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It's rude. I heard the same thing when I got married in my 30s - from several people. What they were saying was "you old maid, good thing you finally found someone!"
Just terribly insulting. A simple "congratulations" is all that is needed. People who marry later in life want to be treated with the same consideration as everyone else.
I agree, just as for those who become parents later in life.. you definitely deserved and my sib also to be treated with the same basic consideration as someone younger. I truly believe most people who choose to make remarks like that do it to put the other person down— once I was walking out to my front yard and a neighbor I have known a long time said hi and then said “oh, I guess we’re both having a bad hair day aren’t we?” Not to get off track too much but throwing someone in the same category as you I.e. “ oh boy I can see we both have a bit of a weight struggle over the holidays didn’t we?” Is a way of insulting the person in such a way to be somewhat less authentic so it makes it more awkward to say something ( since they included themselves in the put down)
I would say probably most who do this feel somewhat bad about their own life and it’s a way to have some control by putting others down- they see an announcement as an opportunity to put the person down and in a dysfunctional way feel better about themselves
My younger sibling is engaged and supposed to be getting married this summer. He mentioned this to a family friend , I heard with my own ears them say “well better late than never...”
Uh excuse me?
Is that pretty rude and out of place to say in response to an announcement like that? Kind of the same as if you announce your pregnancy and someone says “well I guess better late than never...”
I wanted to say “ and maybe one day you’ll recover from being an idiot- better late than never”
Am I making this a bigger deal than it is or is that as rude as it sounds to me?
Eh no big deal. People say stupid things all the time. My DH and I were together almost 20 years before we got married. Many of his family after hearing of our upcoming marriage said "why"? lol.
Status:
"I don't understand. But I don't care, so it works out."
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So OP, has your brother been living with his fiance for awhile and has a child or two? In that case, although it's still rude, I can see someone saying (especially behind their back) better late than never.
But if they don't have any children, yes, that's just rude.
Of course it's rude. Hopefully, that's one "family friend" who just got crossed off the guest list. Anyone who isn't happy and celebratory over the occasion doesn't need to participate in the festivities.
It sounds like you overheard someone else's conversation. While you have a right to your own opinion, it is not your place to interject that opinion into their conversation. Plus, unless you are part of a complete conversation, it is out of context.....So, you don't know what you don't know.
What in the OP’s message leads you to think the conversation was “overheard”? The OP very well could have been a part of the conversation
So OP, has your brother been living with his fiance for awhile and has a child or two? In that case, although it's still rude, I can see someone saying (especially behind their back) better late than never.
But if they don't have any children, yes, that's just rude.
They do not have any children and wasn’t living w his fiancé or even with her very long either at time they announced it
I got married later in life. I had one person say that exact same thing.
I am actually anti getting married early. Every one of my closest friends, every single person that I am close with (5 former couples), married before 25: is divorced.
Y'know those times when you think of the perfect reply, only hours later and it's now too late? This was not one of those times...
"Better late then never" he said to me.
"Better late, then divorced" I replied.
Yea, he was divorced sharing custody of the 2 kids.
I'm still married today.
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