Where to live: DC, Arlington, Reston or Bethesda for single male 40, for interracial relationships? (Alexandria: receptions, neighborhood)

[ACWhite]

I'm always surprised when people recommend Old Town for OPs who say they will spend most of their work time near Dulles or the tech corridor, which frequently happens in threads here. Old Town is a wonderful area but that commute would be terrible, no matter which route you took, most times of day.

[Nosfaratubite]

I am so appreciative for all of your suggestions and insights guys. Thanks so much for the quick responses.

[SallyField]

Nosfaratubite, based on your last post, it sounds like you've got what you need but I'll add another vote for Dupont or Foggy Bottom. I'm partial to Dupont, having lived there nearly 10 years. Like many people in Dupont, I didn't own a car when I lived there, but it looks like you will need a car. You should know parking can be a chore unless you buy or rent a space (some condos come with a space - this is a huge plus if you're near the Circle).

Dupont is still a major gay hub of the city. It is almost but not quite like SF, where you live now. Some parts of Dupont are more gay than others. South and west of the Circle have a higher gay population, and there are more gay bars around there. A bit east from the Circle, 17th Street is more gay, too. But frankly, none of it is "majority" gay. Even in the most concentrated spots, it's majority straight. Heading north of the circle, up 19th or Connecticut toward Woodley and Adams Morgan, it's more straight. Still plenty of gay folks and retailers catering to them, but a more diverse population. The vast majority are single. A few married couples. Very, very few families or kids. Several longtime Dupont residents.

All in all, Dupont really is a terrific community, and feels like a community within the city. Everyone I knew walked or Metroed to work, and people sat on their stoop and socialized with one another. You always saw people on the street you knew, and the local shop owners got to know you. It was kind of like Sesame Street. But gayer, and without kids anywhere.

Dupont and Foggy Bottom are both safe areas of the city, but neither are as safe as Arlington and certainly neither are nearly as safe as the hard core suburbia that is Reston and Ashburn. In both Dupont and Foggy Bottom, cars get broken into all the time. I mean, all the time. Figure on a smashed car window about once every year or two, if you'll be parking on the street. Violent crime is relatively unheard of, but has happened a few times in the past few years. Arlington is safer, if that's a concern.

Finally, like much of NW DC, Dupont has a rat problem, if nobody has told you yet. Much, much worse than Arlington. Years ago, the city was supposedly cracking down on the rat problem but they still scurry all through the alleyways at night.

I'd recommend you spend an afternoon walking around Dupont to look for condos. Many are announced for sale or rent via a sign on the door or street before they go in MLS.

(Most of) Bethesda is slightly more urban in feel and more diverse than Arlington, but after DC, either Bethesda or Arlington would be my next choice.

Ranking your list, I'd pick:

1. Dupont
2. Foggy Bottom
3. Bethesda
4. Clarendon
5. Courthouse
6. Reston
7. Ashburn

[stpickrell]

You'll meet multi-cultural women pretty much anywhere, even Ashburn.

I'd vary it depending on how often you intend to travel to DC/VA/MD

If you'll be mixing it up or just flat-out don't know: Move to the beating heart of the city, although be prepared for some degree of ASSuming if you go to Dupont.

If you'll be going to VA/DC only: I'd move to Ballston as you'd avoid much of the tie up around Glebe-66 if you're heading out to Tysons or Reston.

If it's VA only? I'd consider Falls Church or Reston if you can get a good deal; keep in mind Reston will be opening its Metro line in about 18 months or so.

If you make $250k and are tall, dark, and handsome, you'll get plenty of dates no matter where you live.

[Yankeesfan]

Why is the race of your hoped-for dates relevant? Why is open bigotry okay here?

[Nosfaratubite]

Yankeesfan, I'm glad you asked a deeper question. As you already know that I'm of Indian origin (so a Caucasian mix, not Dravidian origin) – so I have darker skin than a Caucasian from the UK for example, and can be differentiated on that obvious basis.

However, I have not grown up around Indian communities at any point in my life. Communities instill broad values and therefore expectant behaviors in to their members. Having previously dated across the color and race spectrum, what I personally found is that skin color or cranial structure (for the scientists amongst us) is the least significant differentiator amongst differing racial groups, despite such being the most obvious externally. However, what I did notice is how different racial groups react to different circumstances such as joy, sadness or adversity etc., based on the values their communities have instilled in them. What I observed is that differing racial groups approached the various situations very differently – the end being the same, but method or process being different.

My broad, exaggerated and by no means scientific observations:

Caucasians:
Extroverts (are all Caucasians born extroverts or are there environmental factors involved?) Did the Vikings and/or Germanic people go out to explore and conquer because they were born to do so, or pickings were slim where they lived and had to do it or face an uncertain future?

Indians:
Introverts (are all Indians born Introverts or are there environmental factors involved?) Would Indians have gone and tried to conquer the world if their land from 1000 to 200 years ago was not overflowing with goodies and riches of all sorts and it being the richest country on earth at that time?

So the issue for me is not of race in isolation, but of learned behaviors. Out of first-hand experience I have found that my behaviors on a daily basis more closely mirror a certain group of people who happen to be classified under a certain racial banner different to the one I was stamped with at birth.

I’m not sure if I have addressed your point, but I tried to provide my perspective.

Good question though!

[yrb]

Indian, European, White and Middle Eastern are all in the same race

[brooklynborndad]

Originally Posted by Nosfaratubite

Caucasians:
Extroverts (are all Caucasians born extroverts or are there environmental factors involved?) Did the Vikings and/or Germanic people go out to explore and conquer because they were born to do so, or pickings were slim where they lived and had to do it or face an uncertain future?

Indians:
Introverts (are all Indians born Introverts or are there environmental factors involved?) Would Indians have gone and tried to conquer the world if their land from 1000 to 200 years ago was not overflowing with goodies and riches of all sorts and it being the richest country on earth at that time?

At the risk of going off topic, the Vikings not only had severe food problems at home, they also had internal political instability. once the scandinavians converted to christianity and their dynastic affairs got more settled, the raiding went down (also because the countries they raided developed institutions for containing the raids). The earlier Germans were motivated by being hardpressed by the Huns and other steppe peoples.

Second, ive known gads of introverted euro descended people, in both the jungian and conventional senses of the term, and theres wide literature on them, from Hamlet and brooding Northerner on down. And plenty of at least outgoing south asians. They DID conquer within the peninsula and they spread economically and culturally into SE asia. Conquest east was made difficult by terrain and west by superior military and political organization in Persia. There have only been a few periods in Indian history where the peninsula was united, and AFAIK in all of them Persia was strong in a way that the societies raided by the vikings and conquered by the Germans were not.

[Fern435]

Really wanted to make a comment about the notion of the "perfect woman" but decided not to...

I voted for Arlington. It seems like the best location and environment, given your personality and preferences.

[seiketsu]

OMG please just don't move into my neighborhood, I'm surrounded by enough...as it is.

Clarendon sounds perfect for you. You'll have your pick of naive 23-year-old girls who will be flattered by the attention of a middle-aged, established man.