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So I've been quite serious with my girlfriend and decided to tell my parents that I am dating someone just to see what they say since I've never told them anything about any of my relationships before and it turns out they are not fond of my decision because my girlfriend is half Puerto Rican and half Jamaican.
Which is incredibly ironic since I'm half Asian and half Italian/German/all that stuff.
They don't like her because she appears to be black. Which I guess she sort of is but I don't really care. My relationship with my parents isn't all that tight anyway so should I just let it go and leave it as it is and not provide them with anymore info regarding my hot girlfriend and me?
It's a rough situation. I know my mom was so shocked when I went out with a Korean man. I think your parents should be more open minded. But I find certain generations and types of people just can't accept things.My German side of the family loved my Korean German Irish Cherokee son right away. My Irish side of the family were shocked and yelled at me. But once they saw him as a baby they spoiled him and adored him.
When my son dates I hope he dates a nerd to be honest. Lol
I think your folks just need to get used to the idea. And used to your very pretty lady. After all she is what you like.
I get looks all the time when my very Irish looking butt picks up my Asian looking child. At least if you have children it's not that abnormal to see Asian and Black.
My dad isn't racist as far as I know. Yeah he might let out a racial joke sometimes, and I may do the same since I grew up with it, but it's all in good fun and our black/asian friends usually laughs too.
If my dad didn't like who I was dating, then he'd never see her and I'd never introduce her to him, but I know he's not that way, and I date who I want to date and he has no control over it.
I dated (and lived with) a man my parents did not approve of in my early 20s. He did not make much money, had two children with two different women, had barely graduated high school (though he had a trade school certification) and looked very sketchy (scars, tattoos and long hair). I made it clear that those "issues" were out of bounds, but that if they didn't like the way he was treating me, they could feel free to bring it up with me. Except, as my mother put it to one of my friends rather disgustedly, "he treats her [treated me] like gold." Further, after watching the two us get into an involved discussion about a book we were reading, she couldn't really use her "He's not your intellectual equal" argument.
And by "out of bounds" I mean I would end the conversation and get off the phone or leave the house, politely and firmly. I made clear to them if they forced me to make a choice based on nonsubstantial reasons, I would choose him.
I eventually dumped him because he continued to make irresponsible choices. But not because of his appearance, income level or educational background. My parents have continued to maintain a policy of not involving themselves in my relationships.
Set boundaries, and then enforce them. Don't have temper tantrums or fights. "I'm sorry, but I'm not having this discussion with you." is a useful stock phrase.
both sides were against me since the day i was bornnnn (cher)
you cant please everyone, so you've got to please yourself (r.n.)
your parents should be happy or content, if YOU are happy or content-otherwise, do they really support you? and if they dont,,,then their opinion shouldnt mean much
You have a chioce and that's suck up their racist behavior or disown them. If any of my family felt that way about a person I chose to associate with they can either change their ways or take a hike.
I realize that I am an adult. Even as an adult, I still want to have somewhat of a decent relationship with my parents. That's why this upsets me.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Raena77
It's a rough situation. I know my mom was so shocked when I went out with a Korean man. I think your parents should be more open minded. But I find certain generations and types of people just can't accept things.My German side of the family loved my Korean German Irish Cherokee son right away. My Irish side of the family were shocked and yelled at me. But once they saw him as a baby they spoiled him and adored him.
When my son dates I hope he dates a nerd to be honest. Lol
I think your folks just need to get used to the idea. And used to your very pretty lady. After all she is what you like.
I get looks all the time when my very Irish looking butt picks up my Asian looking child. At least if you have children it's not that abnormal to see Asian and Black.
Your son is like me! I'm Native American too with some random European blood too!
I love dark skin chicks; I can't help it. But Blasian kids are hard to come by.
I realize that I am an adult. Even as an adult, I still want to have somewhat of a decent relationship with my parents. That's why this upsets me.
Your son is like me! I'm Native American too with some random European blood too!
I love dark skin chicks; I can't help it. But Blasian kids are hard to come by.
Lol he's like you. I think blasian kids are great looking. Lol think Tyres. That great looking guy in Too Fast and Furious and a model.
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