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Hello! I am new here, and I am hoping to get some advice from you all
We are a family of 7 (yes, 5 kids), and will be moving to Oahu in June 2013 from Montana. I have been trying to educate myself as much as I can about areas to live, employment for myself (nurse), and schools for my kiddos. And while there is a lot of information, most of it is negative and I am very disheartened by what I have been reading Actually, I was super excited at first and now I'm VERY worried! Montana is great, but we have horrible wages and freezing winters. We basically live for 2 1/2 months of summer, Ugh We have visited HI 5 times in the past few years and have all fell in love with the island more and more each time. We have never faced some of the horrible treatment I have been hearing about, but now I am worried about our kids (18,16,16,13,& 10), as we will not be able to afford private schools. How much do I need to worry??? We are a super laid back family (don't need much to be happy), ready to embrace a totally new way of life, and are not going into this move with our eyes shut to expenses etc... With that being said, any input or advice would be gladly accepted!
Thank you!
To start my main concern is for my kids... I keep reading how kids that come in from the mainland are bullied and can have a pretty tough time fitting in at school. All of my kids will be entering middle and high school, so I would like to know what schools might be the best to look into. My husband is used to commuting over 2 hours to work, so we are pretty open to any areas with good schools/ neighborhoods.
Thanks! I wasn't very specific with my ramble!
Julz, I highly recommend that you do not make a move until you have a solid offer of employment for an amount that will cover your living expenses. You have a lot of mouths to feed, and you'll need a decent sized place to rent. At least you're giving yourself a year to do the research.
To start my main concern is for my kids... I keep reading how kids that come in from the mainland are bullied and can have a pretty tough time fitting in at school. All of my kids will be entering middle and high school, so I would like to know what schools might be the best to look into. My husband is used to commuting over 2 hours to work, so we are pretty open to any areas with good schools/ neighborhoods.
Thanks! I wasn't very specific with my ramble!
If you search the forum for "bully" or "bullying" you'll find some threads regarding the topic - I don't recall anyone saying specifically they had an issue with it - seems more urban legend than anything.
Thank you for the suggestions! I will check out the bullying threads.
My husband does have a wonderful job lined up, and will be making substantially more than what we are making here. We currently pay $2,800 for our mortgage with an electric/gas bill that runs over $500 in the winter and about $350 in the summer. I will be glad not to have to buy winter boots/clothes every year, not to mention snow tires
From the research I have done it seems we should be able to find a place, even though much smaller, close to that range. I hear about how much more groceries are, but all of the times we have traveled out there we shop at Costco and the prices have been the same (except milk)... I hope I am not being too optimistic, but I think as far as expenses we should be ok, especially once I am able to find work too. I have heard the nursing situation can be a little tricky. Thanks again for the input!
One good piece of news - it has been my experience that people from midwestern states do better in Hawaii than those from the coasts. You DO need to be mindful and step back and watch before jumping in with comparisons and opinions (it's human nature... I just traveled to Canada and found myself doing that. Had to wear a rubber band on my wrist and snap it each time I caught myself saying, "Well - where I come from...!" So just be aware!)
The similarities between Hawaii and Montana:
People are very willing to help each other out. If you do that, you will get it back in spades.
People are relatively unpretentious, as they are in the midwest, so you will fit in rather well
Being polite is also relatively natural for most midwesterners, and that will go a long way towards ingratiating yourself with the local population
Midwesterners generally enjoy the simple things and aren't forever whining about not having the right kind of Latte or Guccis...... that will also ingratiate you
Live and let live is a Montana philosophy and that works very well in Hawaii
Be willing to eat the food without wrinkling up your nose. Remember that food is a biggie for everyone -- bring in things you grew or made at home to share at work. Never go to anyone's house empty handed. Always jump in and offer to help set the table, clear the table, bring food, help someone with whatever -- moving, putting on a party, etc.
When I moved there (I'm a South Dakota girl) it felt like HOME. Even though I'll admit sometimes people may find me a bit much, for some reason, when I was with locals it was just easy to kick back and be more humble and helpful than I was during my brief stint in California. I think I felt the competition in CA, but in Hawaii, they just liked me for me and it was wonderful.
That's not to say I didn't run into problems. We ARE the minority there, and there are some who think we should all go home. I was told that on a few occasions. But I wound up marrying into local families (yeah, plural, not at the same time though! ) And for the most part, it was a good run.
Teach your kids to come to you immediately if they run into problems. Find ways to mediate the problems early on rather than letting it build. Kids are sometimes just mean. And that's anywhere. We are living in troubled times. But if your kids aren't aggressive, and if they learn to fish and surf and do all the things kids love to do over there, they should be able to weather the occasional storms.
BTW - private schools aren't necessarily going to protect them. There are some schools that are very good in spite of being public schools.
On another note - feeding five kids is going to be a challenge. We had four and my husband joined the National Guard to get us base privileges. Those commissary prices really helped with the food bill. And during the hurricanes and 9/11 aftermath, there was more food at the commissary than on regular grocery shelves. Consider fruit trees, a garden, chickens if you can... anything to help supplement the food that's available. Maybe join a co-op so you can trade with others who are also growing. Just a thought. You can do without a lot of electricity expense, without too many shoe expenses (the kids all wear flip flops), and without much of an entertainment budget. But you can't go without food - and that should be your biggest concern.
Hawaii has been overrun with people who move in with great ideas on how to change it. Come in with your wonderful family, love the people and the place for what it is. Be yourself but don't try and turn it into Montana, and you will be fine.
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