Was it rude for my co worker to blow me off? (present, appropriate)
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
OP - I think a suggestion would be to give this woman a little plant or box of candy as a nice gesture. Perhaps with a little note saying something like - I apologize for any misunderstanding.
Then leave it at that, and don't ever bring up religion/church again in the workplace.
Realize that a plant or box of candy would show a little good faith on your part, but don't expect her to talk with you after that. Let it go.
You also may want to talk with someone about why you were so emotionally invested in bringing this woman to church ? Perhaps this is a pattern of yours ? It all had to do with what is going on with you, but know that's it highly inappropriate to treat people in this manner.
I was told many years ago not to discuss or mention anything remotely related to religion at work.
Good point. Workplaces are for work no matter what religion you are. It gets to me when people try to invite me to their church or sell raffle tickets for their church or jokingly tell me that ok, I'm going to help you with this task - they they had to anyway, the boss asked them to - only if you buy a ticket for my church.
Or get, this, it pisses me off when they had bible study group at work during lunch hour and they made me look stupid when I said I was not joining; I preferred to go out and eat, like God intended.
Workplaces are agnostic and this kind of behavior is downright discriminatory towards people of other religions. FYI I am Christian, but I have my church. I really resented when my coworker insisted that I go to his church.
My advice: do not bring it up and do not invite anybody from work ever. Who knows, maybe this woman is agnostic or has other faith and only agreed to be polite - like I did with that guy. Just like your coworker, I pretended that nothing happened. if he had asked I would have said I forgot.
Sounds like she has been trying to nicely decline and you won't let it go. Now I don't see her as so rude for not answering her phone when you called.
As a polite person who has zero interest in going to church, I probably would have done the same thing. If you want to continue to be her friend, no more church/religion/God talk.
Honestly, if I were in her place I wouldn't want to hang out with you anymore just for being too pushy.
I thought of something else when I read the title of this thread...
meetoo <@
Quote:
Originally Posted by slingshot
Oh!!! I'm sorry. When my wife and I first read the title of this thread we thought it was about "foolin around" in the workplace. If it really is, the answer is, 'no way'.
now i feel like i need to go to church and ask the priest for forgiveness. "...its been 5 years since my last confession."
People are people. All this stuff about not bringing up religion (or politics, or world events, romantic interest, blah blah blah) in the work place is turning people into machines. When about 40% of your waking life is spent with people you work with, sometimes this stuff will come up, as they are human topics regardless of what HR says or what policies are in place. Everyone who indicated otherwise on this thread I would bet has brought all these topics up in a work environment at one time or another. Probably most without realizing it. If not I kinda pity them, but I would expect them to go far as they are the perfect soulless drones that modern corporations seek but have a hard time finding
That being said, it is all about a safe work environment. If people don't want to hear your thoughts on non-work related stuff you should stow them. Also if your non work related talking starts cutting into your actual work (I don't think occasional conversations do, consider it "team building") you should curtail your discussions. Use common sense, if such a thing still exists.
As to the ops issue specifically, he (assuming he but applies to she too) obviously is a bit too emotionally invested if his invite to a religious function was turned down but s/he is taking it personally.
Honestly, I would have turned you into HR for badgering me about going to church.
This just isn't cool.
While your heart may be in the right place, you really can't do this to people.
" BADGERING " please...
He may not have asked her to church (he said he 'told' her) but I'd hardly use the term badgering...
And it's people like you then, that keep people in HR employed... If she didn't have the guts to tell him 'no herself' - why 'rely' on HR to let him know he was out of line... we're out of high school...
What was rude was you pushing yourself and your beliefs on your co-worker, bringing up church over and over when she clearly demonstrated she didn't want to go by laughing you off. You couldn't or wouldn't accept her refusal so she yes'd you to shut you up.
Sorry, OP, but if anyone was out of line in this whole thing, it was you. I'm not sure why you kept bringing it up even when it was made clear it wasn't welcome and I'd be uber uncomfortable, and being a polite person, I'd probably have done the same since saying no more than once wasn't enough of an answer for you.
I'm in fact having a hard time believing you are serious for thinking she was rude. I read through the whole thing so saw where you clarified that you "told her" she was coming to church with you and wouldn't take her non-committal as refusal but kept egging her on until she really had no choice but to agree without becoming rude/blunt/nasty.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Oh!!! I'm sorry. 
Was it rude for my co worker to blow me off?
just kidding
