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Yeah, I agree. I would've understood if he would've said "My girlfriend wouldn't appreciate me having your number." I definitely wouldn't even have offered. I was under the impression he was single. My brother was on the phone with his girlfriend and off in his own world, so he wasn't paying attention to our conversation. When I went to my brother and asked him if my "friend" said anything, he said that my "friend" was mindful of our convo and actually said to my brother "I hope everything is ok now and good. I hope she's ok." But then that's when my brother told me he is with his girlfriend again. And he was kinda shocked he didn't tell me that.
Yeah, I'm just going to let it go, but it kinda hurts. I'm not going to lie. Because he should've been more vocal about his situation and I would've backed off. I even messaged him on FB later that day saying I am glad we cleared things up. He replied with a happy message, and saying he loves the fact we are starting fresh, and I should come by and see the baby, etc, etc. It was a good convo, but then there were crickets. Now knowing he has a girlfriend, I'm definitely just trashing everything. I'm honestly hurt by the fact he didn't tell me that so I would know how to engage with him.
Yeah, from your description, it sounds like in that initial visit, he was deliberately trying to sit on the fence. It also sounds like he still has a bit of a thing for you, which makes me wonder about the quality of the relationship with the baby's mom. Not that you should be speculating about that; you're absolutely right in how you're handling it. It's much more of a reflection on him, and how he handles himself.
He obviously just was being polite and I took it as something more.
I agree.
I don't read anything that you've written about his behavior and words that indicates romantic interest. It honestly reads to me like you read into things.
I also don't think you should be so quick to turn your embarrassment into anger at him for being "deceptive." You were friends before, you had a nice conversation, and he is happy that the falling out is over.
Don't make it weird. Just be thankful that y'all patched things up and move on.
Yeah, I agree. I would've understood if he would've said "My girlfriend wouldn't appreciate me having your number." I definitely wouldn't even have offered. I was under the impression he was single. My brother was on the phone with his girlfriend and off in his own world, so he wasn't paying attention to our conversation. When I went to my brother and asked him if my "friend" said anything, he said that my "friend" was mindful of our convo and actually said to my brother "I hope everything is ok now and good. I hope she's ok." But then that's when my brother told me he is with his girlfriend again. And he was kinda shocked he didn't tell me that.
Yeah, I'm just going to let it go, but it kinda hurts. I'm not going to lie. Because he should've been more vocal about his situation and I would've backed off. I even messaged him on FB later that day saying I am glad we cleared things up. He replied with a happy message, and saying he loves the fact we are starting fresh, and I should come by and see the baby, etc, etc. It was a good convo, but then there were crickets. Now knowing he has a girlfriend, I'm definitely just trashing everything. I'm honestly hurt by the fact he didn't tell me that so I would know how to engage with him.
Well, I'm kinda shocked you didn't tell us that in your initial post.
Don't take his smile as anything. I'm not saying it was "fake" necessarily, but he could have just been doing it to show that he thought there should be no hard feelings between you now. And maybe he was sincerely doing that.
Well, I'm kinda shocked you didn't tell us that in your initial post.
Did you want us to think he was single?
I'm not kidding that I spoke to my brother right before I wrote back. So, I'm sorry how I worded it. But it was like moments after my brother's shock and telling me he's not single I wrote that reply.
I'm not kidding that I spoke to my brother right before I wrote back. So, I'm sorry how I worded it. But it was like moments after my brother's shock and telling me he's not single I wrote that reply.
Understood. The whole thing is a moot point anyway, as he's not available.
But if he were, I'd say he may have felt bad about the less than stellar ending and now he's able to put closure on it and move on knowing there are no ill feelings. A new start, as he called it.
and this is why dogs are smarter than humans ….a couple sniffs and they know exactly where they stand...
ok….because most women REFUSE to approach a man or take the initiative... men today have to *****-foot around and dance on the edges ...just so we don't offend...or humiliate ourselves.. we need to read female signs...some are good and sometimes its like reading a rubix cube in the dark...…. many mixed signals...
yes the guy finds you attractive....he will probably hump your leg if you smile at him.... and wink..
if you like this guy and unsure whats going on....send a text over....say hey whats up...want to watch a movie this weekend?? or meet for coffee??
if he refuses … then you gave the boy a chance...
then let it go
I can see how his behavior was deceptive, OP. Honestly, I still think there's more going on there, under the surface, on his part. But there's nothing you can do, since he's back with the baby's mama.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Scrat335
I think he's just looking for another warm place to put it.
Yeah!
IRroses: what you describe him doing is classic flirtation behavior - the eye contact - all that stuff. I have to wonder if he hasn't learned something about "flirtation 101" in the years since you were friends. In your telling, you didn't follow through to the next step, except for the text. He's busy at the moment, with baby mama, so he doesn't have the free time to follow up. And a classic flirtation blunder it to go too fast. Better to go too slow. So it sounds to me like he's still playing his cards.
I hate ghosting - it's SO rude. But it should tell you everything you need to know here.
Could he consider you like a sister? And be relieved you've mended fences? And want to show off his beloved family to you?
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Yeah!
