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Every year, on the last work day before the Jewish New Year (a floating holiday) I send out an e-mail blast greeting. Usually I have a picture of a Jewish shofar or rams' horn. Below is a missive I plan to send out in early September, in anticipation of the Jewish New Year. The picture will still be there but the message is not a happy one.
I have discussed one such situation on here, Starting to Think of Unfriending "Real Life" Close Friend , involving someone who has been a close friend since 1972. I have had no arguments or disagreements with any of my erstwhile friends, colleagues and acquaintances. Except for perfunctory condolence notes and in some cases small donations to our synagogue, it has been "radio silence" from many. Two of my friends, my wife and my two children have stuck by me; that's it.
Normally, I am a happy and optimistic person. I do not enjoy writing in this manner. I plan on making myself the primary addressee, with a blind copy to my real life friends and acquaintances, present and former.
I would like suggestions or edits to my little missive below.
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Normally, at this season I send out a "happy new year" communication. I cannot do so this year.
Over the past three years, I have had a never – ending stream of losses. My wife, children and siblings have been devoted through these three difficult years. Unfortunately, I have lost my job, and a good portion of my remaining friends and acquaintances during this period.
Hopefully, there is dawn after the darkness. I anticipate and expect things will get better. On that note, I wish all of my friends, past, present and future a happy and healthy new year.
Normally, at this season I send out a "happy new year" communication. I cannot do so this year.
But you do exactly what you say you cannot do here....
Quote:
Originally Posted by jbgusa
On that note, I wish all of my friends, past, present and future a happy and healthy new year.
Quote:
Originally Posted by jbgusa
Over the past three years, I have had a never – ending stream of losses. My wife, children and siblings have been devoted through these three difficult years. Unfortunately, I have lost my job, and a good portion of my remaining friends and acquaintances during this period.
Your friends that you are sending this to already know all that, right? No need to dwell on the negative....
Quote:
Originally Posted by jbgusa
Hopefully, there is dorm after the darkness. I wish and expected things will get better.
Dorm??
Wish and expected... or wish and expect?
Personally, I would not send this out at all. What do you expect to get from doing so?
Every year, on the last work day before the Jewish New Year (a floating holiday) I send out an e-mail blast greeting. Usually I have a picture of a Jewish shofar or rams' horn. Below is a missive I plan to send out in early September, in anticipation of the Jewish New Year. The picture will still be there but the message is not a happy one.
I have discussed one such situation on here, Starting to Think of Unfriending "Real Life" Close Friend , involving someone who has been a close friend since 1972. I have had no arguments or disagreements with any of my erstwhile friends, colleagues and acquaintances. Except for perfunctory condolence notes and in some cases small donations to our synagogue, it has been "radio silence" from many. Two of my friends, my wife and my two children have stuck by me; that's it.
Normally, I am a happy and optimistic person. I do not enjoy writing in this manner. I plan on making myself the primary addressee, with a blind copy to my real life friends and acquaintances, present and former.
I would like suggestions or edits to my little missive below.
================================================== =======================
Normally, at this season I send out a "happy new year" communication. I cannot do so this year.
Over the past three years, I have had a never – ending stream of losses. My wife, children and siblings have been devoted through these three difficult years. Unfortunately, I have lost my job, and a good portion of my remaining friends and acquaintances during this period.
Hopefully, there is dorm after the darkness. I wish and expected things will get better. On that note, I wish all of my friends, past, present and future a happy and healthy new year.
What is the point of your email?
IMHO, either send your usually holiday greeting (perhaps, briefer) or do not send any at all.
The people who stood by you know who they are and what does it matter about the rest of your fair-weather friends.
But you do exactly what you say you cannot do here....
Your friends that you are sending this to already know all that, right? No need to dwell on the negative....Personally, I would not send this out at all. What do you expect to get from doing so?
Quote:
Originally Posted by germaine2626
What is the point of your email?
IMHO, either send your usually holiday greeting (perhaps, briefer) or do not send any at all.
The people who stood by you know who they are and what does it matter about the rest of your fair-weather friends.
The point of the email is to call out the 10 or so people to which this applies. I have done lots for them over the years, professionally and personally. Never did I expect to have a summer with few tennis games, no dinner plans with other couples, and, as I pointed out in the link, actual hang-ups on phone calls without a return call at a better time.
Agree. The whole email seems whining and juvenile. If you're that angry send them a personal note, call, or do what other people do - cut them out of your life.
Over the past three years, I have had a never – ending stream of losses. My wife, children and siblings have been devoted through these three difficult years. Unfortunately, I have lost my job, and a good portion of my remaining friends and acquaintances during this period.
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Instead of the above ^How about writing something like this?:
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The past three years have been difficult ones. I'm thankful for my wife, children, siblings and my friends who have been devoted through these three years.
I anticipate and expect things will get better. On that note,I wish all of my family and friends a happy and healthy new year.
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Then leave it at that. Your true friends will know that you are talking about them. Perhaps, with your true friends, to reinforce your message, put a personal note in the email that goes to them letting them know how much they mean to you and thank them for sticking with you.
You are using a Happy New Year's message as a way to "call out" others?
Resentments possibly?
It is not your place to "call out" others. If they did something all that bad, Karma will do it for you. And losing a job and having losses and pain is a part of life. Some people don't deal very well with other people going through rough times and will take off like roaches do when a light is turned on. I lost a baby when she was 2 days old. I had some "friends" and family members say nothing to me. I had people I barely knew come to me during that painful time.
Try to release the negative thoughts towards others, move on with your life and make next year a better one. Be grateful for your family and anyone who has been there for you. Be conscientious to be there for them as well when they need a shoulder to lean on.
I will re-read these thoughts, and thank you for your posts. Hopefully there will be more.
It does seem that no one understands that calling your closes friend, to tell him that your mother died and being hung up on hurts. Especially when the called person says, "I can't talk now but before I hang up, set aside the night of May 2 for my daughter's wedding." And says "uh-huh" when I mention my mother's parting.
Does anyone get that that is not something that you "let go of" so easily?
I will re-read these thoughts, and thank you for your posts. Hopefully there will be more.
It does seem that no one understands that calling your closes friend, to tell him that your mother died and being hung up on hurts. Especially when the called person says, "I can't talk now but before I hang up, set aside the night of May 2 for my daughter's wedding." And says "uh-huh" when I mention my mother's parting.
Does anyone get that that is not something that you "let go of" so easily?
I get it! It was a horrible thing for this so-called friend to do to you.
The best thing to do is to completely cut off someone like that. I've had people that I thought were friends who got to the point where the only time they called me was when they wanted something. Once I picked up the pattern, I didn't call them again.
And, yes, it is hard to let go of so easily. However, it must be done.
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Every year, on the last work day before the Jewish New Year (a floating holiday) I send out an e-mail blast greeting. Usually I have a picture of a Jewish shofar or rams' horn. Below is a missive I plan to send out in early September, in anticipation of the Jewish New Year. The picture will still be there but the message is not a happy one. 
