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Oh, I've been bullied, even as an adult. But the point is, the OP apologized and tried to make it right. I am not saying that things should be easy and wonderful between them now, but the SIL seems to want to carry her hate through her whole life, even when it impacts her family. And HS is over. I understand totally that her experience was traumatic, but it is over. And we aren't even sure she was bullied. OP says she ignored her. That's not bullying.
I've posted my last on this. OP has not come back, so I am beginning to doubt that she was sincerely interested in fixing this. Whatever, I've said my piece.
I really do feel bad. She had a terrible hygiene issue in H.S and I kinda felt like if I said something I would be associated with it. Im older now and know that those H.S things aren't the end of the world.
My son does love his aunt and my husband isn't super family oriented. He visit his mother every so often and the only person he interacts with is one of his close sisters. He has told me before he could care less if our son knows the rest of them or not. So if my son will know any of them its kind of on me. It has made it difficult because when my son ask when he will see that aunt or if he can call her and she doesn't answer. For his past birthday (when she was still speaking to my friend) she called my friends phone to wish him happy birthday. I guess now that they are not talking she won't see him at all.
I just feel like its been so long. Im planning a big trip for the summer since the rest of all have kids and I figured we could to disney land or something. I know she doesn't have and kids yet but I do want to invite her.
You have apologized, you gone out of your way to be nice, heck you are even nicer to her than her siblings. DROP THE ROPE..Youve tried, she sounds immature and petty. And now she is taking it out on your kid, no way. You can be civil, but stop ingratiating yourself to her.
OK, as someone who had a perfectly miserable HS life, I have to say that you can carry your unhappiness around with you or you can figure out how to be happy. I chose the latter way. And I didn't exactly have anyone to guide me through this either.
You make choices. You figure out that people don't like other people who are bitter. You decide you want to be liked, so you make sure to change your attitude and speech. You notice that hard workers are respected more than slackers. So you become a hard worker. You notice the way other women dress, and you are influenced by that as well. You discover you are passive aggressive, and you try really hard to change.
People don't have to carry bitterness over HS experiences around with them. Doing so is a choice. And it makes them and everyone around them miserable.
Most people don't see the people they went to HS with once HS is over with. Other than maybe at their 20th reunion. In that case your logic works.
That's the not the scenario here, they're connected now through marriage, and to add to it the OP's mother in law seems to be quite ill.
Your suggestions don't apply here.
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