Is the split between Northern Virginia and the rest of the state getting worse? (Richmond: chapel, house)

[saganista]

Another good thing about NoVa. Almost everybody is a 'come-here'. There's not much stigma attached to being the new guys on the block when the rest of the gang has already walked a mile in your shoes...

[knopfler]

Originally Posted by saganista

That's a stumper, alright. I can't think of any reason why one group might have issues with another for merely stealing their money while calling them loud, brash, tacky, and generally lacking in manners. Sounds like another case of good old Southern Hospitality to me...

That pretty much sums it up. As someone who has kin in Richmond, attended school in Richmond, but grew up and currently live in NoVA (Annandale, Fairfax, and Manassas), it's amazing to me that the Southern hospitality tag still sticks. I've seen Southerners - Virginian and otherwise - be horribly offensive and not have a clue in the world that they're horribly offensive, in about the same frequency as I've seen folks from Northern Virginia be likewise horribly offensive. In my experience, the difference in hospitality is a myth.

[Waterboy526]

Originally Posted by knopfler

That pretty much sums it up. As someone who has kin in Richmond, attended school in Richmond, but grew up and currently live in NoVA (Annandale, Fairfax, and Manassas), it's amazing to me that the Southern hospitality tag still sticks. I've seen Southerners - Virginian and otherwise - be horribly offensive and not have a clue in the world that they're horribly offensive, in about the same frequency as I've seen folks from Northern Virginia be likewise horribly offensive. In my experience, the difference in hospitality is a myth.

I agree. I grew up in Fairfax and live in Raleigh, NC now and this area has also been overrun with Northeasterners, Californians, etc. The funny thing is, that the nicest people I've met here are from the Northeast. A lot of people here will be nice to your face and talk behind your back. Southern Hospitality might exist more in rural areas, but as far as the urban areas even in NC people are no "nicer" then folks from NoVA.

[mark2544]

Things have gotten "worse;" The rest of the state is more nice than it used to be. I went to school in Harrisonburg. What a clean city, with great places to eat. Beautiful mountain views and very low crime.

[vasinger]

Originally Posted by knopfler

That pretty much sums it up. As someone who has kin in Richmond, attended school in Richmond, but grew up and currently live in NoVA (Annandale, Fairfax, and Manassas), it's amazing to me that the Southern hospitality tag still sticks. I've seen Southerners - Virginian and otherwise - be horribly offensive and not have a clue in the world that they're horribly offensive, in about the same frequency as I've seen folks from Northern Virginia be likewise horribly offensive. In my experience, the difference in hospitality is a myth.

You must realize though, I am speaking in generalizations. People are people. Not every southerner is nice and well mannered and not every northern is rude or pushy.

But overall- in general, because the southern lifestyle is more laid back, it allows for more warmer friendlier atmosphere, with people not quite as fast paced , and people smile more.

The one thing I notice about the North is people just don't smile . At all. Not even in restaurants when they are waiting on you.

In NOVA its kind of a mix of that. But when they greet you as "You Guys" instead "Y'all come back now! You realize its really changed.

[vasinger]

Originally Posted by jb124

As a life-long resident of NoVA, I've always considered NoVA to be a separate state, or really just Fairfax and Arlington counties. Now I'd have to draw the line somewhere around the Occuquan (sp?) river or maybe even Fredericksburg.

I say it's a different state because when I went to school in central VA I experienced a significant culture shock. They had a totally different way of life and population compostion down there. Not that it was exactly bad, I think it was good for me to spend four years there to give me perspective.

What was the culture shock you experienced? Do you think its a matter of money , or what? Richmond and a lot of others outside of NOVA are actually right wealthy.

[jb124]

Originally Posted by vasinger

What was the culture shock you experienced? Do you think its a matter of money , or what? Richmond and a lot of others outside of NOVA are actually right wealthy.

It was the two races thing that shocked me mainly/initially. I was used to great diveristy in NoVA and to see only whites and blacks was strange. It also seemed like there was less respect/courtesy between races in SoVA vs NoVA, or the respect/coutesy that I saw seemed very forced/fake.

