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More and more women are having babies in their 30's and 40's. I guess a married couple can enjoy life while they're young and then settle into having a family. But I feel the older we get, the more we might appreciate slowing down and relaxing - at least I do. At 39, I can't imagine being responsible for another human being for 18 more years.
I also like being young enough to be able to relate to my son during his entry into adulthood. He likes being around me, wants me to tear up the town with him when he turns 21. I'm not much of a party gal anymore, but I love that he thinks I'm "cool" enough to party with.
Your thoughts?
To each their own, but I wouldn't want to be an old man with teenage kids. I think I found a happy medium....we had our kids when I was 27 and 32. Not too young, not too old.
This is the one thing that makes me sad about having kids later. My father died 17 years ago and my DH's dad died the year our oldest was born, so neither of our children knew their grandfathers. But I also didn't know my grandfathers (they died prior to my birth) and my parents had me when they were 30 and 32, so there's no guarantee by having kids younger that they will know their grandparents. Fortunately, my mother and mother-in-law, though elderly, are in very good health and are overjoyed to finally have grandchildren from us .
Your right, no guarantee's in life. And some time is better than none, and obviously you can live without grandparents. I had many friends growing up with wonderful grandparents and I can remember how envious I was because I didnt have any. I volunteered at a retirement facility and and nursing home and I used to love hearing their stories and asking for advice. My situation was different though. I was raised by my grandmother so she was my mom.
I also had an old neighbor who had her little girl at 41. Her mom was in excellent health and will probably be a great grandmother for a long time.
Just the financial aspects of being an older parent are worth it. Kids don't need to be raised in a household that is stressed because their parents are living hand to mouth.
I believe this is a more modern idea. Looking back at my family and others, they were poor by todays standards. Grandpas worked 12 hr. days, kids worked the farm they only ate meat on Sunday, got one pair of shoes a yr, blah blah blah. Your parents must not have told you the story about walking 10 miles to school barefoot, in the snow up hill both ways. Anyway, the point is that money isnt necessary to raise a happy family.
I had my kids young and their father died when they were 6 and 1. We had a rough time financially. I had to work 2 part time jobs and get my college degree. Looking back I dont know how I managed, but in some ways I believe that made us both closer and stronger. I'm 40+ now, doing much better financially and am more mature (old) but cant imaging having young kids at this point. I have much admiration for women who can start families later in life.
There are clearly two sides to even the flattest pancake. Sure, we had less money when our kids were young but little kids don't cost all that much. If you are even halfway good with money you can raise kids on very little and it doesn't have to be a point of stress. Now that we are older and have higher income, more savings, we can do more with our older children and we all appreciate it but I'm kinda glad we didn't 'have it all' when they were younger. It gave us a real appreciation of spending time together (playing a game, riding bikes, going for a walk, etc) instead of spending $60+ for us all to go to a movie where we sit and stare at a screen instead of interact with each other. I think we appreciate and enjoy each other and a simpler lifestyle now because we didn't have it all and do it all and have our family focused on material possessions and activities.
And I won't lie, the idea of being financially secure and only 46 years old when our youngest is done with college is VERY EXCITING!!
I had my kids young but I can tell you this my kids have wanted for very little. They've had 4-wheelers, dirt bikes, horses, way too many toys, trips to florida, wyoming, and a mom that read to them everynight, a dad that taught them to fish, quailty time and lots of love. And I had my first at the age of 17. But I didn't want to be like other teen moms so I worked hard to overcome many statistics. I have taught my kids the value of a dollar, the respect of another human being, to love theirselves ect. ect..
I had my kids young but I can tell you this my kids have wanted for very little. They've had 4-wheelers, dirt bikes, horses, way too many toys, trips to florida, wyoming, and a mom that read to them everynight, a dad that taught them to fish, quailty time and lots of love. And I had my first at the age of 17. But I didn't want to be like other teen moms so I worked hard to overcome many statistics. I have taught my kids the value of a dollar, the respect of another human being, to love theirselves ect. ect..
for those of you that decided to pop out as many kids as possible before your 24th birthday so you wouldn't be "old" raising kids why didn't you just foster a child?
for those of you that decided to pop out as many kids as possible before your 24th birthday so you wouldn't be "old" raising kids why didn't you just foster a child?
Why, when we could pop our own??
Why don't old parents foster kids instead of having their own? They have more life experience, better off financially, more prepared, more stable emotionally.....sounds like foster kids would be better off there rather than with the young, immature, poor, foolish young folks who just pop out babies.
Your right, no guarantee's in life. And some time is better than none, and obviously you can live without grandparents. I had many friends growing up with wonderful grandparents and I can remember how envious I was because I didnt have any. I volunteered at a retirement facility and and nursing home and I used to love hearing their stories and asking for advice. My situation was different though. I was raised by my grandmother so she was my mom.
I also had an old neighbor who had her little girl at 41. Her mom was in excellent health and will probably be a great grandmother for a long time.
And then there are people like me. My mom died when I was 22. I would have had to have been a teen mom for her to have lived long enough to spend any time with her grand kids.
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but cant imaging having young kids at this point. I have much admiration for women who can start families later in life.
