Don't worry abut being rude. Just say that you need to have a little exercise.
Op- your problems are very simple . Take heed and do not let this happen again. Set good firm boundaries.
1) In the process of a move, do not ever offer to host Thanksgiving or any big holiday.
2) You have a one bedroom apartment and no living room furniture. Why in the world do you need help moving, other than with one bedroom set/ kitchen table ? That's your hubby and one or two friends or relatives. It does not require a mob staying for days. An afternoon will do for the heavy stuff. Boxes you and he deal with as you get to it.
3). Your apartment is too small to have overnight guests greater than one or two. Seven including a toddler is insane. Let them understand that motels and hotels will need to be used.
4) People do not have to come visit overnight for days on end so they can go shopping.
You sound as if you may be newly married. Sit down with your hubby and discuss this situation so it never occurs in the future. This is your house too. Relatives do not decide when they come . They wait for invitations. You and your husband, together, decide on who comes, how long they will stay. He's does not decide alone.
This holiday was totally out of control. It does not have to be this way. Get on the same page with your hubby and figure out how to do family visits better. What you've got going on is exhausting chaos. It does not have to be this way.
Read up some on introverts vs. extroverts. You can't help what you are. Introverts energy is drained by interacting with other people. Extroverts become energized interacting with other people. Most introverts can last hours at a party, not days, before they need some alone time to recharge. If you decide you are an introvert make sure your husband knows this about you so that he isn't constantly frustrated by your need to withdraw from social situations to recharge.
this is why people drink on the holidays for tolerance
as one old boss use to say "you piled the shyt too high"
meaning a move, a holiday, too many relatives, too close, no defragment time....
do your best and learn from it.....that's all you can do
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and subject me to stupid small talk. 