Another major shock for me was the pace of life thing. People in SoVA are much slower than NoVA. I'm not saying it's necessarily bad, but it was a shock. An example scenario: in NoVA, you go to the DMV and you're in a room with over 100 other people, you take a number and wait 30-45 mins and once you get to the window, you're out in 5 mins. In SoVA, you go to the DMV and there are 5 other people there. You wait 15 mins to get to the window and then you're out in 15-20 mins. The grocery store was the same way.

It also took some time for me to get used to people having conversations with me randomly. Like in DC (moreso than NoVA) if somebody walking by stops and starts up a conversation, the tendency is to be suspicious of his/her real motive; where in SoVa they actually could just simply be talking to you for the heck of it. Again, it's not necessarily bad, but it was something I was not accustomed to.

The people in SoVA were also much more religious than I liked. With the diversity we have up here in NoVA, it's rare for people to mention religion in casual conversation; where in SoVA, I found myself having to explain my beliefs or simply change the subject more often. I also felt like I was getting strange looks when I was doing stuff other than church on Sunday mornings.

The rich/poor thing was noticeable in SoVA, but not much more than in NoVA.

The years I spent in central VA weren't bad or anything and I did try to take some of the positives with me, but I still feel that NoVA is basically a different state from the rest of VA, except maybe for the areas around the state universities.

[Adrian71]

Originally Posted by vasinger

Also, a person from NOVA will get enraged if an outsider suggests in anyway shape or form that they are "Southern". That just seems silly and pathetic to me.

What is wrong with being Southern?

Well, it's usually a bad assumption to make, given how many transplants make up NoVa. I lived all but the last four years of my life in Michigan. I'm still a Midwesterner who came out here for work. I'd never think of myself as a Southerner.

[tenken627]

Originally Posted by vasinger

You must realize though, I am speaking in generalizations. People are people. Not every southerner is nice and well mannered and not every northern is rude or pushy.

But overall- in general, because the southern lifestyle is more laid back, it allows for more warmer friendlier atmosphere, with people not quite as fast paced , and people smile more.

The one thing I notice about the North is people just don't smile . At all. Not even in restaurants when they are waiting on you.

In NOVA its kind of a mix of that. But when they greet you as "You Guys" instead "Y'all come back now! You realize its really changed.

I don't know, a lot of waitresses smile at restaurants that I've been to. I don't remember one not smiling.

I was at Coastal Flats in Tysons a week ago, and I was talking to my friends about what movies to watch and what the movie times were. 5 minutes later, the waitress popped out of nowhere with a printout of all the movie times for us to our surprise. We left her with a very nice tip.

NoVA people are friendly, just because they don't strike a conversation with you randomly on the street doesn't mean they are not. If you are lost, ask directions and you'll find plenty of helpful people.

I've lived here in NoVA, and graduated from VCU. Lived in the Fan area, West End, Henrico County, and even near downtown right across the street from the Jefferson Hotel. I really never distinguished much of a difference in politeness. No one has stopped me to have a conversation out of nowhere. Honestly, there isn't much difference between Richmonders and Northern Virginians other than pace of life.

Everything is percentages. There are rude people everywhere. In a place with more people, there will be more overall rude people. But, that means there are just as many nice ones too.

[Gib]

I can give you a fairly objective outsider's view, from a southern perspective. I've lived in Arlington for 4 years, before that N.C. for most of my life. As you know, most of NOVA is staunchly liberal, to the point that people I only know peripherally automatically assume that I stand to the left of Che Guevara. 90% of the yards on my street sport Democratic political signs around election time; the rest of us either don't wear our politics on our sleeves or are afraid of being shunned by our shocked neighbors if we don't toe the line. I have a few friends who are gay. The ones who live in D.C. would quit their jobs and move across the country before they would move accross the border to Virginia. Two of these friends reluctantly moved from Virginia to D.C. after the last election, along with a few straight friends who also moved out of protest.

Of all of my neighbors, co-workers, and social acquaintances, I am not aware of any who would identify with the politics of most of the rest of Virginia, although many appreciate its weekend getaway possibilities. I would venture that few of them would feel comfortable if they moved farther south and were surrounded by southerners, and conservative ones at that. For every 200 foreign accents I hear in this area, I may hear one southern accent.

Although I'm not familiar with the NOVA you describe from your earlier days, Vasinger, being from N.C. I can understand what you miss. That said, I am thrilled that my son will grow up here, in a much more culturally (if not politically) diverse area than the one I came from.