Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
There is an expectation that you must have kids if you are married for some reason with most people, and if you don't then there is something wrong with you. . And the movie comment is complete bull. I find that parents who do that want to give up all their free time and have none. It's very easy to take one day a week and have a date night. Most choose to engage in child worship and do nothing outside of kids.
That kind of depends. Between the cost of a babysitter, the price of two movie tickets, and some popcorn and drink, we're talking $100. Once a week? Not gonna happen, not on our budget. And if you want to get a bite to eat beforehand, forget it. Pretty expensive date night.
Now, if you have family members willing to watch your kids for a few hours free of charge, a movie once a week might be doable. However, I would venture to say that most parents have already spend well over the $100 to take the entire family to see a family movie at least once in a month....so, you do the math. That monthly entertainment expense quickly becomes quite expensive.
Of course, since the OP doesn't presently have children and we are talking about family here, maybe the OP can volunteer to babysit once in awhile and give the parents a desperately needed night out.
Hello.
We currently don't have children.
Whenever we meet families who have children, they always make comments like 'wait till you have children, you'll see.' Or wait till you have children you won't go and see movies anymore. Anytime they have to take care of their kid, hold them and walk back and forth with them. Or discipline them, they make these comments. And they say it multiple times throughout the entire night/weekend. (If it's family and they are staying over, they'll say it the whole time).
I don't know why, but it really irritates me.
There's only two possible reasons someone doesn't have kids,
It's either because of choice or I can't. So why do people just assume we're going to have kids? I don't get it.
Perhaps they're picking up on your irritation, and think you're irritated at the kids, or at the disruption kids cause in your house, and are trying to explain that things change when you have children, and that when you have them you'll understand what they're going through. It's not necessarily a dig, per se.
And there are more than two possible reasons someone doesn't have kids. One big possible reason is that they are waiting to have them. If you don't have kids for the other two reasons perhaps you could let your friends and family in on it so they'll stop assuming and won't include you in the future parent comments.
Also, you could be taking it all a bit too seriously.
That kind of depends. Between the cost of a babysitter, the price of two movie tickets, and some popcorn and drink, we're talking $100. Once a week? Not gonna happen, not on our budget. And if you want to get a bite to eat beforehand, forget it. Pretty expensive date night.
Now, if you have family members willing to watch your kids for a few hours free of charge, a movie once a week might be doable. However, I would venture to say that most parents have already spend well over the $100 to take the entire family to see a family movie at least once in a month....so, you do the math. That monthly entertainment expense quickly becomes quite expensive.
Of course, since the OP doesn't presently have children and we are talking about family here, maybe the OP can volunteer to babysit once in awhile and give the parents a desperately needed night out.
Yes, $100. $12 an hour for a babysitter - that is the going rate for teens in our area - times 3.5 hours comes to $42. Then $16.95 a ticket for the movie plus tax is about $35. Popcorn and soda, about $16. Total, $93. Factor in the gas plus snacks for the sitter, and it's easily a $100.
Our matinee movies are $12.95, so that would save $8 I guess. I guess a shorter movie would shave off a few bucks as well. Dollar movies theaters? Not around here.
But I'm not trying to argue here, just stating the fact that many couples with children really can't afford a sitter and movie once a week.
Hello.
We currently don't have children.
Whenever we meet families who have children, they always make comments like 'wait till you have children, you'll see.' Or wait till you have children you won't go and see movies anymore.
Anytime they have to take care of their kid, hold them and walk back and forth with them. Or discipline them, they make these comments. And they say it multiple times throughout the entire night/weekend. (If it's family and they are staying over, they'll say it the whole time).
I don't know why, but it really irritates me.
There's only two possible reasons someone doesn't have kids,
It's either because of choice or I can't. So why do people just assume we're going to have kids? I don't get it.
