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I need some advice. So several days ago I went to this lunch thing with some classmates and professors from my school. I already arrived there tipsy (had a glass of wine after a small lunch). I ended up drinking about three glasses of wine at the luncheon. I think I might have flirted with my professor. I put my hand on his shoulder and probably talking nonsense. While I was talking to him I didn't have a glass of wine in hand but only water as I was trying to sober up! He looked visibly uncomfortable. I suddenly took my hand off and said 'ok bye now.' He is my professor until next year! I feel so embarrassed! If you were him what would you think of me? Some silly student? I don't have a thing for him. And also he isn't that much older than me, I am 31 he is probably around 38! Just to give you guys an idea.
I just want to put this behind me and pretend it never happened! Was I out of line?
I am mortified!!! What shall I do? If you were my professor would it be awkward seeing me once a week at school??????
Yes, you were out of line. Actually, you screwed up pretty bad.
I imagine he was uncomfortable for several reasons. One is universities usually have a rule about professors dating/having romantic relations with their students. He may have thought you were giving the other professors the impression that you two were more than just student/professor. Some schools have big time consequences for that kind of thing. Or, he may just have been turned off by someone obviously drunk hanging on him and talking nonsense.
I don't think there's any pretending nothing happened. Go and apologize to him. Since he's only 38, he'll probably be understanding about what happened. And if he's good looking, you're probably not the first one to come on to him .
I would say something. I would go up to him privately and tell him the wine hit you harder than you expected and you're sorry if you made him uncomfortable. yes, it will suck and be embarrassing, but you will be going a long way in earning his respect again in doing so, IMO. It will also make the rest of the year much more comfortable for YOU, otherwise you're going to feel weird for the rest of the year. Once you apologize you can both out it behind you.
You're not dumb. We've all woken up the "day after" going "OMG, why did I do that??". Forgive yourself, ok?
Well yes I agree about professor/student dating! That is wrong and I agree!
I wasn't even thinking of flirting while we were talking lol! I honestly am too embarrassed to apologize! I just feel going to lecture and pretend nothing ever happened is my safest bet!
Yes he is ok looking but it's not like I was crushing on him. He is my professor! So that never crossed my mind! I am afraid he will always think of me being that girl who has a thing for him! Which is a nightmare.
I would say something. I would go up to him privately and tell him the wine hit you harder than you expected and you're sorry if you made him uncomfortable. yes, it will suck and be embarrassing, but you will be going a long way in earning his respect again in doing so, IMO. It will also make the rest of the year much more comfortable for YOU, otherwise you're going to feel weird for the rest of the year. Once you apologize you can both out it behind you.
You're not stupid. We've all woken up the "day after" going "OMG, why did I do that??". Forgive yourself, ok?
Thank you for your response. But I don't think I can muster the courage to even bring it up. Heck I can't even think about it! I live in Europe so drinking wine is very common. I seriously feel he will be awkward again even bringing it up. Ugh we have class again Tuesday I don't know what to do!
Apologize, laugh it off and let it go. This is not a big screwup - I went to a very competitive college for undergrad and I saw my professors drunk more times than I can count. You didn't grab his butt - you just intruded on his personal space a bit and were a little too chatty. You're 31 and he's 38 - you are well into adulthood and reasonable adults do not read too much into this kind of thing.
Thank you for your response. But I don't think I can muster the courage to even bring it up. Heck I can't even think about it! I live in Europe so drinking wine is very common. I seriously feel he will be awkward again even bringing it up. Ugh we have class again Tuesday I don't know what to do!
The next best thing (IMO) is to put a note in his mailbox...sorry, I drank a little too much Saturday and acted a little foolishly....I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable and I hope we can start with a clean slate.
IF he thinks you are crushing on him, it's going to be way more awkward than you saying it just came from being tipsy, and letting him know he doesn't have to worry about you.
Apologize, laugh it off and let it go. This is not a big screwup - I went to a very competitive college for undergrad and I saw my professors drunk more times than I can count. You didn't grab his butt - you just intruded on his personal space a bit and were a little too chatty. You're 31 and he's 38 - you are well into adulthood and reasonable adults do not read too much into this kind of thing.
My friends tell me to pretend nothing ever happened and to never ever make small talk with him again!
Thanks for your inputs.
Since you have shot down and given excuses as to why you can't do what has been suggested above it appears you are going to have to be an adult and decide for yourself what to do to fix this little mess you have created.
Have a glass of wine with lunch and think about it, good luck.
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