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Because my mom obviously is super excited about it, is anxiously awaiting the baby pics, and seems to think that I should be on the edge of my seat waiting for this news as well. Otherwise, there was no need to update me as soon as she found out and to mention that she didn't have pics to share just yet.
I feel sorry for your mom. She seems to really care about her family and just wants to share the good news with someone. You can't let your own mother be happy for two seconds? That just comes off as if you are bitter about life. Or maybe you are just self centered since you feel every conversation should revolve around you.
Does your mom have any friends? Do you have any siblings. How old are you and your parents?
Your mom's overly keen interest in the comings & goings of distant relatives you clearly have no relationship with or interest in is reminiscent of the elderly, or someone who doesn't have much of a social life.
I don't have siblings. My mom is friendly and outgoing, so socializing isn't an issue for her. These aren't distant relatives to her. I just don't associate with them.
Quote:
Do you feel these conversations with your mother are vague attempts to guilt you into having "milestones" of your own (e.g. marriage and baby) that you clearly don't want? Maybe that's the real discussion you should be having with her.
I feel sorry for your mom. She seems to really care about her family and just wants to share the good news with someone. You can't let your own mother be happy for two seconds? That just comes off as if you are bitter about life. Or maybe you are just self centered since you feel every conversation should revolve around you.
No, but I feel like her conversation topics revolve around her side of the family 90% of the time and I just get tired of hearing about them. It's like I can't escape what they're doing even though I don't associate with them because she always brings it to my attention. My dad and I have much better conversations.
Well, since the engagement thread was so fun, here we go again! This is actually a different relative who I'm not close to and who I maybe see once a year or less. It's not that I actively dislike him, but he's a bit younger than me so we didn't grow up together, we have nothing in common, and he's not someone who I'd ever associate with if we weren't related. But anyhoo, my mom texted me to inform me that his girlfriend gave birth. I knew she was pregnant and all, but like I said, I don't personally talk to them so it's not like I was on the edge of my seat waiting for news about the baby's arrival. But my mom always insists on telling me news about her side of the family even though she knows I rarely associate with them, and I just keep in touch with the ones who I care to keep in contact with via social media.
So my mom texts me and tells me that his girlfriend just gave birth but she doesn't have any pics to send me yet, and I reply "Cool, I don't want any pics." Now I know that I could just play nice, let my mom send me the pics, say "oh how cute," and then just delete them. But I'm just annoyed at the fact that she thinks I care. She sent me pics of another relative's child yesterday when I've already told her several times that if I wanted to see pictures of this relative, I would just follow her on Instagram. It's like she doesn't get the fact that if I haven't seen the pictures it's because I don't want to see them, so I don't want her forcing me to look at the pictures via text. If she was texting me pictures of cute cats, that would be a different story, but I just don't get excited about babies and kids. I'm sure I'll eventually see the new baby at a family function at some point, but I can wait until then.
Am I in the wrong here?
Just my opinion my love but yes I'd instead do what you said you could have done and be relatively happy and go through the motions.
You don't have to be over the moon about it yourself but as it's clearly very important to your mum I would have been ecstatic for her
You obviously aren't getting the answer you hoped for in your OP. This is not unusual on C/D.
The consensus seems to be that it would take little effort to respond to mom in a manner that wouldn't be offensive nor does it need to be effusive.
You can, however, continue to justify your lack of enthusiasm. Pardon me if I don't buy your "too cool for school" routine.
I don't either. There seem to be single, child free people on CD, supposedly by choice, who are bitter that others have milestones to celebrate and they don't. It comes off as selfish and bitter.
How dare your mother share something she is excited about with you! No, she must only communicate with you on topics YOU are interested in, whatever SHE is interested in is automatically worthless and a waste of your time! How DARE her waste your precious time talking about relatives that SHE cares about? How insensitive of her!
Mod cut.
Last edited by PJSaturn; 05-26-2017 at 08:01 AM..
Reason: Vulgar comment.
I don't either. There seem to be single, child free people on CD, supposedly by choice, who are bitter that others have milestones to celebrate and they don't. It comes off as selfish and bitter.
It's not about being bitter. I mean, good for them that they now have a baby that they can't really financially support on their own. I'm just saying that aside from maybe seeing me once a year, these people never have to think about me or have their days interrupted by hearing news about me, and I just wish that it went both ways.
You obviously aren't getting the answer you hoped for in your OP. This is not unusual on C/D.
The consensus seems to be that it would take little effort to respond to mom in a manner that wouldn't be offensive nor does it need to be effusive.
You can, however, continue to justify your lack of enthusiasm. Pardon me if I don't buy your "too cool for school" routine.
There was no specific answer that I was hoping for. My mom isn't offended (she'd let me know if she was). It's not like she just met me yesterday. She knows how I am.
It's not about being bitter. I mean, good for them that they now have a baby that they can't really financially support on their own. I'm just saying that aside from maybe seeing me once a year, these people never have to think about me or have their days interrupted by hearing news about me, and I just wish that it went both ways.
So a call from your mom is an interuption to your day. Maybe just stop answering the phone.
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