Ungrateful towards kindness? (talks, person, personality, feel)
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I volunteer with this girl. She's a little bit older than me, and generally a miserable person. She talks behind people's backs constantly and says really harsh things, like that certain people are "idiots" and "useless", just really nasty things. From what I gather she's also unhappy about being single, overweight, and in poor health (her words).
When I first started volunteering there, I noticed that she seemed very lonely and unhappy, so I and a few new volunteers went out of our way to be nice to her. Now I'm starting to realize that the only people she seems to "respect" are the ones who won't give her the time of day. As soon as you're actually nice to her, she starts treating you like you're expendable. If you treat her like crap, she respects you.
I now see, of course, why everyone stays away from her. I do feel bad for her, but I'm so disgusted at how she's acted towards me (and others) that I don't want anything to do with her. I plan on avoiding her from here on out.
My question is, why would a person basically spit in the face of someone who has been kind to them?
I volunteer with this girl. She's a little bit older than me, and generally a miserable person. She talks behind people's backs constantly and says really harsh things, like that certain people are "idiots" and "useless", just really nasty things. From what I gather she's also unhappy about being single, overweight, and in poor health (her words).
When I first started volunteering there, I noticed that she seemed very lonely and unhappy, so I and a few new volunteers went out of our way to be nice to her. Now I'm starting to realize that the only people she seems to "respect" are the ones who won't give her the time of day. As soon as you're actually nice to her, she starts treating you like you're expendable. If you treat her like crap, she respects you.
I now see, of course, why everyone stays away from her. I do feel bad for her, but I'm so disgusted at how she's acted towards me (and others) that I don't want anything to do with her. I plan on avoiding her from here on out.
My question is, why would a person basically spit in the face of someone who has been kind to them?
Just a guess, but maybe she is trying to hurt you before you hurt her.
Sounds bizarre, but it's a possibility. The people who won't give her the time of day are probably "safer" to be around, because she doesn't expect anything out of them, and therefore she won't end up getting hurt later on when she lets her guard down.
Her saying really harsh things about other people might be her projecting her own feelings about herself onto others.
If any of that is the case, it's pretty sad.
Who knows why we humans act and do the things that we do.
Probably just lack of love, past hurts, and current fears.
I volunteer with this girl. She's a little bit older than me, and generally a miserable person. She talks behind people's backs constantly and says really harsh things, like that certain people are "idiots" and "useless", just really nasty things. From what I gather she's also unhappy about being single, overweight, and in poor health (her words).
When I first started volunteering there, I noticed that she seemed very lonely and unhappy, so I and a few new volunteers went out of our way to be nice to her. Now I'm starting to realize that the only people she seems to "respect" are the ones who won't give her the time of day. As soon as you're actually nice to her, she starts treating you like you're expendable. If you treat her like crap, she respects you.
I now see, of course, why everyone stays away from her. I do feel bad for her, but I'm so disgusted at how she's acted towards me (and others) that I don't want anything to do with her. I plan on avoiding her from here on out.
My question is, why would a person basically spit in the face of someone who has been kind to them?
I think knowing what sort of group this is would help...if she's mentally ill.bipolar or disabled in some way or something that explains her personality difficulties and they aren't fixable. What kind of place is this?
Look up reactive attachment disorder, folks with that diagnosis will destroy a relationship so that they control the destruction as they can not accept the risk that someone else may reject them.
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