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1. While interning, my supervisors and coworkers (all who were much older than me) would introduce themselves to me by their first name. I thought I was old enough to where I don't have to call someone Mr. or Mrs. except in formal speech/writing.
There is no "old enough". You certainly call someone's parent by their titles, unless they request otherwise, as a sign of respect. If someone introduces themselves by their first name, then of course you can use it. Co-workers are completely different - they are your peers.
If you are an adult you really should know this by now.
There is no "old enough". You certainly call someone's parent by their titles, unless they request otherwise, as a sign of respect. If someone introduces themselves by their first name, then of course you can use it. Co-workers are completely different - they are your peers.
If you are an adult you really should know this by now.
While I agree with you that it's better to err on the side of formality than to err on the side of informality, the "rules" on this aren't always 100% clear even for someone who has been a successful adult for years, and does their best to be respectful. I would contend that it's even a little harder to navigate this issue now than it was years ago when formality was more the consistent standard. This is evident based on multi-page threads on this forum in which some people (though clearly not the majority) get offended when someone says yes ma'am, or less commonly yes sir (which may be a regional quirk of the Northeastern US).
There is no "old enough". You certainly call someone's parent by their titles, unless they request otherwise, as a sign of respect. If someone introduces themselves by their first name, then of course you can use it. Co-workers are completely different - they are your peers.
If you are an adult you really should know this by now.
But my supervisors introduced themselves to me by their first name--they're a lot older, and are not quite my peers.
"I'm sorry I suggested Miriam has asperger's, as I've gotten to know her I realize nothing could be further from the truth".
OR
"I'm sorry I brought up Miriam's Asperger's symptoms to you. Surely you realized she has those characteristics and I didn't need to bring it up, particularly on a first meeting with you".
Hi Mrs. Smith,
I owe you an apology. Two years ago I must have offended you when I asked you if Miriam had Asperger's. I admit that that was a rude question, as one's psychological history is a sensitive and confidential matter.
I am also sorry that I invited Miriam to my church. I realize that you were probably not comfortable with Miriam going to church with me, her male friend, that you didn't even know.
Please forgive me for my rudeness that day. Nonetheless, I'm glad Miriam is my friend. What has made her such a good friend is her ability to forgive and forget. Despite my rude questions that day, she quickly forgave me. I'm sure you have the same heart as Miriam, and will forgive me, too.
I owe you an apology. Two years ago I must have offended you when I asked you if Miriam had Asperger's. I admit that that was a rude question, as one's psychological history is a sensitive and confidential matter.
I am also sorry that I invited Miriam to my church. I realize that you were probably not comfortable with Miriam going to church with me, her male friend, that you didn't even know.
Please forgive me for my rudeness that day. Nonetheless, I'm glad Miriam is my friend. What has made her such a good friend is her ability to forgive and forget. Despite my rude questions that day, she quickly forgave me. I'm sure you have the same heart as Miriam, and will forgive me, too.
I owe you an apology. Two years ago I must have offended you when I asked you if Miriam had Asperger's. I admit that that was a rude question, as one's psychological history is a sensitive and confidential matter.
I am also sorry that I invited Miriam to my church. I realize that you were probably not comfortable with Miriam going to church with me, her male friend, that you didn't even know.
Please forgive me for my rudeness that day. Nonetheless, I'm glad Miriam is my friend. What has made her such a good friend is her ability to forgive and forget. Despite my rude questions that day, she quickly forgave me. I'm sure you have the same heart as Miriam, and will forgive me, too.
OMG, no!!
Don’t send her this bizarre letter. Are you generally very passive aggressive?
Don’t send her this bizarre letter. Are you generally very passive aggressive?
Not at all. I can see why you thought the last paragraph was passive aggressive. I think once the last paragraph is taken out, it would be a better letter.
If I'm wrong, edit the letter to what you think would be best.
Not at all. I can see why you thought the last paragraph was passive aggressive. I think once the last paragraph is taken out, it would be a better letter.
If I'm wrong, edit the letter to what you think would be best.
Don't send anything at all! This entire idea is horrible.
Don't send anything at all! This entire idea is horrible.
OK, I can see why posters are saying, "It's too late for an apology."
But would you agree that if I had sent an apology right after the incident, it would have been appropriate?
After all, if you're Mrs. Smith and you're offended, you would logically want an apology. To be offended, and then to be even more offended at an apology... hmmm?
Y'know, you started all this off with suggested Miriam has Asperger's, but I'm thinking maybe you need to look a little closer to home, because for the life of me, I cannot figure out how this is four pages in and you're still not getting it.
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