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I'm sorry, I'm not gonna tell you guys the stupidest thing I did. I get the heebies...Oh no...I just thought
of another one ..
oh nonono, I am Not telling anyone THIS! And you can imagine this is to strangers on line!
I was cooking one time, I had something in the oven, the surface of the stove was hot, and I was cooking something, following a recipe in a recipe book next to what I was cooking. Out of nowhere, the cookbook flew up off the stove with a hole in it.
Accidentally, I had set a cigarette lighter on the stove with the book on top! It exploded!
For a moment I actually thought it was something paranormal that happened!
When I was a teenager, I was naive and sheltered. But once I started dating I tried really hard to be more sophisticated and copy some of the expressions I heard the in the hallways at school. One afternoon my boyfriend, a very conservative, strait-laced devout Southern Baptist, came over to visit. He mentioned something bad that happened to him, and (thinking I was so cool) I blurted out, "That's really horny!"
I was cooking one time, I had something in the oven, the surface of the stove was hot, and I was cooking something, following a recipe in a recipe book next to what I was cooking. Out of nowhere, the cookbook flew up off the stove with a hole in it.
Accidentally, I had set a cigarette lighter on the stove with the book on top! It exploded!
For a moment I actually thought it was something paranormal that happened!
I'm reminded of the time I tried to take the chill off a refrigerated Arby's sandwich. I put it with its wrapper in the microwave and it caught fire. Turns out the silver part of the wrapper contains aluminum and you know what they say about not putting metal in a microwave. But then I opened the microwave door to put it out and bits of burning wrapper wafted out. I probably should have just turned the microwave off and it would have starved of oxygen. But instead I found myself stomping the wrapped sandwich. I opened the wrapper. My shoe had not touched the sandwich. It was a little flat. I ate the sandwich. It was good.
About 10 years ago I flew to Reno, rented a car to drive to Boise. Plane was late and I told them at the rental place no need to clean the car or windshield I was in a hurry. No time to even inspect it.
As I was driving east on I-80 I started to hear this rapping sound coming the trunk and the faster I drove, the more rapping sounds. Then, I started to worry. Maybe, just maybe, there's a body in the trunk, tied up and duct taped, trying to send me a message?
As I heard more rapping I decided to satisfy my curiosities at the next exit ramp with a gas station. I sidelined some woman going into the store and I told her to be a witness when I opened the trunk. I opened it, no body!
She had a very keen eye and spotted a plastic strip hanging from the back of the car, which was flapping against the trunk all along.
All I have to do is be in a room with a ladder to fall off of it. Just the thought of a ladder causes me to begin to lose my balance.
One time when I was in outside sales, I had to make a big presentation. Wow, everyone was SO NICE. And I made the sale pretty quickly too! I was so proud of myself and my business acumen. Plus, honestly, I was feeling pretty cute and spiffy. When I got back out to my car, I lowered the mirror to re apply my lipstick, and I realized I had a big booger in my nose.
It would work as mace, but could be considered against the law.
Attacking people such that they need to use mace is also illegal and certainly does not have the moral high ground.
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