Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
And people wonder why more women don't come forward. Yes, she made some bad choices, but that does not at all absolve the guy for taking advantage of the situation.
She might not have much to stand on with regards to recourse. If she can handle it, she can talk to this acquaintance and let him know what she remembered and that what he did was wrong. Other than that, now she knows that she can't trust him and that she needs to make better decisions in the future. It's a crappy situation all around.
OK, so they got into bed. started making out, at some point she fell asleep, they were cuddling, he wanted some more action and started fondling her again (perhaps hoping to wake her up in a sexy way)... she woke up and said no.
I m not seeing the gross violation here.
Did the guy even know she was blacked out? Or did he assume she was just dozing?
At any point in the story SHE could have changed the outcome
1. SHE could have drank less
2. SHE could have accepted a ride from someone she trusted and knew better (but because of "1" she was thinking with a clouded mind
3. SHE could have called a cab (see #2)
4. SHE could have gone to her own house instead of his
5. SHE could have resisted going in his bed
Ps.....With all of the above 5 SHE was giving the green light and at any break in the 1,2,3,4 or 5 SHE could have changed the outcome
There are women who are definitely raped that are not at all compliant and because of women like this they are not believed.
BTW....I am a woman and would NEVER get myself into a situation like this.
OK, so they got into bed. started making out, at some point she fell asleep, they were cuddling, he wanted some more action and started fondling her again (perhaps hoping to wake her up in a sexy way)... she woke up and said no.
I m not seeing the gross violation here.
Did the guy even know she was blacked out? Or did he assume she was just dozing?
Totally agree. Some of the comments are pretty disgusting and surprising since similar stories have been in the news. Most recently the Brock Turner situation. I wonder if those of you blaming the girl in this scenario also blamed Brock Turner's victim?
Why would it be surprising? The media and the woman we are about to elect as our president, in part because she is a "champion for women", have been victim blaming the victims of her own husband for decades now. "Victim blaming" is only wrong when it's expedient for it to be so. If our own soon to be president can do it, and be hailed as a forward thinking feminist while she does so, why can't the rest of us?
I don't know, maybe these days when you go to bed with a guy, he has to verbally ask for consent at every level of intimacy. In my day, getting into bed and making out with a guy meant I was going to get cuddled and touched even if I was asleep. That's why I was there!
Why would it be surprising? The media and the woman we are about to elect as our president, in part because she is a "champion for women", have been victim blaming the victims of her own husband for decades now. "Victim blaming" is only wrong when it's expedient for it to be so. If our own soon to be president can do it, and be hailed as a forward thinking feminist while she does so, why can't the rest of us?
But you know its different for Hillary....She lives under a different set of rules than the rest of us common folk!!
For some crazy reason it won't pull in just 68551 quote so:
First you asked...
Can we not agree that HER actions caused what happened?
Then you said.......
At any point in the story SHE could have changed the outcome
1. SHE could have drank less--This did not cause her to be touched inappropriately
2. SHE could have accepted a ride from someone she trusted and knew better (but because of "1" she was thinking with a clouded mind This did not cause her to be touched inappropriately
3. SHE could have called a cab (see #2) This did not cause her to be touched inappropriately
4. SHE could have gone to her own house instead of his This did not cause her to be touched inappropriately
5. SHE could have resisted going in his bed This did not cause her to be touched inappropriately
Again I will say she was too drunk to make a decision. How about flip it? Where is his responsibility?
1. HE should have realized she had too much to drink
2. HE could have offered to bring her back to her house
3. HE could have called her a cab to help her out
4. HE COULD HAVE RESISTED!
Oh yeah that totally makes it OK to stick your hand in an unconscious woman's underwear.
I agree the friend likely has no actual recourse, but the general attitude of the people on this thread is really, REALLY scary.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