It's probably not intentional on their part, although I do agree that it's highly annoying. I agree that it might just be that they're feeling defensive or feeling judged. We have one child, and sometimes people say things like "wait until you have two!" That's annoying, too, but I try not to take it personally. I don't think they're spending any time thinking about your situation, personally, and I'd take the "wait until YOU have kids" to be more of a general you rather than you specifically.
And to the poster who talked about dollar movies and cheap movie nights out: count yourself lucky that you live somewhere cheap, then! That has definitely not been the case where we've lived. It would be very easy to blow $100 on a night (or even afternoon) out at the movies in many American cities. That's why we don't go to the movies these days! (and we definitely don't engage in "child worship" or have interests that revolve solely around our kid)
Yes, $100. $12 an hour for a babysitter - that is the going rate for teens in our area - times 3.5 hours comes to $42. Then $16.95 a ticket for the movie plus tax is about $35. Popcorn and soda, about $16. Total, $93. Factor in the gas plus snacks for the sitter, and it's easily a $100.
Our matinee movies are $12.95, so that would save $8 I guess. I guess a shorter movie would shave off a few bucks as well. Dollar movies theaters? Not around here.
But I'm not trying to argue here, just stating the fact that many couples with children really can't afford a sitter and movie once a week.
$12 an hour for a babysitter! We pay the 14 year old girl down the street $6 an hour, and we're her top-paying parents. $12 is more than the minimum wage. I've never heard of such a thing. Snacks for the sitter? We already have snacks in our house for our children, so no extra expense there. Popcorn and soda at the movies? Completely unnecessary. There, the cost of the movie date is now down to about $40.
Some parents can't afford movie dates even at $40, and that's the reality of the current economy. However, that doesn't mean that they can't still have adult lives and do things together without their children. They may need to be more creative, trade child care with other parents, take walks in the park or go out for coffee instead of a movie.
While there is definitely an aura of misery loves company, I also think the parents may be feeling judged or that you disapprove of things. We sometimes get the feeling that my SIL and her fiancee question things my wife and I do or how we handle the kids. They don't have kids, but want them. Even without them saying anything, the feeling that they disapprove or that they would do things different is enough to make us a little defensive and give the occasional wait until you have kids of your own comment.
As much as people without children (for whatever reason) are annoyed by the things parents do, parents are just as annoyed by the feeling they get or comments from the childless who seem to think they know better or could never see themselves doing what the parents are doing. While the childless have never walked a mile in a parents shoes, parents have walked a mile in the childless's shoes.
$12 an hour for a babysitter! We pay the 14 year old girl down the street $6 an hour, and we're her top-paying parents. $12 is more than the minimum wage. I've never heard of such a thing. Snacks for the sitter? We already have snacks in our house for our children, so no extra expense there. Popcorn and soda at the movies? Completely unnecessary. There, the cost of the movie date is now down to about $40.
Some parents can't afford movie dates even at $40, and that's the reality of the current economy. However, that doesn't mean that they can't still have adult lives and do things together without their children. They may need to be more creative, trade child care with other parents, take walks in the park or go out for coffee instead of a movie.
We'd barely make it out the door without it costing us at least that much. $6 an hour? Never. Maybe we could find an 11 year old that would do it for a minimum of $8? Believe me, even that would be a stretch.
$6/hour for a babysitter? Good luck with that in most major American cities. Again, some of you are lucky to live in lower-cost locations!
It's tough enough to find any teenager to babysit these days, as so many have so many other planned activities to attend. In many cities the era of the affordable teenage babysitter down the block has long passed. Where we've lived babysitters usually charge well above minimum wage.
We, too, might get the 11 year old down the block to watch our son for $8 (if she's not busy with one of her many activities or doesn't have too much homework.) Anyone in high school or above, though? Not a chance.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
. And the movie comment is complete bull. I find that parents who do that want to give up all their free time and have none. It's very easy to take one day a week and have a date night. Most choose to engage in child worship and do nothing outside of kids.
